Ch.147Apology (2)

“What?”

“I… I was wrong…”

Zernya grabbed my sleeve and clung to it.

“I, I’m a selfish bitch. I wanted to beat you, so I tried to do the opposite of what you said. I should have just accepted what I knew was right.”

I’m sorry.

I was wrong.

Please forgive me.

After that came a repetition of disjointed words.

I was quite surprised. I never expected to hear an apology from Zernya’s mouth. Nearly dying at the hands of a foreign god must have had a profound effect on her.

“I’m sorry. I was wrong. I promise I won’t do it again…”

“So what?”

“Huh?”

“What are you sorry for?”

Zernya’s face turned pale.

I asked again.

“What did you do wrong?”

I didn’t put force behind my voice. I spoke softly, like a parent soothing a child. Even so, Zernya’s body began to stiffen.

“When you apologize, you should say what you did wrong. If you just apologize like that, I can’t tell what you’re sorry for.”

“Ah, well.”

Zernya chewed on her words.

“S-sorry. I, I’ve never apologized before.”

Her face was red. Her lips, which had been trembling endlessly, began to move again after more than ten seconds had passed.

“For not listening to you properly this time, and for picking fights with you since we first met, and for showing off whenever I got the chance, and…”

“And?”

“And, um, also, also…”

After that, Zernya stumbled over her words several more times. During the buffering, she seemed to be retracing her memories. I waited patiently.

She displayed behaviors like rolling her eyeballs or twisting her hair as she recounted her wrongdoings one by one.

In truth, if she were to list everything, it would be endless. Including minor things, there would easily be thousands.

“Try to summarize everything you’ve said so far.”

Zernya was momentarily at a loss for words. But she was clever. It didn’t take her long to pinpoint the core issue.

“…Being arrogant.”

Arrogance. That’s the keyword of the Adelbein family chapter.

The Adelbeins were so great that they looked down on people outside their bloodline. They didn’t treat fellow humans as humans. That’s why they could unhesitatingly conduct human experiments.

“I acted like I was superior. In reality, we’re all just the same humans.”

Supremacism. Eugenics.

Zernya had been exposed to all sorts of bizarre behaviors based on these ideologies. She had been a victim until now. But she could have become a perpetrator at any time.

“You always told me. To live humbly. I heard the same thing from the avatars and constellations. All of this happened because I was arrogant. That’s, that’s why I almost died…”

Zernya was panting as she spoke.

“I, I’m an inadequate person. Actually, I can’t do anything without other people. Look at this. I can’t even knit this scarf properly without a tailor. But whenever I go to stores, I…”

The confession that followed didn’t just include apologies to me.

All the targets she had bullied until now. She was repenting to all of them.

“…It doesn’t matter anymore.”

Having finished her confession, Zernya collapsed onto the bed. She lifted her head. The IV drip was falling drop by drop.

“I won’t be able to leave here for a while, right?”

“You might not be able to leave until you die. We don’t know when the foreign god will return.”

“Ha, that might be good.”

The girl’s face contorted.

But she was smiling as if relieved. The dark circles characteristic of medical students were clearly visible.

“We weren’t really friends from the beginning, were we?”

“Why do you think that?”

“Well, I’ve only caused you all sorts of trouble until now, I…”

Zernya’s words couldn’t continue. Because I carefully embraced her.

Beep, beep, beep, beep.

The pulse monitor began to make urgent sounds. Zernya’s head, pressed against my chest, was trembling chaotically in sync with it.

“…That’s enough.”

I opened my mouth.

“If you’ve said that much, it’s enough.”

“…”

Zernya offered no resistance. She just occasionally flinched her shoulders.

I carefully patted her back. Her labored breathing gradually calmed down. The pulse monitor also became quieter.

The sound of her heartbeat reached me from close by. It was beating very clearly.

I carefully detached her and looked into her eyes.

“…Zernya, I’m sorry, but I have to fight against the Adelbeins. I can’t allow any more victims.”

“I know.”

“So I swear on the name of Rheinland. No matter what happens, I will guarantee your safety until the end.”

No, this resolution might not be enough. So I added:

“I can even stake all my research papers on it.”

“…What? Ahahahaha!”

Zernya, who had been listening to me blankly, burst into laughter.

What? Did I say something wrong?

After laughing for a while, Zernya said with a smile at the corner of her mouth:

“Yes, this is you. This is the person I know.”

“Don’t laugh. I’m serious. Do you even know how precious papers are to a scientist?”

“Eidel!”

Zernya called my name loudly.

“Stupid Eidel. Crazy Eidel. Eidel who made two professors file marriage papers just to do his research! You idiot vice president who can calculate the motion of black holes but can’t even approximate a woman’s heart!”

The next moment. Silver silk burrowed into my arms.

At the same time, I felt softness, squishiness, and warm comfort.

For a very brief moment, it felt so surreal that I wondered if it was a dream. But my vivid senses were telling me. This is actually happening right now.

Zernya slowly raised her head from my embrace.

“Thank you.”

It was like her usual self.

But it was an ephemeral, pure smile.

***

Thump, thump. Her heart was beating.

