Ch.10335. Yuri’s Visit to Busan (5)

Yuri Tarkovskaya was, until just a moment ago, the happiest woman in the world.

The man she loved, Min-soo, had opened his heart to her. It was the moment when two people who had been looking only at each other for a long time finally connected with sincerity.

And Min-soo confessed to her himself. That it was his first time too. When she heard those words, Yuri felt as if her cold heart was melting.

It was her first time as well. Sharing each other’s first time. Even though Yuri was inexperienced in love, she understood the precious meaning of this as lovers.

Moreover, the Slavic Kingdom was a conservative nation where the White Cross Society was the state religion. As a Grand Duchess, the meaning of her purity was even more special.

After calming her bursting heart a little, she followed Min-soo’s lead. Regarding matters of intimacy, Yuri knew nothing. All she had received was formal sex education from educational institutions.

So while her heart wanted to hurry and become one with him, she was clumsy and slowly let Min-soo take the lead. What happened afterward was incredibly blissful.

Although they didn’t cross the final line, they shared physical contact that a man and woman, as adults, could share together.

Yuri was completely ignorant about sex. She even had an aversion to men, and just imagining such things made her uncomfortable.

But with Min-soo, she didn’t dislike it at all. No, rather, she was so excited that she wanted to hurry to the final stage with him.

She had heard that a woman’s first time was painful, but if it was with Min-soo, she truly didn’t care.

If she were to make love with Min-soo, in that moment, Yuri would have thought she was born into this world for a good reason. She would have been sincerely happy to become his woman.

However, that final act did not happen.

The moment Min-soo would become her man. And the moment she would become Min-soo’s woman. She wanted to feel that first moment and happiness purely, just the two of them.

So she completed the eternal barrier. But as soon as the eternal barrier was completed, Min-soo had a panic attack.

Min-soo was in such pain that he could barely breathe. She saw him barely suppressing what seemed like an animal-like scream trying to escape.

And that scene awakened the trauma of that day, which was still vivid before her eyes.

When Min-soo, who had lost consciousness and slept for a year, opened his eyes again. Upon hearing the news, she canceled all of Flame’s schedules and rushed to the hospital where he was admitted.

But that day, Min-soo had a panic attack when he saw her. Like someone who had witnessed something terribly frightening. Min-soo was afraid of her.

Since that day, Yuri had suffered from severe insomnia. The fact that the person she loved rejected her, no, feared her so much, was an unbearably terrible experience that words could not describe.

And Min-soo before her eyes now, just like that day more than a year ago, was having a panic attack. Though she was shocked to the point where her mind went blank, calming Min-soo’s condition had to come first.

Fortunately, Min-soo had panic medication he was taking. She hurriedly undid the eternal barrier to find that medicine. They were both naked, but the situation was so urgent that there wasn’t even time to put clothes back on.

In that sudden situation, even the snow woman’s emotions that had been controlling her rationality subsided momentarily. Shortly after, as the medicine took effect, Min-soo’s panic stopped.

‘That was truly fortunate, but…’

In the brief moment of relief, she finally felt the tears flowing down her cheeks. Yuri was not accustomed to her own tears.

The prestigious Tarkovsky family of the Slavic Kingdom. And she was the sole heir to that family, which had now become the Grand Ducal house.

For someone like her, crying was not allowed. The Tarkovsky family was strong. There was only one moment when tears were permitted for the strong.

A moment filled with victory. Tears of joy that could be shed due to the winner’s happiness. That was all. It was also a discipline that had been drilled into her during her heir training until her ears hurt.

But now Yuri was crying. And these tears were absolutely not to be shed as a Grand Duchess.

Sadness. Confusion. Embarrassment. Regret. Remorse. Tears that flowed unconsciously because she didn’t know how to handle all those emotions herself, and crying was all she could do.

Yuri continued to cry with her back turned to Min-soo. She thought she should stop, but the tears kept flowing like an unceasing rain.

‘What… what have I done to Min-soo…’

It was the same reaction as the day Min-soo regained consciousness. So the trigger for the panic attack was undoubtedly herself.

