Ch.1163Ask Me Anything

First question.

“Why did you bestow the stigmata upon me? If you needed a saint, wouldn’t it have been better to choose someone more devout?”

“It was necessary. That was the only way to suppress Vanirgand’s growing influence.”

“Hmm. So it wasn’t because you approved of my conduct after all.”

I wondered why she bestowed the stigmata on someone like me who didn’t have even a fragment of faith, and it turns out it wasn’t selection but a preventive measure. I kind of suspected as much.

Then she must have had quite a few complaints about my conduct itself…

“Well… it wasn’t all that bad. Let’s say you barely passed.”

…Oh, really?

For someone chosen out of necessity rather than preference, that’s surprisingly decent feedback.

So while my lack of faith and irreverence were displeasing, my conduct itself was passable enough. Is that it?

“However… I didn’t expect you to pray daily, but wouldn’t it have been proper for a saint to at least set foot in church once a week?”

It seems she was quite displeased that I never set foot in church normally and only sneakily visited when I had important business…

“…That’s because. I couldn’t bring myself to visit when I knew it would cause a commotion like this time.”

If that bothered you so much, you shouldn’t have fed me trouble with brilliant pillars of light every time I visited the church.

“I had my reasons. If you had shown your face more often, I wouldn’t have given you such a grand welcome.”

So it was indeed punishment for my perceived insolence.

Since it was impossible for her to smite me due to her circumstances, she at least wanted to make me suffer a little.

“Hmm… it seems to have backfired though.”

If she hadn’t done that, I might have visited occasionally. Not weekly, of course, but very occasionally.

In the end, being half-ignored by her own saint was Astraea’s own doing.

…By that logic, wasn’t my suffering also self-inflicted?

You don’t understand. The root of all these problems is that you conscripted someone who never intended to become a saint in the first place.

So the term “self-inflicted” should rightfully apply not to me, but to the ascended gods who provided the fundamental cause.

Don’t you agree?

—-

Second question.

“When I fought Amitamir, you bestowed some unknown blessing on me. What exactly was that blessing?”

The blessing Astraea bestowed by allocating a significant portion of her divinity.

I had a rough sense of what kind of blessing it was, but I wanted to get a clear explanation from the source herself.

“I forcibly maximized your physical capabilities to their limits. You essentially obtained the prime physical condition that would normally be achieved through extreme training and smooth growth, but much earlier.”

As expected. The effect itself was as I thought. Then…

“Are there side effects?”

“None. There are issues like sensory misalignment due to rapid growth and shortened lifespan due to physical strain… but neither applies to you.”

I asked because such a powerful blessing would surely have some side effects, but Astraea definitively stated there were none.

The sensory issue wasn’t a problem since I adapted immediately, and losing a few decades of lifespan is insignificant once you’ve awakened divinity.

Valenstein, who threw away everything and even allied with a witch because those few decades weren’t enough, would shed tears of envy if he heard this.

Well, he seems to be living a satisfying new life now, so I suppose it doesn’t matter.

‘But if those are the only two side effects…’

I glanced down at the area below my collarbone.

Despite the compression of the leather armor and bandages covering my upper body, two masses of flesh jutted out prominently, boasting overwhelming weight and volume.

…I thought this was a side effect or Astraea’s mischief, but it turns out Hersella’s body was naturally capable of growing this large.

A rather unwelcome truth.

—-

“I’m currently coexisting with the original owner of this body, right? Although I’m practically monopolizing it… anyway, is there no way to separate us?”

The third question was more for Hersella than for me.

I promised her when we first spoke. Instead of fighting each other and helping each other, I would definitely look for a way to separate from the body I had unwillingly taken.

At that time, it was just empty words I had no intention of keeping, but perhaps I’ve grown fond of her after our long time together.

Now I’ve become more generous, and I don’t think it would be so bad to grant her request as long as she doesn’t cause trouble after we separate.