This heart wasn’t her own. It was a heart attached to Eidel as an external organ. If she hadn’t received a blood transfusion from him, the heart wouldn’t be beating.

Thump, thump, thump.

Medically, there was no abnormality to be found in this pounding.

Then the possibility lay elsewhere.

With her accumulated professional knowledge, Zernya could now be certain.

The process in the limbic system of the brain where phenylalanine undergoes decarboxylation to produce phenylethylamine.

Love.

Love is a terribly addictive drug. Once you get a taste, you can’t escape it easily. Even though you rationally know what it is, it keeps making you itch.

“Hoo, hoo.”

She buried her head deeper into Eidel. Then suddenly, ah, she pulled her head away. She got caught up in the mood. What right did she have?

“Zernya.”

Eidel was wearing a dumbfounded expression.

“Why are you suddenly acting like this?”

“Ah, I won’t tell you.”

Zernya grabbed her burning face and shook her head vigorously. To Eidel’s eyes, it looked like she was suffering from aftereffects of the foreign god’s attack.

That’s right. Zernya had fallen for the man in front of her.

Not just now.

Perhaps, little by little, knowingly or unknowingly, she had been falling for him for a while.

Her initial interest might have been due to his genius that surpassed her own. She lost in the mock exam, lost in the reassignment exam, lost in the midterm, and lost in the final exam.

Numerous defeats alone couldn’t be the reason for falling in love. If anything, they only fueled her competitive spirit.

The decisive factor must have been his humility and kindness.

Even when he did well on exams, he didn’t become arrogant. He knew how to consider others’ feelings before his own. That’s why he always had a word for Zernya, who came in second.

Saying she had worked hard.

It was the same after entering college. There was something he always said at the end of the day. Good job, today too. He never belittled others’ efforts.

There was a conversation they had once.

‘The world is all about being number one. The world only remembers the first place. Who remembers the person who came in second?’

‘The first place remembers the second place.’

At that time, she felt like she had been hit on the head with a tray.

‘I study to death because you study to death. When did I ever say studying is the easiest thing? Studying is fucking hard. People who say studying is easy haven’t done it properly. If they really did it right, they couldn’t say it’s easy.’

‘…’

Yes. She actually knew. Studying, sword training. It’s all difficult. When you climb a hill, you find a mountain, and when you climb a mountain, you find a mountain range.

‘When I see someone following me as I climb that mountain range, it gives me strength. It makes me understand a little bit why I need to climb that peak.’

Zernya nodded.

“Actually, I felt the same.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Just talking to myself.”

Zernya fiddled with her phone. Not a single text message. Even her parents, her own flesh and blood, didn’t ask about her well-being.

It was natural, if you think about it. If you’re of Adelbein blood, they would think you’d do well enough on your own.

No. It’s not natural.

In fact, she too wanted attention. She wanted to be fed with affection.

“Young master, Professor Feynman says to check the group DM.”

“Looks like something happened again. Zernya, I’ll be back shortly, so wait here quietly. Understand?”

Zernya silently nodded.

She couldn’t go out to the Spirit Realm in her current state anyway. If she went out, it would mean immediate death by the foreign god. She could still feel the mark on her.

There’s no choice.

For the time being, she had to let go of everything and take time for self-reflection.

***

“Was that matter handled well?”

“No problem, boss.”

Kashu von Adelbein downed his cold coffee in one shot. He groaned as he ran his hand through his hair.

Yes. In fact, he hadn’t died. He had staged his death with a body double. According to federal registration law, he was now a person who no longer existed in this world.

“What about the other bastards? Did you beat them up properly?”

“We’ve dealt with all related personnel except Director Angela Hueritia. It took a while to avoid the Heresset cops.”

“You should kill Hueritia, Hueritia!”

Kashu raised his voice as he threw his mug.

“That woman knows the recipe. If she blew the whistle on the artificial constellation project, it would be over. It would be a direct hit to the main family! Make her commit suicide, or disguise it as death by illness! Silence her somehow!”

“Boss, about that…”

“About what!”

“As it happens, she’s being detained in the Rheinland territory. Security is triple-layered like iron, so it’s not easy to sneak in.”

“Hmm.”

His head cooled down.

“Those Rheinland bastards, pretending to be unnecessarily upright, so annoying.”

“They’re a family where you can’t find even a speck of dust if you search, so what can we do?”

“Any good ideas?”

“I hear that Miss Zernya has a connection with the third son of the Rheinland direct line.”

Kashu clapped his hands.

“Ah, that guy! I wondered what their relationship was, but now I’m starting to get it.”

“Yes. So we just need to relay a message to Miss Zernya. Seduce the third son of Rheinland and secure a means to contact Director Hueritia without suspicion.”

“Hmm, yes. Can you take care of it?”

“No problem.”

Kashu didn’t particularly doubt it. Zernya is a direct descendant of the Adelbeins. She will soon rise to the greatest position in the greatest family, so why would she do anything harmful to the family?

“Whew. I hope this goes well.”

It was when Kashu was about to brew fresh coffee in a new mug.

“Hmm?”

A pure white feather fell on his head.