Amnesia

When the word “unexpected” is combined with a positive element, joy is multiplied. Unexpected profit, unexpected help. Like the joy of a movie watched without expectation becoming a life movie, the joy of gaining an unexpected collaborator to overcome a difficult future had the effect of relieving the heavy burden on my mind.

As Roel-nim suggested, I can now just enjoy a comfortable academy life with the club members without having to step forward dangerously and just watch the Demon King die. If it’s Roel-nim’s words, I’ll obediently follow them so I don’t have to worry about it unnecessarily. Passengers just need to listen to the bus driver.

My old inferiority complex was so faint that it was barely noticeable in the face of happiness, I was so happy that I could shed tears of joy right now.

“…th.”

Now, worries about the uncertain future have disappeared. I just need to enjoy the life of a transmigrator with a lighter heart. It’s worth considering going on a trip to a resort in the south with Luna during the winter vacation. Things I wanted to do that I couldn’t even think about before keep popping into my head.

Going hiking with the Messiah club members isn’t bad either. Kane, who likes camping, and Lacar, who likes being with friends, won’t refuse. Luna will like it because I’m there, and Aria can be easily tempted with the promise of grilled meat.

The joy that had been suppressed by worries and anxieties, as if trying to compensate for the past sorrows, keeps imagining all sorts of things. Should we make Buldak stir-fried noodles? Good. Let’s even make corn cheese and give it to Luna and Aria as a gift.

“Ros…!”

Someone grabbed me. The feeling of floating in the sky as if I was caught in a hallucination disappeared, and suddenly my vision returned. I was so distracted that I didn’t even know what I had been looking at before. I didn’t even realize I had returned to the club room.

Luna, who grabbed me, was looking up at me with an anxious face. I hugged Luna with a genuine smile. I could feel my smile getting wider with the warmth I felt in my arms.

“It’s all okay now. There’s nothing to be anxious or worried about at all. Only happy things are left in the future.”

At my words, Luna wriggled in my arms and pulled her face out. Luna, with a look full of embarrassment, pushed me away slightly and escaped from my arms.

Such an awkward reaction in a situation where I should be dancing with joy, I’m a little disappointed. But Luna, who doesn’t know my worries and anxieties, wouldn’t understand. Because she didn’t know that the world would be on the verge of destruction in the future. I’m the only one who can be happy about the unexpected collaborator.

But Luna’s next words were unexpected.

“Are, are you okay, Ross…?”

“Huh? Of course, I’m okay.”

Even if my parents suddenly appeared, slapped me on the cheek, and insulted me in front of Luna, I could still smile with joy. Of course, I’m okay.

But Luna looked at me blankly with an expression that she couldn’t believe my words. How should I prove that I’m okay? Is it dancing again?

Luna reached out and grabbed my hand. And she raised the hand she grabbed and showed it to me. The hand that came into my eyes was hideous. Luna said with tears in her eyes.

“Your fists are covered in wounds and your school uniform is covered in blood…?”

It’s a hand that’s shattered to the point where the white bones are exposed. I stared blankly at my shattered hand for a moment. When did this happen…? It’s not like I drank alcohol and blacked out. I didn’t even feel the pain until Luna showed me my hand.

It’s not just one hand. The other hand was also torn and shattered just as hideously. I don’t know how I got hurt. But I can guess how I got hurt through recent experiences.

I punched the wall with my fist. Desperately, with all my might.

A question arises. I don’t know the reason, but even if I blacked out for a while, I don’t have a hobby of self-harming out of joy. Then there’s no way to explain why these wounds appeared.

Luna looked at my hand and said tearfully.

“Ro, Ross… Let’s go to the infirmary first. Let’s treat your hands first….”

With those words, Luna tried to drag me to the infirmary. But I couldn’t move my steps because of a strange sense of unease rising in my chest. I felt like if I missed this trace, I would never catch up again.

I traced back my memories before meeting Luna. After talking with Rosaline, I thanked her and left the classroom. And when I came to my senses, I had arrived at the club room.

That means there’s a reason why I punched the wall with my fist in between. Why can’t I remember? I raised my head and checked the clock on the wall. At least an hour had passed since I parted with Rosaline. An hour of blank space. I muttered out loud without realizing it.

“Why… don’t I have any memories?”

An hour has passed, but there are no memories left in my head. Except for my bloody fists, there’s not even a trace.

Luna, who was trying to drag me to the infirmary, flinched greatly at my muttering.

“Ro, Ross, what did you just say…?”