Yuri was not a fool. If she hadn’t trapped Min-soo in the eternal barrier that day. If she had cooperated with Min-soo in time.

The tragedy at Eins would not have happened. Rather, the graduation ceremony of the 19th class would have ended with endless praise and blessings, as they would have been proud cadets who prevented a villain’s terror.

But the tragedy did happen. Many cadets and officials died. And although Min-soo became Eins’s hero.

He suffered such severe injuries that he lost consciousness for a year. Though he returned to the hunter world, the aftereffects of those injuries and the tragedy remained, as evident now.

And today’s Yuri. She herself had essentially reopened Min-soo’s wounds and stirred inside them. By triggering his trauma, she had undoubtedly caused his panic attack.

“It’s all… because of me… Min-soo… you…”

Due to her terrible regret and remorse, Yuri couldn’t think properly. She wouldn’t mind if Min-soo cursed her and condemned her as a bad woman.

No, she thought he should. But because of her unceasing tears, she couldn’t utter a single word herself.

And though it was a terribly selfish feeling, she wanted his forgiveness. The relationship she thought had ended had just barely grown closer.

As the guild leader of Flame and an employee, even that distance was fine. She was happy just to be able to see Min-soo again. So she hated the thought of him distancing himself from her more than death.

That’s why.

Despite having endured well until now, she couldn’t bear it today. The thought of Min-soo, who had just grown closer, moving away was unbearable. It felt like she was being torn into tiny pieces.

Seeing him kiss Soso drove Yuri crazy.

‘But I should have endured… if Min-soo forgives me… I shouldn’t be greedy and even from afar…’

But she actually knew she couldn’t do that. Her love for him was too great. She was confused. No matter what she did, her heart wouldn’t settle.

‘I should first tell Min-soo I’m sorry… that I’m sorry…’

And as she was crying with that confused heart, Yuri flinched.

From behind her as she lay with her back turned, she felt a warm and gentle touch. Min-soo was embracing her from behind.

Min-soo’s embrace, the sensation of being held by him, his body temperature was so warm. And because of that warmth, Yuri couldn’t stop the tears that kept flowing.

Min-soo, who had always been so warm to her. It was she who had left him with pain like death and trauma.

Unconsciously, those feelings burst from her lips.

“It’s all… because of me, right? That you suffered… so painfully from panic?”

And Min-soo answered her.

“Yes.”

At those words, Yuri’s world collapsed once more.

***

The tears that had been flowing so freely stopped momentarily. And Yuri Tarkovskaya felt as if her heart had stopped right there.

‘As I thought. It was all because of me.’

She knew that because she had trapped Min-soo in the eternal barrier, the tragedy at Eins had occurred because of her.

So it was natural for him to answer “yes.” She had just witnessed his panic attack firsthand.

She saw that it was her eternal barrier, her attempt to bind Min-soo, that triggered his panic attack. If Min-soo had answered “no,” it would have been a lie.

‘I should apologize to Min-soo now. Because of me, Min-soo had to endure such pain…’

Numerous emotions swirled in Yuri’s mind, but right now, she had to apologize to him. And then she had to accept whatever he said next.

If he told her to leave his side, she had to do so. No, perhaps his resentment toward her was so great that he actually wanted to kill her.

If he asked her to take responsibility for what happened, Yuri could do that. If that was truly what Min-soo wanted, if she could atone to Min-soo with her death.

But Min-soo didn’t press her. No, rather, as if to calm her, he stroked Yuri’s white hair.

That touch felt incredibly warm, but due to her terrible remorse toward Min-soo, it also felt painful.

‘If things end with Min-soo like this… I…’

She couldn’t envision any future beyond that. Yuri couldn’t say anything. An eternity seemed to pass.

Finally, Min-soo spoke first. But his voice was calm. No, it was rather affectionate.

“I’m not trying to blame you. I only answered that way because you saw my attack, and I needed to explain the truth.”

“What do you mean…”

For a moment, Yuri tried to escape from Min-soo’s embrace, but he held her tighter. And like at Eins, he spoke in a gentle voice.

