Ch.109109. Live Your Life

    “Huh?”

    Suhyeok was perplexed.

    A plea for help usually meant a major crisis had befallen the group, but ironically, Spirit was currently on break.

    No practice, no scheduled performances—a true vacation in every sense.

    What on earth could be threatening their existence?

    “What do you mean?”

    “Well… um…”

    Seo-eun decided to carefully bring up the content of her conversation with Jaejun.

    “You know… sigh… Juyeon and Hana.”

    Seo-eun twirled the ends of her hair with her finger.

    “Yeah.”

    “You know they both like you, right?”

    A blunt intervention.

    It violated Seo-eun’s principles of conduct, but the situation called for it.

    Suhyeok nodded with a grim expression.

    Fair enough.

    Perhaps Seo-eun had known about this situation even before he did.

    Girls often shared more information among themselves.

    After all, Seo-eun was the spiritual pillar everyone in Spirit relied on.

    It wouldn’t be strange if both Hana and Juyeon had sought her advice.

    “Did you receive confessions too?”

    Saliva slid down Seo-eun’s throat.

    Suhyeok’s throat was equally parched.

    He filled his glass and downed the soju in one gulp.

    “…Yeah.”

    “From both?”

    “Just from Juyeon.”

    He had thought this might happen, but the fire had already started to spread.

    “So what did you say?”

    “Well… it was a situation where it was… difficult to give an answer.”

    Juyeon hadn’t firmly demanded that Suhyeok accept her confession or promised to wait for his answer.

    What she had asked of him was to continue their friendly relationship as always, at least until he found someone to date.

    After hearing his explanation, Seo-eun tapped the table with her index finger.

    “So what did you tell her?”

    “I just said I understood…”

    “I see.”

    Seo-eun fell into thought for a moment.

    Eventually, she spoke.

    “Suhyeok.”

    “Yeah?”

    “If you end up with Hana, what do you think will happen to Juyeon?”

    Suhyeok couldn’t answer readily.

    “I think… she’ll have a hard time.”

    “I agree. Then what if you become a couple with Juyeon instead?”

    That was actually a situation Suhyeok had never considered.

    Choosing Juyeon over Hana…?

    Of course, if his confession to Hana was firmly rejected and enough time passed, it might be a different story, but Suhyeok hadn’t thought that far ahead yet.

    “Um… but if things don’t work out with Hana and that happens, I don’t think there would be any problem…”

    Suhyeok thought that if he were rejected by Hana, there would be nothing wrong with dating Juyeon.

    He didn’t think Hana would take issue with it or feel bad about it.

    “Suhyeok.”

    “Yeah.”

    “If you choose one of them and start dating,”

    Seo-eun calmly got to the point.

    “We won’t be able to hang out like we used to.”

    Seo-eun showed him her phone’s lock screen.

    It was their most recent photo.

    A group shot taken in front of the mirror before a competition.

    The smiling members.

    Juyeon. Hana. Seo-eun. Choi-gang. Suhyeok.

    “If your heart leans toward Hana and you start dating her.”

    Seo-eun covered Juyeon, who was at the very edge, with her thumb.

    “This is what we’ll become.”

    There’s a difference between thinking something yourself and hearing someone else express that thought.

    Suhyeok’s gaze fixed on Seo-eun’s phone screen.

    The 23rd generation without Juyeon.

    “But… still. I don’t think Juyeon would completely leave or stop participating…”

    “True. That’s also right.”

    Seo-eun nodded in understanding.

    “Neither of them is the type to irresponsibly throw everything away and run off.”

    “But the time we spend together won’t be enjoyable anymore.”

    “How hard would it be to keep showing up when the person you like is with someone else?”

    “I couldn’t invite everyone to hang out anymore. Besides practice, it would be difficult for us to have any gatherings.”

    Suhyeok couldn’t respond.

    “…So what am I supposed to do?”

    Hana and Juyeon.

    The 23rd generation couldn’t be called the 23rd generation if even one of them was missing.

    Though his emotional scale might waver, it was clear that Suhyeok deeply cared for both of them.

    “Just until winter.”

    Seo-eun let out a short sigh.

    “No matter who confesses to you, could you postpone your response?”

    Suhyeok’s brow furrowed.

    This was problematic because he had been planning to confess to Hana right away.

    When Suhyeok remained silent with a serious expression, Seo-eun added further explanation.

    “I know. I do. That this is… really… a terrible thing to ask of you. That I’m excessively interfering in your personal life.”

    “But Suhyeok.”

    Seo-eun took a drink of soju.

    “I’m the leader.”

    The leader’s share.

    The leader’s role.

    It was to keep the group healthy and intact.

    Not doing anything to prevent the collapse of the 23rd generation when she knew how to stop it would be Seo-eun neglecting her duty.

    “Of course, I can’t blame you if you don’t accept this.”

    “Frankly speaking, if you want to date someone you like, how could I possibly stop you?”

