Ch.12541. That is Arrogance.(2)

“I want to be like you.”

Sitting in an old wooden chair with her head raised, the child stared directly at Kariel, almost glaring, as she expressed this ambition.

“That’s a rash decision.”

Kariel.

He remained unmoved by the child’s rudeness, boldness, or audacity.

“I barely know myself, so what does it mean to want to be like me?”

“Why don’t you know yourself?”

Her language and expression are rough.

Sharp-edged.

Probably because the language she normally uses is limited to such terms.

One who has inherently spoken refined words, precious words, sophisticated words.

Courtesy and etiquette. The rich insight of one who has experienced various encounters and accessed countless knowledge and information.

And the insight and perspective of a child who has had to fight for survival in back alleys all her life, sharpening her edges without exchange or harmony, battling filth and garbage, rats and cats and wild dogs.

Born the same and even sharing the same world.

Yet they live in different realms with every moment they grow.

The high grow higher.

The low sink lower.

“You said you want to be like me? What part of me made you think that?”

Kariel deliberately avoided choosing difficult or archaic words.

The local language was somewhat unfamiliar to him, but… that would be resolved in a few days.

He had an unusually quick understanding when it came to languages.

“I don’t want to hurt. I don’t want to lose things. The strength not to run away. The power to defeat nobles.”

Thanks to being washed and dressed, albeit simply, before coming here, unlike earlier, all the stench and filth had been removed.

But her temperament remained.

Restlessly shaking her body, her gaze wandering here and there, waving her hands, trembling her legs.

The anxiety etched into her instincts still had her scanning her surroundings as if preparing for any possible situation, her shoulders tensed up.

Unkempt, rough hair.

Through the faded yellowish-brown bangs, intensely burning vermilion eyes.

They were like the setting sun, yet unlike the fading sun’s wistfulness, they emitted intense emotions and colors.

On her parched, chapped lips, there remained minute flakes of dead skin and dried blood scabs that hadn’t been removed despite washing.

“You want power? Then what would you do with that power once you have it?”

“I’ll beat the hell out of anyone who messes with me.”

Concise.

“Beat, beat them up but not actually kill them.”

“You want to hit them?”

“Yeah. That.”

The child agreed with a threatening expression, making hitting gestures.

“Why do you want to hit them?”

“Because they hit me.”

A simple reason.

“Is that all? What comes after that?”

“After? After?”

The child pondered.

“I want to eat a lot and sleep well.”

It might seem like nothing special.

Someone who didn’t understand might think it trivial.

But.

“…Yes. That’s important.”

For those who constantly go hungry, this is a crucial matter of survival.

And that desire to sleep well.

…Not having to sleep with vigilance or wariness, forced into light sleep.

The longing to stretch out arms and legs comfortably and sleep deeply with peace of mind.

…And if the floor could be a little less cold, and if there could be a fire to keep warm while sleeping, that would be even better.

“If you could eat your fill every day. And if you had a comfortable place to sleep. What then?”

“…Isn’t that enough?”

Her expression crumpled as if to say, what more could one ask for?

That attitude wasn’t rejection or denial.

She simply hadn’t had the luxury to think beyond that.

In other words, she thought that would be sufficient.

And once all that was provided.

Only then could she move on to stages like future, hope, dreams, and so on.

“…I suppose so.”

In a suffocating life.

What had Kariel himself wished for?

Just to not think about anything.

Without having to be mindful of others.

Quietly.

…He just wanted to breathe.

With peace of mind.

His small appetite was because his hunger had diminished, and eating too much would make him vomit, so Kariel himself had limited his meals to the minimum.

He was accustomed to asceticism and control.

Still, since his body needed to move, he ate just the bare minimum.

Even that—eating too much made his body sluggish, heavy, and drowsy.

In a life where he needed to respond nimbly, that would bring another discomfort and awkwardness.

However.

It was clear that his situation had been better than the child before him.

My hell and this child’s hell are not equal.

And to forcibly equate them, to pretend to sympathize or empathize while offering comfort with pity would be…

…equally arrogant.

A deception named compassion.

Self-deception.

If that deepens, one becomes intoxicated with the role-play.

That life would be stained with hypocrisy and deception.

Then, is that…

Is this evil?

“……”

Mineth, watching Kariel and the child from a few steps away, was also contemplating some of the same thoughts Kariel had.

Though she had been selfish.

The “constraints” placed upon her made it impossible not to think about such things.

In the past.

And in the present.

“Nothing in this world is free.”

Even those who give, those who donate, ultimately do so because they expect something in return.

Some follow religious teachings.

Some do it for self-satisfaction.

Some for reputation and fame.

And there are many other reasons.

To truly, purely give out of empathy and pain for another’s hardship and suffering…

…is that really an easy thing?

And will that consideration truly help them?

By helping, expectations are created, and when those expectations aren’t met later, betrayal is felt.

The weak and destitute will come to resent.

There might be some who don’t.

But can we say there are none who do?

Even while being moved by the grace given.

Once that moment passes, the cold and hunger, the pain and hardship return.

And then they inevitably recall.

That warmth from before.

The grace. The gratitude.

But.

The sorrow that comes when that vague hope, that needless expectation, isn’t fulfilled.

It’s another kind of pain.

“……”

Kariel himself had similar experiences.

