Ch.134Chapter 22. Hope (4)

Now that I think about it, I seem to be someone who feels awkwardness incredibly well.

Well, it’s not like I was particularly sociable to begin with.

Basically, I’m the type who doesn’t speak first until others speak to me. When I was very young, around elementary school age in my past life, I don’t think I was like that, but as I grew older, my personality gradually changed until I became that way by college.

I don’t want to blame others for it. There must be various mixed reasons. Above all, I myself came to not want to get entangled with other people.

The reason I got involved with Jihye in this world was because she spoke to me first.

Even when I was being incredibly annoying and causing all sorts of conflicts, Jihye approached me with her characteristic innocence. She eventually broke down my barriers and came to my side.

Looking back, I was just a bad person.

I might not particularly like children, but that doesn’t mean I should be the first to get annoyed.

I was lacking in many ways, but Jihye truly thought of me as a sister. To be honest, I still don’t know why.

I just want to repay her as much as she likes me.

“……”

But regardless of those thoughts, it’s awkward.

Come to think of it, it’s been a really long time since we’ve been alone in a room together. I thought it wouldn’t be awkward to go back to that lifestyle since that’s how we used to live.

Wanting to reduce some of that awkwardness, I looked at the CD case on the desk.

I checked it last time too, but it was still broken in various places. Many of the CDs inside had scratches. Most of them probably wouldn’t have major issues with playback, though.

Jihye had restored our room, which had been in complete disarray, back to its original state. And she had been waiting for me to return.

“Hmm… the desk has gotten quite cluttered.”

I said that for no particular reason.

Besides the broken stereo, there were various pieces of equipment on the desk. The former chairman of Noir Corporation apparently didn’t feel the need to take these back.

“Should I clean it up?”

Jihye asked.

I shook my head.

“No. If they need it, they’ll come and take it themselves.”

I’m not sure if I’ll need it either, but I’ll leave it as is for now.

Scratching my head, I put my hand on the CD player.

Click.

“Huh?”

Jihye, who had somehow approached right next to me, made a slightly surprised sound.

The CD player was working properly. It extended its CD tray forward like sticking out a tongue, waiting for me to insert a CD.

“It was broken.”

According to Jihye, it broke when the orphanage was attacked. That’s how I remembered it too. The CDs and the devices to play them were all scattered on the floor, and they didn’t seem like they would work properly again.

“…Oh, is that so?”

“Huh?”

“I guess James or Cherry must have fixed it.”

Those two left before the magical girls departed. Cherry received an urgent request from the Federation to return quickly, and James… I’m not sure where he disappeared to. He just left saying he was going.

I scratched my head and picked up one of the CDs. The case was an ordinary plastic case. The album cover had quite a vintage design, with a drawing that looked like it had been scribbled with a pen.

Originally it wasn’t even used, but a new product that had been reprinted not long ago, but it had a large crack in the front from rolling on the ground.

Fortunately, the CD was intact.

I took out the CD and put it in the player, and soon the device read the CD and the music started playing automatically.

The music that flowed out was an upbeat jazz piece. It seemed to be a live recording rather than a studio one, as you could hear the sounds of people moving mixed in slightly.

I don’t know the title or the performer. I’m not even sure how famous this album is. It might actually be a relatively recent album with just a vintage-looking cover.

But still, the music was good.

I leaned against the desk. Jihye leaned against it next to me.

We both pretended to be cool for a moment, nodding our heads to the music.

“…This situation.”

After listening to the upbeat music for a while, Jihye spoke first.

“Doesn’t it feel like a movie?”

“Does it?”

Well, thinking about it, maybe it does a little. I’m not sure. I didn’t watch movies very often in this world. Besides, I preferred Hollywood action movies with lots of destruction and demolition over musical films.

But still, I think I understand what Jihye means by “like a movie.”

“Then, how about making it more like a movie?”

“Huh?”

I got up from my seat and twirled my body once to the music.

I don’t usually dance. My personality isn’t that upbeat.

But, whatever.

The person who knows my “different side” best is right next to me.

Not knowing how to dance properly and moving randomly, I bowed toward Jihye.

And extended my hand forward.

Jihye took my hand with an incredulous smile.

I pulled Jihye’s hand, and she willingly let herself be pulled toward me.

We held hands like that and swayed our bodies roughly while spinning around the room.

I’m not sure why I suddenly acted this way.

But—

Even people who don’t usually do this kind of thing can completely transform when they go to places like karaoke, right?

Even the most reserved person sometimes needs to blow off steam.

What I felt as we spun around was a sense of liberation.

The feeling of finally being able to distance myself from all those complicated matters.

Jihye laughed. I laughed too, watching her.

Finally, finally I’ve returned.

To the everyday life I wanted.

I know that not everything is completely over yet. And that the everyday life I had in mind has probably changed forever.

But for now, this is excellent. Yes, excellent enough to celebrate by dancing.

I can guarantee that Jihye doesn’t know how to dance any more than I do.

So there was nothing to be embarrassed about.

*

After spinning around ridiculously until the album was almost over, we both flopped down on the floor.

The CD player that had finished playback stopped the music. For a while, there was a whirring sound of the CD spinning, and then even that sound stopped.

We lay sprawled on the floor, catching our breath for a while.

“Yeah, that was a bit like a movie.”

Jihye muttered as if she found it ridiculous too.

“……”

I silently breathed while staring at the ceiling.

After being quiet for a while, Jihye suddenly turned her head toward me and asked.

“You were thinking about Hayun, weren’t you?”

“What? No.”

I immediately denied it.