    “So this is a request.”

    Seo-eun looked into Suhyeok’s eyes with a bitter expression.

    “Please postpone dating until our official activities are over.”

    If Suhyeok said he didn’t want to do that, Seo-eun was prepared to give up.

    Because Suhyeok was also a younger brother she cherished.

    “Then.”

    Suhyeok turned his head to look out the window.

    “What am I supposed to do?”

    “If Hana also speaks honestly to me, how am I supposed to spend the remaining semester?”

    Postpone Juyeon’s confession.

    Postpone Hana’s confession.

    In such a state, what exactly was he supposed to do sitting in the club room?

    Suhyeok just couldn’t picture that scenario right now.

    “Treat them both warmly.”

    “Just like they’re both equally friends.”

    “You don’t need to do anything special.”

    “Just, Suhyeok.”

    “Just tell them both that it seems a bit too early for dating right now.”

    What would be the right decision?

    If he acted as Seo-eun requested, the painful future that would immediately arrive could be delayed.

    The performances would likely proceed without major issues.

    If they took another photo, everyone would probably smile for it.

    But it felt like there wouldn’t be the same sincerity as before.

    Wouldn’t it feel precarious, like standing on a glacier about to break, or on a bridge about to collapse?

    Juyeon’s face came to mind.

    Just earlier today, Juyeon had come to him wanting to learn guitar.

    The girl who told him he was cool while watching him play guitar, I…

    Thinking that he would be the one erasing her from the photo, Suhyeok had to endure pain that felt like tearing his own heart out.

    Where did it all go wrong?

    Did I even do anything wrong in the first place?

    It doesn’t seem like I’ve been doing anything terrible by anyone’s standards.

    I always tried to be really good to everyone…

    Why is the result…

    “…It hurts.”

    Instead of an answer, he expressed his pain.

    Suhyeok grabbed his hair as if tearing it out.

    “I’m sorry, Suhyeok.”

    Seo-eun apologized.

    She got up from her chair, approached Suhyeok, and rubbed his back.

    “I’m sorry.”

    “Noona.”

    “Yes?”

    “Would Choi-gang think the same as you?”

    Suhyeok was curious about the opinion of another member who didn’t know about his love life.

    “Choi-gang… well… it would be best to ask him directly, but…”

    Seo-eun recited his expected reaction.

    “He’d probably tell you to do whatever you want.”

    “But even if he doesn’t show it, he’s the type to feel hurt.”

    “You know too. Even though he doesn’t seem like it, Choi-gang tries really hard to participate.”

    “Yeah.”

    The conversation about the 23rd generation continued for a while after that.

    What would be best going forward.

    How Suhyeok should act to be wise.

    As the night deepened.

    Seo-eun’s phone vibrated.

    “Oh? It’s oppa. Suhyeok, just a moment.”

    Seo-eun answered the phone.

    “Yes, oppa.”

    “Honey. I’m having a drink with Suhyeok.”

    “No~ just the two of us.”

    “Ugh… I’m not drunk…”

    “Having a deep talk with our Suhyeokie…”

    “Hey! What cheating! Suhyeok already has two women!”

    Suhyeok, who was drinking water, almost spat it out.

    “I just want to be the girlfriend of an unpopular oppa.”

    Seo-eun giggled.

    “Ah. Yes! Got it.”

    The call ended.

    “Suhyeok.”

    “Yeah?”

    “Jaejun oppa says he’s coming to pick me up, so let’s leave when he gets here.”

    Seo-eun was relieved that Suhyeok had listened to her opinion well.

    She felt like they could somehow make it through until the winter performance.

    “Lee Seo-eun.”

    Jaejun entered the restaurant.

    He found himself facing his junior who was having a private conversation with his girlfriend.

    “Lee Seo-eun. Get up.”

    “Oppa. I need to go to the bathroom.”

    “Go ahead.”

    As Seo-eun staggered into the bathroom, Jaejun observed Suhyeok, who looked exhausted.

    His face was flushed red.

    Jaejun let out a deep sigh.

    “Suhyeok.”

    “Yes, hyung.”

    Jaejun, who roughly knew the whole situation.

    He definitely knew what Seo-eun had said, but his true feelings were completely different from hers.

    “Whatever Seo-eun said, I think you should do what you want.”

    “More precisely, choose the option you’ll regret the least when you look back later.”

    “Spirit this, whatever that.”

    Jaejun smirked.

    “Fuck all that.”

    “The club won’t take responsibility for your life.”

    “If your relationship fails because of this, who will you blame?”

    “Will you ask Seo-eun why she did that?”

    It was like being hit with a hammer multiple times today.

    Suhyeok listened in bewilderment as the conversation continued.

    “Suhyeok.”

    “Yes.”

    “Live your own life.”

    Though he seemed like an old-fashioned nag to anyone watching, Suhyeok was deeply moved by Jaejun’s words.


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