Someone who, unable to watch him being bullied and humiliated, had once tried to stop it.

But when that same person later ignored it or even joined in.

Kariel came to hate even the consideration that person had shown in the past.

…Though that was then and this is now.

Why did he hate it at the time?

The reason was simple.

…Because he had expectations.

That they would take his side again.

They should have.

So why, this time, even you…?

Why did he come to hate his father and mother?

He’s my father.

She’s my mother.

…Why, while being so devoted to others.

Why not to me…?

“……”

The reason he couldn’t bring himself to touch a dying stray cat.

Hesitating, deliberately passing by while regretting, yet.

Still not turning back.

Even if I intervene, and by some miracle the child survives.

…What then?

Still.

In the end, he went back and reached out belatedly.

But it died.

It had grown cold.

The faintly moving belly, the chest…

No longer moved.

“If I give you food and a place to sleep, what can you do in return?”

“Umm.”

The child contemplates.

“I can do what I’m told.”

“What if I tell you to go out and kill monsters?”

“…Teach me how to kill them. Give me weapons that can kill them. Then I can do it.”

…She’s not completely without sense.

Quick-witted too.

Within the limits of what she could express, she requested the most appropriate compromise.

Without insisting she could do impossible things or forcing false enthusiasm.

She made a reasonable request.

But who decides whether to grant it?

“What if I don’t teach you how or give you weapons, but still tell you to do it?”

“I can’t.”

Resolute.

“If I could do that, I wouldn’t be living here. Why would I hide and live in this hellish place?”

Living in hiding despite it being hell.

What a curious expression.

“I see.”

Kariel spoke toward Mineth.

“Tell Venus to take care of this child for a while.”

“Venus?”

“…She’s probably just training on her own with nothing else to do anyway. Two birds with one stone.”

Kariel looked at the child again.

“Keep thinking. About what you can do. What you should do. How you can change your current life. Think and think again.”

Otherwise.

“If you don’t live according to your thoughts, you’ll end up thinking according to how you live.”

A life where you accept things as they come, swayed and biased by whatever thoughts arise.

“…How is that different from a bird in a cage?”

A bird that realizes it’s trapped and knows it must break the egg.

And a bird that thinks the egg is all there is.

Their circumstances…

Their present and future will be absolutely different.

“…??”

The child frowned intensely as if struggling to understand.

But Kariel quietly gave Mineth a glance.

“Let’s go, Del.”

At Mineth’s coaxing, the girl called Del obediently followed her out of the room.

“……”

Del, is it.

Like anyone else, that child’s future was certainly not ordinary.

If she integrated into the Relief Knight Order, she would grow to succeed Venus.

And even after leaving the Order’s command, wherever she went, she would be capable of handling her share.

However, he didn’t predict that future specifically.

To avoid prejudice or getting entangled in it.

Peeking is ultimately a double-edged sword.

Kariel had no intention of following in the footsteps of Grandeus, Rupert, and the many prophets of the world.

So he judged and pondered only what he could see.

Only within the scope that anyone could.

“……”

Nevertheless.

Though the probability had greatly decreased.

It was still that child who would burn this city-kingdom.

And now, beyond burning… she had reached the point of toppling the royal palace and publicly executing the noble bloodlines.

Was it because she had the conditions to become not just a rioter but a rebel… now a revolutionary leader?

-If those at the top are corrupt and live as they please, they should be prepared to be stabbed by the swords of those below.

The Demon King snickered, pointing out that Kariel’s worry was useless, meaningless meddling.

-When a minority of the strong oppresses and squeezes a majority of the weak, the weak will rise up to survive, right? It’s the fault of those who couldn’t suppress and manage that, so why are you worried about it?

Or else.

-Why don’t you just execute all the higher-ups, cut off their heads, sit at the top, and change things yourself?

“I have no reason to do that.”

I had no intention of usurping someone’s power.

Much less any reason to slaughter existing power holders in the name of normalizing a disordered country.

“You said yourself that if I intervened in everything that bothered me, my body wouldn’t last, didn’t you?”

-And who was it that justified their intervention by saying it caught their eye?

His mocking snicker like an unpleasant character… still stirred something inside.

Somehow, even as emotions fade, this doesn’t change.

“I’m going to leave anyway, aren’t I?”

At most a week.

Or even sooner.

“……”

However.

Having intervened, at least to the extent of cleaning up.

It would be right to take responsibility.

If one didn’t know the consequences of their actions, that would be different.

Would anyone feel sorry for an ant they didn’t know they stepped on?

If you turn a blind eye, it’s all unknown. Things to pass by without a second thought.

But for the ant crushed under a giant’s foot, for the flowers and weeds trampled.

…All of these are matters directly linked to survival.

How the ripples caused by Kariel saving the child named Del would spread.

…And observing and examining this would also be a good opportunity to test how to use the power and insight he had gained.

-That’s what you want to think. Your meddling, then and now.

“……”

What do you want me to do?

I gained power for this very purpose.

If gaining power brings constraints and makes the body sluggish.

…What meaning does that have?

A sword exists to be swung and thrust.

…While I don’t deny its use as a decorative item or symbol.

The tool I needed wasn’t that kind of ornament.

“…How absurd.”

The reason I sought power, as I recall, wasn’t to rescue, save, or help others.

Who truly is the foolish and stupid one here?