Jihye turned her body completely toward me and lay down. Then she slowly crept closer to me.

I also turned toward Jihye, but I didn’t get close to her and slowly backed away.

“Why are you running away? You hugged me so tightly last time.”

“No, that was—”

“I guess you don’t need me anymore. I understand.”

“I never thought that way!”

“You slept so close to me when we were with the kids.”

“That was because there wasn’t enough space…”

“Hmm.”

Jihye narrowed her eyes and snorted at my continuing excuses.

“So, you have no intention of sleeping close to me unless there’s not enough space?”

“Of course that’s not it.”

“Then there’s no need to run away.”

Thud.

As I was backing away, my backside finally hit the wall and stopped, and Jihye kept approaching.

Jihye is shorter than me. She’s probably similar to Hayun. When we face each other, Jihye definitely looks up at me.

But such height differences become meaningless when we lie down facing each other. Because we can meet each other’s gaze.

Jihye, with incredible boldness, pulled my left arm toward her and stretched it out.

And she lay down using my arm as a pillow.

Thanks to that, the somewhat pressuring gaze lowered a bit, but her eyes were still blazing.

“Remember? I kissed you.”

“…How could I forget?”

“And normally, people don’t kiss someone they don’t like.”

“…You could if you were performing CPR.”

“That step was skipped. These days, you just press on the chest, right?”

Is that so?

Wait, that seems a bit different from what I meant.

I brought up CPR just because the situation was that dangerous… something like that.

…

No, I’m just running away again.

“So…”

“That’s right.”

Jihye looked up at me from within my arms and said firmly.

“If I didn’t like you in the first place, I wouldn’t have kissed you.”

I seriously considered what to say in response to that.

“As expected, you can’t answer right away.”

Jihye muttered, looking up at me.

“I’m sor—”

Before I could say “sorry,”

My mouth was blocked by Jihye’s lips.

Since I had opened my mouth to speak, I was more vulnerable to such an attack.

But at least this time I managed not to make an embarrassing sound like “mmph!?”

Besides, midway through—

“Mmph!?”

Jihye made such a sound.

When I was attacked last time, I was too surprised to do anything, but not this time. I hugged Jihye more tightly and then firmly pressed the back of her head.

Jihye didn’t run away but rather hugged me tighter.

Just like Hayun did to me, our bodies pressed together—

With a “puha,” we separated slightly, without either of us taking the lead. We were both breathing much more heavily than when we had been dancing earlier.

Jihye quietly looked up at me for a while. My face was reflected in those emerald eyes.

They were always clear and pure eyes.

Her cheeks were slightly flushed, and her skin was damp with sweat.

“…When did you learn to do that?”

When I asked incredulously, Jihye snorted and said,

“You’re the strange one. People our age usually watch all sorts of intense videos and stuff.”

Is that how it works?

No, more importantly, she watched intense videos? Really? I never noticed any signs of that.

On the contrary, I was very… careful. No matter what, since my soul retained all the memories of my past life, I couldn’t help but be more cautious.

Somehow I feel strangely wronged.

“Well, considering how innocent you are, I won’t pounce on you while you’re sleeping.”

That comment honestly stung a bit.

Of course, I had never dated in my past life… and it’s not like we’re in the Joseon Dynasty; it’s not strange for women to be assertive in this world, but still, it stings.

But I was still hesitant to immediately rush in for a kiss.

It’s not that I dislike Jihye, nor do I feel repulsed by such acts. Heavens, there’s no reason to dislike it.

However—

“You’re so indecisive.”

Jihye criticized me like that.

But her body showed no intention of moving away.

“Well, even if you’re indecisive… I guess I shouldn’t be the one to talk. I also kept putting it off until we got to this point.”

Jihye quietly looked up at me.

“But don’t apologize for that. It makes me feel bad.”

“I see.”

I nodded.

Indeed, apologizing for such things only conveys rejection.

“…Is it because of Hayun?”

There are various reasons. Jihye probably knows that too. It’s just that bringing up another reason in this situation feels somewhat awkward.

Thinking about it this way, I really do seem like a bad person.

No, it’s not like I wanted things to be this way… but it’s also strange to say I don’t want it. Right? In many ways, who hasn’t had those kinds of thoughts?

Jihye buried her face in my chest.

After being lost in thought for a while, she released her arms from my body.

“Ah.”

Whether from disappointment or concern, such a sound escaped from my mouth, but Jihye didn’t seem to care much.

It seems like she never even considered the concept of “giving up.”

“…Alright.”

Jihye nodded and said.

“Then, let’s go together.”

“Go where?”

“To Hayun’s place. Aren’t you worried?”

“……”

“I don’t know what her family situation is like, but they’re probably much stricter than us.”

Making a comment that might be a joke or not, Jihye opened the window wide.

“Wait, that way?”

When I asked incredulously, Jihye shrugged and said,

“We’re magical girls. Spreading dreams and hope… Above all, I honestly like flying. Maybe it’s because I haven’t been a magical girl for long? Besides, you’re the one who made me a magical girl.”

Jihye showed me her circuit, which she had picked up at some point, and said,

“This runs on love, right? I feel like I have enough energy, how about you?”

“……”

After being dazed for a moment, I finally got up, pretending to give in.

Well, I was worried.

Hayun is probably getting scolded by her parents and feeling down.

It’s not good for a magical girl who saved the world to be like that.

“Alright, let’s go.”

I said that as I picked up the circuit that was on the desk.

And I put it on my wrist.

Seeing it shine brightly, it didn’t seem like it would lack energy.