Ch.147Chapter 147: Evening (2)

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After concluding the small incident that began in the cafeteria, I finally arrived at the infirmary.

The evening meal, which started when I handed the tray of food to Shizu who was waiting for me there, was peaceful.

As they say, hunger is the best sauce.

“Delicious…”

Shizu, whose suppressed appetite had been liberated, continued eating the food on her tray slowly but without pause, when suddenly.

“…Aren’t you eating, Cal?”

She expressed her puzzlement toward me as I had only given her a tray and wasn’t touching any food myself.

“It was difficult to carry two trays, so I ate something simple at the cafeteria before coming.”

I reassured her in a calm tone.

It wasn’t a lie.

Before filling her tray at the serving counter, I had eaten a balanced selection of food, starting with meat and taking one or two bites of everything else, which was enough to satisfy my hunger.

Normally, that wouldn’t have been nearly enough to say I’d filled my stomach, but.

Thanks to the cancellation of a certain “schedule” that would have rapidly depleted my energy today.

The small meal was sufficient to maintain my strength without any major issues.

Perhaps sensing the sincerity in my calm tone and expression.

Shizu, who had been chewing her food with a healthy appetite, swallowed what was in her mouth and then.

“…I’m sorry.”

She suddenly apologized to me.

I thought I had conveyed my message clearly without any misunderstanding.

While I didn’t understand why her voice carried such apologetic tones.

“If only I wasn’t confined to the infirmary, we could have eaten together leisurely…”

As I heard her apology with that regretful voice trailing off, I could easily understand why she was apologizing to me.

She was grateful for even the smallest things I did.

And apologized for the most trivial matters.

Seeing Shizu like this, I couldn’t stop the corners of my mouth from turning upward.

“Ah… you smiled.”

I had smiled enough for Shizu, who was right in front of me, to notice.

I quickly tried to bring my hand to the corner of my mouth to compose my expression, but.

“Why did you smile?”

Her questioning voice, tinged with doubt after seeing my faint smile in response to her apology, was even quicker.

When I directed my gaze toward her, I could see a hint of anxiety in her expression as she questioned me.

Ah, she must be worried about what I’m thinking after seeing me smile so suddenly.

I should give an appropriate answer to her question to ease her anxiety.

That’s what I decided in my mind, but.

When I actually tried to answer, I couldn’t think of a good response that would fit the question.

Hmm, what answer would elicit a positive reaction from her?

After briefly contemplating what to say to her.

“Because I’m grateful…”

The phrase that came out of my mouth regarding the identity of my recent smile was that it came from feeling grateful to her for worrying about me.

“…”

For some reason, her expression showed a faint blush after hearing my answer.

Unlike her usual self who would maintain eye contact with me as much as possible, she slightly turned her head to hide her embarrassment.

Looking at Shizu like that.

“…Cute.”

My mouth blurted out an unfiltered appreciation that hadn’t been approved by my brain.

“…!!”

Shizu’s face, which was already trying not to meet my gaze, became flushed with enough heat to keep her warm throughout this winter and then some.

Ah, so cute.

This time I only thought it to myself without expressing it out loud, but.

Shizu really is cute.

A corner of my heart was warming up as I watched her adorable appearance, but.

‘My past self was so crushed by inferiority that he only ran away from the responsibility given to him, leaving this girl behind.’

As I looked at her, I also recalled my shameful actions from a time that now only I remember—a time when I made many people around me unhappy through my misguided choices.

In the past, even the mere recollection of such painful memories would have been unbearable, but.

For the current me who moves forward one step at a time with a clear understanding of what needs to be done.

The bitter memories of the past don’t just bring pain.

They serve as faithful signposts, clearly showing me the paths I must never take as I move forward.

‘Let’s do well.’

After silently repeating this brief but sincere resolution to myself.

I made my smile, which had been faint earlier, a bit deeper and.

Placed my right hand on the crown of Shizu’s head as she avoided my gaze.

The wounds I had suffered during today’s fierce battle with the Adorator had disappeared without a trace after just a few hours of sleep.

The signs of fatigue that had been etched on my face until I lay down in bed had also vanished completely, but.

I noticed during our brief conversation that her hair, one of the components that made up her beautiful appearance, still bore the traces of the fierce battle, remaining disheveled.

So I reached out with my right hand to groom her hair.

“Hng…!”

Her voice leaked out, filled with embarrassment at my sudden touch, as her flushed face showed no signs of cooling down, but.

“Your hair is messy, let me fix it for you.”

As I spoke in a low voice, I wasn’t just mindlessly stroking her head but actually grooming her disheveled hair with one hand.

“…Okay.”

After giving a brief response, Shizu forgot about trying to avoid my gaze.

“…”

She silently accepted my touch with her eyes closed.

…It’s a thought I had earlier too, but.

This sensation transmitted through my hand as I groomed her hair after such a long time was really similar to that.

Similar to what, you ask?

To petting a fairly large dog with fur similar to the color of her hair.

The way it wags its tail like a broom whenever it sees people because it’s so happy.

The way it extends its head when it sees a hand approaching, wanting to be petted quickly, and.

“…Hehe.”

The way Shizu is now making pleased sounds as I continue to groom her hair—there are so many similarities betwe—

“Cal, what are you thinking about?”

“…Just that I’m glad your hair looks nice and smooth now.”

“…I’ll believe you.”

Ahem, was it that obvious on my face?

I tried so hard not to think about it.

It seems I unconsciously made the same expression I make when petting a dog.

If this continued, I would likely make that expression again without realizing it while grooming her hair, but.

“…I think this part is tangled.”

Thanks to Shizu, who spoke to me while pointing at her hair with a gesture to keep me from falling into a trance, I didn’t have to worry about making strange expressions anymore.

