Ch.11After All That Preparation…

“Hehe! Shinwoo, look at me! I’m a Hunter now too!”

The year I turned twelve.

I became the world’s youngest Hunter, praised as Korea’s greatest talent of all time.

It was news that made headlines everywhere, but I still wanted to brag about it, so I immediately told my only friend.

“Yeah. Congratulations, Sophia.”

“…!”

Of course, he was happy for me.

That night, my home was especially harmonious.

I had achieved my dream, received praise from my father, and above all, taken the first step toward becoming stronger like my mother whom I admired.

I felt like I could fly.

But the child’s fantasy was soon shattered miserably.

“S-Sophia! Where are you going?!”

“Stay away! Get back!”

Fear of monsters?

Injuries sustained in the field?

Those were things that someone born with Hunter qualities should naturally endure.

But there was something I simply couldn’t bear.

Something that made me think having my limbs torn off by monsters would be preferable.

It was the reality of having to interact with other people to hunt monsters.

Having to mingle with humans whenever there was a mission was truly torturous.

It felt like walking naked through a foul-smelling cesspool endlessly.

“Uweeeeeeek-!”

So.

I thought I would get used to it eventually.

The year I turned fourteen.

Unable to endure my instincts any longer, I finally vomited and collapsed during a monster subjugation.

A genius among geniuses who grew to D-rank Hunter in just two years despite being a Beast Hunter who didn’t control monsters.

It was the moment when such a genius’s star fell.

If the danger level of the monster that appeared that day had been even slightly higher, there might have been casualties.

“Sob… sob…!”

That night, I didn’t leave my room.

I cried and cried and cried some more.

My father, who had the same Beast Hunter traits as me, could act normally in front of ordinary people. He could live in that filthy cesspool without changing his expression.

‘Why can’t I do the same…?’

There was one thing I realized when I witnessed the “Smiling Monster Incident” in Busan four years ago.

That if I didn’t become stronger, I couldn’t protect what was precious to me.

That in truly urgent situations, I could only protect what was mine with my own strength.

Seeing my father’s profile when he almost lost my mother that day, fearing that might be me about to lose Shinwoo.

To shake off that fear, I worked so hard to become strong like my mother whom I admired.

“Someone… help me…”

But this was ultimately a problem I had to solve alone.

The thought of having to live again in that cesspool-like reality, fearing the daily routine that would repeat itself.

“Urp?!”

Just as I was about to retch again.

“Are you having a hard time?”

Unlike me, an ordinary human.

Shinwoo, who was still living a normal life attending middle school.

As soon as I saw him who had somehow entered my room, I was so happy and missed him so much that I immediately hugged him.

And strangely, beside him, I could pour out all the knots in my heart that I couldn’t tell even my parents.

“…so being around people is hard for me.”

“I see.”

“W-what should I do? I want to keep being a Hunter. I want to become as strong as my parents! Someday I want to be a National Authority-Level Hunter like my mother…”

Feeling wronged, frustrated, and exhausted, I unconsciously leaned my head on his shoulder and cried again.

Far from pushing away my heavy head, Shinwoo stroked it and comforted me.

I felt my face growing strangely hot.

For Shinwoo’s sake too, I absolutely had to become at least a National Authority-Level Hunter.

But could I really do that?

“Then let’s do this.”

Just as my resolve was about to crumble.

“I was planning to become a Hunter too.”

Had my prayers reached heaven?

“When we both become Hunters, we can work as a pair, and Sophia, you’ll only have to be with me. Isn’t that right?”

“C-can we really do that…?”

“Yes. We can.”

When I first heard those words, I truly thought my heart would stop.

My breathing quickened, and my body, which had felt constantly dirty, felt completely purified in an instant.

The saying “Even rolling in a field of dog poop is better than dying” must surely be meant for moments like this.

So because I didn’t want to miss this opportunity at all.

“T-then promise me…”

Wanting reassurance, I carefully extended my pinky finger to Shinwoo.

“Yes. I will.”

Without hesitation, Shinwoo wrapped his pinky around mine and made a firm promise.

“I’m not as amazing as Sophia, so I’ll take the Hunter exam the regular way in my final year of high school and definitely become a Hunter.”