Of course, even if separation is possible, it would be difficult right now given the circumstances, so we’d have to postpone it until everything is over… but it would be good to at least know the method, right?

“That… would be difficult.”

But contrary to my intentions, Astraea didn’t give a satisfactory answer.

Or perhaps she couldn’t give one?

“Your soul has already completely settled in that body and is half-fused and mixed with the soul of the Heavenly Evil Star. Separating souls in such a state without causing damage is… not easy even for us.”

“Not easy means there is a way, right?”

“It’s not impossible. If you really want to know… I can tell you.”

Astraea frowned slightly and sighed lightly, seemingly reluctant, then opened her mouth again to explain the method.

“You die.”

“What?”

“When you face death, the soul naturally leaves the body, and consequently, the souls that are fused through the medium of the body will naturally separate.”

Wait, what is that? Are you saying commit suicide if you want independence? That’s… a method I can’t dare attempt even knowing it.

That’s not separation, it’s more like disposal. It doesn’t just end with splitting into two, but being thrown into the afterlife in that separated state.

“…Is there no other way?”

“Well… if you were subjected to an ability that destroys or seals souls, only one would remain. I don’t know of any other method.”

“Hmm…”

There really isn’t a proper method. So in the end, for us to separate, one of us must definitely die?

I should give up.

This was essentially the same as having no method at all. I couldn’t possibly undertake such madness as a solution.

Hersella herself wasn’t invited to this mental space so she probably didn’t hear, but if she had, she would have also told me not to do anything crazy.

…She would, right? Probably?

She wouldn’t gleefully try to eliminate just my soul now that she finally knows a method… right?

No way.

Given the friendship we’ve built over time, she surely wouldn’t betray me without hesitation.

I believe in you, Hersella.

—-

“So there’s no other way except for one of us to die… I’ll have to give up then.”

“Even if it were possible, you shouldn’t even attempt it.”

Astraea declared, as if telling me not to entertain foolish thoughts.

“Your spirit and body barely exist under a delicate and precarious balance, so if one pillar is removed, it will naturally collapse.”

“You mean even if one survives, they won’t last long?”

“That’s right.”

Astraea nodded and provided a more detailed explanation.

If I disappeared and Hersella reclaimed her body, she would be immediately devoured by the liberated Vanirgand.

She would resist desperately, but since the Heavenly Evil Star was born as prey for Vanirgand in the first place, she wouldn’t be able to hold out for long.

Conversely, if only I survived, my divinity would recognize this body as part of the evil god—like a piece of his flesh—and rebel, resulting in my power destroying my own body.

In other words, we must continue to coexist as we do now, protecting and supporting each other.

Unless Vanirgand, the source of all problems related to this body, completely disappears from this world.

—-

Fourth question.

“I understand that Alfodhr and Feirius are enemies… so what should I do now? Is there any way to know where they are and what they’re doing?”

“…That’s difficult. Alfodhr is clearly a being of higher rank than us, and he thoroughly protects his apostle.”

Astraea clicked her tongue in frustration as she answered. Unfortunately, even the celestial gods seemed to know nothing about Feirius’s whereabouts.

They know that he’s destroying Heaven’s Wall to hasten Alfodhr’s descent, but they have no way to track exactly where he is now.

If he were to cause some incident, they could roughly guess his location from the aftermath, but when he’s hiding quietly like now, there’s no solution.

I thought it might be easy, but it was clearly not. A truly regrettable situation.

—-

And finally, the main point.

I finally voiced the reason and purpose that had brought me to Astraea’s church with reluctant steps.

“Lately, Vanirgand keeps appearing in my dreams and it’s driving me crazy… is there any way to drive him out?”

“…So it has begun after all.”

As if she had expected this, as if it were already predetermined, Astraea didn’t seem surprised and merely let out a faint sigh.

“Then…”

She answered.

The way to get rid of that damned wolf who keeps killing me over and over in my dreams.

It was.