As I groomed Shizu’s hair just before ending the day.

‘For a future where this precious person is happy.’

I once again firmly renewed in my heart the vow I had always made since my regression.

After the trajectory drawn by the holy sword passed through my body, which deserved righteous judgment for making the wrong choices.

In the final moment when I was about to turn to ashes and disappear.

Toward the mysterious light that rose from the pendant with the wish-granting ruby.

I wished not for my own wretched existence but for her happiness, and the meaning of this second life that began then.

Has become clearer as time passes.

That’s why I repeat this to myself.

Unlike when I first experienced the miracle of turning back time.

When I despaired upon finding myself returned to the most wretched moment of my short life.

Now I can’t express how fortunate I feel to have returned to that moment.

Not to my childhood before my relationship with her had even begun.

But to a critical juncture where everything could change with a single choice of mine.

The sense of accomplishment I feel when I face the results that change one by one due to my choices, and.

If you are by my side, smiling warmly at me.

Then any fear I might feel about living in a world that will eventually be reconstructed into a form I don’t recognize due to my choices doesn’t matter at all.

The night… is gradually deepening.

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As our bodies touched while I groomed her hair.

The tender feelings I already had for her deepened even more.

This seemed to be the same for Shizu, who had quietly accepted my touch.

“All done.”

As soon as I announced that the grooming was finished.

And my right hand left the crown of Shizu’s head.

She raised her head to meet my gaze, and her expression showed how the word “tenderness” could manifest in a person’s face.

“…Thank you.”

After saying only “sorry” to me throughout our time in the infirmary, words of gratitude finally came from her lips.

She looked quite beautiful even with the shadowed expression she had while apologizing.

But that beauty born from a shadowed expression, regardless of its intensity, was nothing compared to her radiance that bloomed like a flower in a field.

As we continued to express gratitude to each other, the moment I didn’t want to face finally arrived.

“It’s about… time to go, isn’t it?”

“It’s already gotten this late.”

Normally, when we spent time like this, the voice expressing regret about our time together ending would always come from my mouth first.

But today, her voice clearly conveyed that she was just as reluctant as I was for our time together to end.

In a situation like this, based on Shizu’s usual behavior, I expected her next action would be to whine and ask me not to leave, but.

“Thank you so much for staying with me. You must be tired, so get plenty of rest tonight.”

Contrary to my expectations, what came from her lips was a farewell filled with consideration for me, who had likely had just as exhausting a day as she had.

Perhaps because it was unexpected.

I had planned to pretend to give in if she whined for me to stay and spend a little more time with her.

But after receiving her warm farewell that included words of gratitude and consideration for me, staying any longer would make it seem like I was the one whining to her.

“It’s nothing, thank you for keeping me company when you must have been tired.”

I also expressed my gratitude to her as I stood up.

Everything that needed to be done was finished.

All that remained was to return to my quarters, lay my fatigued body on the bed, and get a good night’s sleep.

With the Subjugation Festival over.

The Cradle wouldn’t impose a tight schedule on its students, so today I could sleep in for the first time in a while….

“Cal, wait a moment.”

My thoughts about how to spend the rest of my schedule were interrupted by Shizu calling me in a careful voice.

Did she suddenly feel uncomfortable somewhere?

Worried, I turned my steps away from the infirmary exit and immediately approached Shizu.

“What’s wrong?”

When I spoke to her with a concerned expression.

“…There’s something I forgot to give you.”

Shizu, who was in my field of vision, met my gaze while speaking in a voice filled with embarrassment similar to before.

“…Something you forgot?”

As I heard her words, I tried to recall what I might have forgotten, but.

“Yes, something very important.”

Before I could express my confusion at her words, which had somehow shed their embarrassment and instead contained a playful tone.

Her upper body, which had been leaning against the bed, suddenly entered my personal space, and.

*Chu*

A sensation softer than anything else in the world that could be compared.

“…!!”

Was fully transmitted to my lips.

There was absolutely no need to question what this soft sensation was.

The identity of the soft touch that had just left my lips was obvious, and.

“…”

I brought my right hand to my lips with an expression so blank that I didn’t need a mirror to know how dazed I looked.

“…”

Shizu, whose expression had loosened slightly though less than mine, hid her faint blush with an awkward smile, then.

“How was… my gift?”

With an expression revealing slight tension, she asked for my thoughts on the gift she had just given me in a quiet voice filled with expectation.

A few days ago, on the morning of the second day of the Subjugation Festival, we had embraced and explored each other’s lips in the heat of the moment.

But the tenderness I felt now was incomparably more poignant than what I had felt then, piercing my heart.

“I liked it so much my heart almost stopped for a moment.”

What came from my mouth was the unvarnished truth without a trace of falsehood, and.

“I’m… I’m glad.”

Looking at Shizu, whose expression was finally tinged with relief after hearing my answer.

“Thanks for the gift. I’ll be going now.”

I maintained a deliberately calm voice as I waved goodbye and left the infirmary.

Just before leaving, I glanced quickly in her direction.

I could see her trying to calm her flushed face, slightly covered by both hands, one last time.

After struggling to open the infirmary door and stepping outside.

Despite the winter wind that had naturally grown fiercer as the night deepened, blowing strongly.

I placed my hand on my face, which showed no signs of cooling down, and.

“…I’m wide awake now.”

I shifted my steps toward the dormitory, feeling a tenderness that was beyond words.

Will I… be able to sleep tonight?

It seems like I might have to spend the night with my eyes open, unable to calm my racing heart even after lying in bed.

Regardless of my concerns, the moonlight illuminating the cloudless night sky was exceptionally bright, as it hadn’t snowed in quite some time.