Ch.148Chapter 148. MeleeSpy Attack Squad (2)

# Chapter 148. MeleeSpy Attack Squad (2)

The title itself is unusual.

Even while thinking ‘This must be another troll post,’ I clicked on it as if entranced.

[MeleeSpy: Come to think of it, I believe I wanted to be a hero.

Like protagonists in comics and novels, I wanted to overcome various hardships and trials with precious comrades and save the world.

That’s why life on Earth was boring. I had neither the power to save the world nor comrades as precious as my own life.

The first time I was possessed into this game was three years ago, when I was trying to access ItemManiac to sell my Champions of Storm account that I had built up for 10 years (it was at Grandswordmaster rank).

As the #1 ranked player in ‘Surviving as Paladin,’ I confidently dreamed of monopolizing all hidden pieces and becoming the strongest min-maxer in history…]

Ah, this kid. He really can’t write for shit. Why is it so all over the place?

He’s probably lost the ability to write normally because he’s always posting stuff like EunuchBro and troll posts.

Still, I was curious about what he was trying to say, so I continued reading.

MeleeSpy is writing about himself in a community post for the first time. He might be sharing some useful information.

[…I thought I just needed to reach max level.

No.

It was impossible.

Anyone would have thought the same upon seeing that mountain-like body with seven unholy heads.

Only then did I realize why the goddess Ishtania kept possessing new people to maintain around 100 paladins whenever we died.

That woman wasn’t continuing to possess people because she wanted to watch us die in agony.

She believed that to close the dimensional gate and ‘definitively’ drive out the demons, she needed ‘100 max-level paladins.’

Despite the countless sacrifices, she thought she could eventually create 100 max-level paladins.

How many Earthlings would be sacrificed? Tens of thousands? Millions? I couldn’t even guess.

If even I, with my supreme talent, was struggling against the wall, could others reach max level? At that time, I thought it was impossible.

I lost all motivation…]

I knew that Ishtania wasn’t just possessing people who enjoyed games for fun.

I just didn’t know it was such a grand scheme.

It’s a plan that requires viewing human lives as consumables. It’s a concept only possible for a god or monster, not a human.

I continued scrolling down.

Overall, while the content was shoddy, it showed signs of having been written after days of contemplation.

[My nickname is MeleeSpy, and my paladin name is EunuchBro.

Level 999… no, level 9, the strongest paladin.

(Honestly, if I had just killed one or two more high-ranking demons, max level would have been totally possible)

Inheriting the will of George and his attack squad, I’m now going to do what I should have done long ago.

The demons are currently gathering at the capital. Since the cloud demon who acted as their commander-in-chief died, they must be feeling threatened and preparing for an all-out war.

That’s how much they fear the god called Malak. They’ve abandoned the idea of coming down to Symphonia to kill us and decided to defend the capital instead.

Now that the cloud demon is gone, there are no more buster calls. They won’t turn back just to kill a few paladins.

It’s the optimal situation to move if you’re not a paladin living near the capital.

I plan to head down to Symphonia while cutting off the heads of demons heading to the capital.

Once there, as the representative of the EunuchBro attack squad, I will form an alliance with the tribal federation.

Why? Because that god called Malak, who supposedly played with the cloud demon like a baby, might be the only one who can end this apocalypse.

Those whose will remains unbroken, come. I will lead you myself. Let’s fight together with the fate of the world at stake.

The EunuchBro attack squad begins here today.

(Photo of a flag with ‘EunuchBro Attack Squad’ written in the center, fluttering)

DM me]

It’s… cool, but there are many parts that break the mood.

Right, MeleeSpy. Being cool doesn’t suit you. This kind of idiocy is what makes you MeleeSpy.

Anyway, MeleeSpy had found the courage to fight and was trying to form an attack squad. The second attack squad following George’s.

My actions had changed his despairing heart.

When someone shows courage like this, they deserve some praise. I should leave a positive comment.

– Comments –

[WolfMan: EunuchBro attack squad lmao wtf]

[Jackal: So where’s my next chapter of EunuchBro?]

[NotACatfish: Give me a three-line summary]

[ShotgunAttack: Saw MeleeSpy wrote this, scrolled all the way down to the comments]

[CowBikiniDance: What EunuchBro attack squad, just call it MeleeSpy attack squad]

ㄴ [TrustedMonkeyUncle: For real lol]

[Ghoulr: Even lies show dedication at this point]

[MorningTentInstaller: Acting like the strongest paladin lol Princess Dina is also level 9]

Nobody was taking MeleeSpy’s words seriously.