“Yes! Then by that time, I’ll become super strong! I’ll be the best partner for Shinwoo!”

And to do that, I needed a lot of preparation.

“Hasn’t Sophia changed recently?”

“Yes, that’s right. Now she smiles and responds well even when spoken to.”

“She even ate with us the other day.”

To avoid being an inadequate partner for Shinwoo.

“Everyone, thank you for your cooperation today as well.”

I would smile in front of people until my facial muscles cramped, always showing a likable face.

“Uweeeeeeek-!”

On such days, I would secretly vomit into the toilet at night, but even so, I was happy.

“J-just… a little more… to endure!”

Because this hellish daily life would end in a few years.

Until then, all I needed was overwhelming skill to handle everything in our two-person team by myself.

Shinwoo just needed to be by my side.

Just standing still at the scene would be enough.

Three years later.

“I’ll be going then!”

I hoped to advance to the United States where the Hunter Association headquarters was located to gain more strength.

“Uweeeeeeek!!”

In that distant land where I couldn’t even see my family, my hatred for humans reached its peak without my sanctuary, leading to depression treatment and self-harm habits.

“The US Hunter Association Headquarters highly values the skills of Korean Hunter Sophia and awards her a B-rank Hunter license.”

*Clap clap clap clap*

A B-rank Hunter license that allowed me to choose and hire my own partner rather than being forcibly assigned by a higher-ranked Hunter.

Of course, I vomited everything in my stomach that day too because I had to stand on a platform full of people.

But.

“Finally… I got it!”

At last, all preparations were complete.

It was the moment when the fruits of my two years of endurance in America bore sweet results.

Throwing all the recommendations from high-ranking officials into the trash.

That night, I immediately took a dawn flight to Korea.

I couldn’t sleep due to excitement, and my lower body felt hot thinking about the happy future ahead.

‘Finally… I can meet you again.’

Han Shinwoo.

Being separated for two years made me realize it more clearly.

That I was a woman who couldn’t do anything without Shinwoo.

That Shinwoo was the light guiding me in my world until the moment I died.

‘You just need to stay by my side. You don’t have to fight, you don’t have to do dangerous things, just look at me and that’s enough…’

I was certain he would make me stronger than any Commander Hunter’s buff could.

After running through that hellish path of thorns, I finally reached the destination.

In front of the entrance to Incheon International Airport.

Sophia, who had been full of smiles, now realized that the higher you are, the more painful the fall, as she tasted the feeling of hope turning into despair.

“You… failed the Hunter exam…?”

“……Yes.”

My mind went blank.

My parents were saying something around me, but I couldn’t hear their voices properly.

The inside of my wrist was itchy.

I shouldn’t do it.

It’s a bad habit.

I wanted to scratch it until I tore it apart with my fingernails until blood flowed freely.

Even though it was somewhat expected.

Even though I should know that becoming a Hunter isn’t an easy thing.

The promise that day might have been one Shinwoo made forcibly to comfort me.

I should have encouraged Shinwoo who had failed the exam for my sake.

That would have been the right thing to do.

But it seems I was too selfish a woman for that.

Thinking that all those years I’d spent managing my image unlike a typical Beast Hunter had been in vain for that promise.

“…Liar.”

My mouth moved before my brain.

My emotions collapsed in anger, resentment, frustration, and sadness, unable to find direction.

“You said you’d always be by my side. So why are you so weak?”

Harsh words spilled from my mouth as I cried angrily.

“I hate someone like you.”

When in fact I loved him to death.

“Get lost. You liar.”

For your sake, Shinwoo, even if I had to retch in disgust behind people’s backs for the rest of my life.

Even though I could play the role of a lovable partner who could act like a friendly neighbor anywhere.

Losing control of my emotions, I shouted loudly, only coming to my senses too late.

Facing Shinwoo directly…

“I’m sorry, Sophia.”

Despite my harsh words, he was rather sheepishly blaming himself.

But no matter how I looked at it, I was clearly the bad one.

“…! I-I’m sorry!”

“Sophia!”

I ran past my family and fled outside the airport.

And that night, unable to go home, I just had to sleep at the Shilla Hotel.