“I don’t remember. After talking with Rosaline sunbae-nim for a while, I don’t have any memories of the hour in between returning to the club room.”

Luna pursed her lips. As if she remembered something, she frowned slightly and muttered, “Could it be….” Could it be that I used to be like this often?

“Have I ever lost my memory before?”

Luna thought for a moment and then shook her head.

“Ah, anyway, let’s go to the infirmary first. We need to treat you quickly…!”

Luna can’t lie. Because her emotions are revealed on her face, you can tell at a glance whether she’s angry or happy. So, it was so obvious that she was changing the subject now, but I couldn’t help but follow her because of the worried look in her eyes.

It was Luna who couldn’t refuse my request. After the treatment is over, if I ask for an explanation, she won’t be able to refuse.

I followed Luna out of the club room and headed to the infirmary.

I’ve already found the clue to the sense of unease. An hour of blank space. What happened during that time will be the reason why I punched the wall with my fist with all my might.

When Luna urgently knocked on the infirmary door, Professor Joy, with a tired expression, opened the door. Professor Joy, who checked my and Luna’s faces, said with an indifferent expression.

“Isn’t it too early to come to the infirmary already?”

Luna shook her head with an apologetic face and showed Professor Joy my hand. Professor Joy, who checked the wounds on my hand, made a pathetic expression.

“You did this last time too… Do you think it’s cool to punch the wall with your fist or something?”

At the gesture to come in, I entered the infirmary without saying a word. The infirmary was empty, with no one injured. Luna, who followed, stroked my waist diligently, as if she was trying to soothe my pain.

As I sat down on the chair, Professor Joy brought a wet cloth.

“Let’s wipe off the blood and disinfect it first. Tell me if it hurts.”

Unlike her annoyed expression, the hand that wipes off the blood is careful and delicate. I must have punched the wall so hard that I frowned without realizing it at the sight of the wounds that appeared as I wiped off the blood.

“It must have been incredibly painful with this much. You must have been really angry?”

Professor Joy, who was wiping off the blood while speaking sarcastically, suddenly stopped wiping off the blood from the other hand.

“Blood keeps flowing from your left arm?”

As Professor Joy said, even after wiping off the blood, blood continued to soak her hands from the school uniform. At the request to take off my top, I took off my school uniform with Luna’s help. Luna, who was peeling off the blood-soaked sleeves, suddenly flinched and gasped as if she was surprised.

There was a large wound on her forearm above her wrist, as if she had been cut with a knife. As the school uniform that covered the wound disappeared, blood began to flow out at a rapid rate.

Professor Joy threw the cloth away and urgently took out a bottle from the cabinet.

“It’s a disinfectant containing a little potion. You can disinfect and stop the bleeding all at once with this. Just bear with the pain a little. When it’s over, I’ll pour as much potion containing a sedative as you want right away.”

With a short warning, Professor Joy, who opened the lid, poured disinfectant on my left arm. I gritted my teeth at the pain that felt like my skin was burning. Luna, who was fidgeting beside me, stroked my back diligently. It definitely felt like the pain was disappearing a little just from that.

Professor Joy, who poured in the disinfectant, wiped the arm that was bubbling and foaming red with a new clean cloth. I lowered my gaze and endured the pain.

At that time, I heard Luna’s surprised voice in my ear.

“Ah! Le, letters…!”

At Luna’s words, I raised my gaze again. I shifted my gaze to my forearm, which Professor Joy was staring blankly at as she wiped off the disinfectant.

The bleeding that had been covering the wound with blood had stopped. Thanks to Professor Joy wiping off the disinfectant with a cloth, I could see the wound properly.

There were letters made of wounds on her forearm.

It was a crooked letter that seemed to have been left on the skin using something sharp to avoid forgetting. Judging from the area of the wound, it seemed like I had done it. Since I’m right-handed, it would have been easier to leave something on my left forearm.

Luna’s and Professor Joy’s gazes reached my face. But I didn’t have anything to answer because I didn’t have any memories.

I’m just thinking. I was curious about the reason why I had to desperately leave wounds on my forearm, punching the wall with my fists without even thinking about finding a pen and moving from that spot.

It’s an unfamiliar word to me. I know the first two letters better than anyone else, but the one letter that follows makes it unfamiliar. Even if I think about it over and over again, nothing comes to mind. Judging from the fact that the two people also seem to want me to explain it, it’s not a trendy word these days either. Then how did I write this?

The word that the wound made was this.

Roelli