“I’m grateful to you. Because of Flame, I was able to return to the hunter world.”

And briefly, his words continued. About his trauma. That the eternal barrier and the distance from Yuri herself triggered his trauma.

And yet, Min-soo had returned to Yuri’s side.

“It’s a trauma that will heal anyway. You’re important to me, so I can overcome it. Someday, for sure.”

At those words, Yuri’s heart raced. Min-soo’s words sounded like salvation to her. Because those words meant that Min-soo would not leave her side.

Her heart, which had been frozen with terrible regret and remorse until just now, seemed to start moving again.

“But if something like today happens again… if you’re at Flame… you’ll inevitably keep seeing me…”

“Don’t worry. Until then, we can maintain an appropriate distance like we have been.”

Saying this, Min-soo continued to stroke her head. His touch was so gentle that she wanted to act spoiled. But Yuri desperately calmed that feeling.

“Appropriate distance…”

And she pondered Min-soo’s words once more. She thought she had maintained a good distance from Min-soo until now.

She too had done her best as the guild leader of Flame. And even without showing favoritism as an employee, Min-soo had already proven his skills far beyond Yuri’s expectations.

‘But… but I’m not confident. If I see Min-soo with Soso or… Arin again like today…’

Because she was touching his bare skin now, she became even more aware of how precious and desirable this warmth was.

She didn’t even want to imagine Min-soo being in bed with another woman. If she were to witness such a scene, she might kill all those women.

Though it was an absurd thought, having experienced something similar today, Yuri knew. If Soso had been in this hotel room, if she had seen Min-soo rolling around with her, she might have killed Soso.

‘That’s why… as soon as I entered this place and saw the long black hair…’

And she would have trapped Min-soo in the eternal barrier, making him look only at her forever. Of course, now that the snow woman’s blood had calmed, Yuri’s cold rationality was screaming that she absolutely shouldn’t do that.

But it was still painful. It was too painful to see Min-soo with another woman. No, even just a kiss was unbearable. She didn’t like him holding hands with someone else. She didn’t like him even talking with someone else.

But as if to soothe such feelings in Yuri, Min-soo whispered in her ear.

“I won’t date any other woman.”

And Min-soo turned her body. Min-soo’s black eyes looked at her.

It was a gaze without a trace of falsehood. Yuri knew that look. She knew from her experience at Eins that Min-soo with such a serious expression always spoke only the truth.

Yuri instinctively nestled into his embrace.

“Really…? Not Soso, not Arin?”

Min-soo nodded. He spoke in a low voice.

“Until the day I complete my revenge. Until I eliminate the Red Lake, the source of my trauma. I intend to focus on my work until then.”

“The source of your trauma…”

“Yes. Although your eternal barrier became the trigger for my panic, the source of that trauma is the Red Lake. That’s why I don’t blame you.”

“Red Lake…”

That villain group that Yuri already knew about echoed in her mind.

‘Red Lake… Red Lake…’

According to Min-soo’s words, if they eliminated the Red Lake from this earth, Min-soo’s trauma would completely disappear.

When that time comes, there would be no need to maintain distance from Min-soo. Just like they were able to today, they could become one.

‘I must eliminate the Red Lake. Then everything will return to how it was.’

Yuri nodded vigorously.

“Yes. Then I’ll definitely help you with the Red Lake… with your revenge!”

And for that revenge, she knew that both Yeon Soso and Seong Arin were necessary. As the guild leader of Flame, Yuri naturally understood this.

Min-soo hugged her tightly. Their faces came very close, almost touching lips.

“So just be patient until then. Listen to me well.”

“Yes…”

Yuri resolved. From now on, whatever Min-soo said, she would do anything for him. She could feel Min-soo’s breath.

And soon their lips overlapped. Tears flowed down Yuri’s cheeks again. They were undoubtedly tears of joy.

‘I will never… be abandoned by Min-soo. Because I love him.’

Yuri thought that Min-soo’s heart was surely the same as hers.