Well, this is all MeleeSpy’s karma. Who told him to post nonsense all the time?

[3rep500: No one’s falling for MeleeSpy’s bait again, right?]

ㄴ [MeleeSpy: This isn’t bait. I promise on my honor]

ㄴ [Boboho: What honor do you have to stake lol]

ㄴ [TrustedMonkeyUncle: DarkYami “EunuchBro… another troll post. You are like the boy who cried wolf.”]

ㄴ [TrustedMonkeyUncle: DarkYami “Sigh~ DeathOdin, handle this.”]

ㄴ [MorningTentInstaller: DeathOdin “YES SIRㅡ.「MASTER」ㅡ!”]

ㄴ [MorningTentInstaller: DeathOdin “Firing Odin Cannon!” (Pububububung~!)]

ㄴ [TrustedMonkeyUncle: MeleeSpy-ham, hurry up and respond. It’s your turn, bro]

These already unhinged guys have formed their final form by gathering together.

Bringing Siwoo and Monkey into the tribal federation and having them stay in the same space might be my worst mistake.

But I didn’t create these monsters.

ㄴ [MeleeSpy: …]

MeleeSpy… these are the monsters you created.

I decided not to comment. If I defended MeleeSpy in this atmosphere, I’d be treated like an idiot too.

Still, not everyone was dismissing MeleeSpy’s ambitions as nonsense.

[Ghoulr: Just sent MeleeSpy a DM lol

I was bored with nothing to do, so I thought why not, and it turns out he’s actually near me.

If we really meet up, I’ll post proof pics.

Are we going to the MeleeSpy attack squad?]

A fresh post that just went up.

Ghoulr. This user has been in the community for quite a while too. Based on their posts, they seem to be someone who moved around a lot like Hanna.

The fact that they’ve survived this long while living as a wanderer suggests they might be a capable paladin.

Oh, I got a private message.

[PetitNoa: Lakye is asking angrily where that paladin called Sans is ( ; ω ; )]

What’s this about?

[Why?]

[PetitNoa: She’s asking why that messenger can communicate with Malak when even I, who has attained divinity, cannot…]

[PetitNoa: She says she’ll severely punish him for the crime of impersonating Malak…]

Ah, she’s jealous.

Malak always told her “you’re the first,” and now she can’t believe he’s only communicating with Sans instead of her.

[Doesn’t she know that I received the blessing of ‘Roa’s Messenger’ from Malak?]

I had explained this to Lakye before.

[PetitNoa: She says you never mentioned that Malak could communicate with him even without manifesting]

[PetitNoa: She’s asking if he’s plotting something strange while Malak is absent]

[PetitNoa: Or if he’s being controlled after falling victim to someone like Charon and trying to extract information…]

[PetitNoa: She says civilized people and possessed ones can’t be trusted (｡•́︿•̀｡)]

Lakye is one of the few natives who knows that paladins are possessed people. Since we spent a lot of time together, I thought I couldn’t hide it from her and revealed it first.

[PetitNoa: It’s too much, we’re supposed to be comrades]

Hmm. I can see why she might think that.

That’s Lakye for you. She may seem to rely more on strength than brains, but she’s actually smart.

In fact, it’s surprising I haven’t been suspected like this until now.

As Hanna said, I never showed my face even during important battles.

People just accepted Sans the paladin’s existence because it was Malak, an object of worship, who confirmed it. Now that Malak is absent, I’m being questioned.

They don’t seem to have considered the possibility that the divine being and the paladin could be the same person, or that Malak could be possessed—it’s too unrealistic.

It would be harder to believe than a billionaire being a superhero. The solemn and mighty god Malak turning out to be a possessed person who uses casual speech?!

How could anyone think that without knowing the full context?

Besides, if you start suspecting even gods of being possessed, there’s no end to it. It’s a completely different issue from monsters like AtomicRex being possessed.

What if the goddess is also possessed? The demons? Perhaps even the evil god? It’s just confusing.

It’s fortunate that Noa trusts me enough to relay this information without hiding anything. It would have been annoying if Noa had joined in trying to test me.

Faced with this sudden crisis, I racked my brain.

To convince Lakye, I’ll need a different approach than the one I used with Hanna.