Affections’ Projection
by Afuhfuihgs
When I couldn’t give any answer, Bella looked straight at me, as if trying to hold my gaze, and said this.
“Roel is always throwing himself into the flames. Even if he gets hurt and scarred, he doesn’t blame his choices or give up. He endlessly pursues his dreams, repeating the act of throwing himself into the flames across countless worlds and eons.”
Roel is a hero. He’s the kind of person who wouldn’t hesitate to throw himself into the flames for someone he doesn’t even know, without expecting anything in return. The fact that he experiences countless deaths and repeats endless despair to save the world is clear evidence that Roel is a hero.
“Even if you defeat the God of the Chaos Church, the flames won’t end. Somewhere, an unextinguished spark will plunge the continent into danger again, and Roel will throw himself in every time. A person who could have everything by staying still, but isn’t afraid of what he’ll lose and fights endlessly – that’s the true hero you’ve been dreaming of.”
A sad smile hung on Bella’s lips. Looking at me with tearful eyes as if she would burst into tears any moment, Bella asked in a voice choked with emotion.
“Can such a hero really be happy?”
I was speechless. It felt like something was blocking the middle of my throat. I thought that answering immediately without hesitation would ease Bella’s worries, but I couldn’t think of a plausible thing to say.
While thinking about the character Roel, I never considered the hero’s pain at all. I just had a vague idea that that level of hardship was okay for a handsome hero who was loved by everyone.
There were no frustrating sections in the novel either. Because Roel is always a beloved hero. Even if there are brief misunderstandings, the people who eventually realize the truth all praise and love Roel. Those who doubted him regret and repent.
I thought that was okay. Because Roel would eventually be compensated for everything. So, I answered Bella’s first question that it would naturally have a happy ending.
However, like Bella said, that happy ending is just the end of the novel. If someone appears to take over the continent following the cult leader, Roel will definitely fight. Throwing himself into the flames… it will only end after those flames have completely burned Roel away.
Bella is a smart person. So, she probably thought of the conclusion I belatedly came to first. That ending Roel’s fight and falling into peace is when his life ends.
So, she’s asking me. Whether I, the author, know a way for Roel to be happy that she hasn’t thought of.
I don’t know.
After the novel ends, I was just planning to end it with him living happily with his lovers for a long time.
I hadn’t really thought about the life after that because I was busy preparing for the sequel.
So, I don’t know if there’s a way for Roel to stop throwing himself into the flames other than death. There was a high possibility there wasn’t. Because the foundation of the character Roel is a self-sacrificing hero.
Fortunately, lying was my special talent and advantage. I know what answer Bella wants.
I met Bella’s gaze directly. Feeling the gaze mixed with hazy emotions, I answered powerfully.
“He can be happy. This novel isn’t about defeating the enemy, but about the protagonist overcoming numerous trials and finally reaching happiness as the ending.”
The real liar is the one who makes the other person never realize they’ve been lied to. My answer might be a lie now. But I just have to make this lie real later. I’m the author who created this world. Even if I don’t have the power of a god, the author decides the ending of the story.
“Roel will definitely be happy. I’ll make it that way.”
Bella bit her lip at my confident voice. She trembled slightly, as if satisfied with hearing the answer she wanted, then tilted her gaze slightly and said.
“A few days ago… the cult secretly approached me.”
“…The cult, you say?”
“You know there are many nobles in the capital involved with the cult, right? One of them delivered a letter to me containing the cult leader’s wishes.”
Now I think I know why Bella suddenly invited me.
“The cult leader said that he could help Roel reach happiness.”
“…The cult leader is Roel’s enemy.”
“I know. But I need assurance.”
Golden eyes with a faint anxiety turned to me. She’s wavering. Did she make the right choice? Isn’t she leading Roel into an endless battle, rather than making him victorious? She’s conflicted.
“…Can you swear?”
I was about to answer her quiet question right away. But Bella wasn’t finished speaking.
“That even if you lose everything, you’ll definitely make Roel reach happiness.”
In that moment, I realized why Bella’s appearance overlapped with my mother’s.
“That your inferiority complex will never harm Roel… can you swear?”
My drunken mother always instilled anxiety in me. She would shed tears as if today was her last day, creating an atmosphere that seemed like she would make an extreme choice, and eventually elicit the answer she wanted from me.
And the next day, unlike me, who had spent the night tossing and turning with anxiety and worry, my mother would go about her daily life with a face that didn’t remember anything. Just like my relationship with my mother belonged to an inseparable love-hate relationship, so does my relationship with Bella.
Maybe when I created Bella, I mixed the image of the mother I wanted with the image of the mother I knew.
With that thought, I looked at Bella, who was waiting for the answer she wanted to flow from my mouth, and answered with a bitter smile.
“I can swear.”
Bella smiled brightly at that answer.
Just like my mother, who would get me to promise not to contact each other anymore.
So, I thought the conversation was over here. Because my mother had gotten up from her seat after hearing my answer and left the cafe without looking back. But Bella seemed to still have something to say to me.
“Roel wants to open the labyrinth under the Imperial Palace to everyone.”
At those words, Yunis’s advice to find out the purpose of opening the labyrinth came to mind.
“Why are you trying to open the labyrinth?”
“Because there’s something Roel desperately wants inside the labyrinth.”
In that moment, a strange smile appeared on Bella’s lips.
“I heard there’s an item called the Holy Grail on the 10th floor of the labyrinth that grants all wishes.”
“…The 10th floor.”
Roel, who had unlocked the seal of the Holy Sword, could only reach the 4th floor with his own power. But if the goal isn’t to conquer the floors by putting countless people into the labyrinth and using their deaths as stairs, but simply to find a way down… I think I know the reason for trying to fully open the labyrinth.
“Since the Immortal is dead, Roel is thinking of saving everyone through the Holy Grail.”
I frowned. And I took out the setting book and looked for information about the Holy Grail. It’s not anywhere. It seems to be one of the discarded settings.
“…You won’t be able to defeat the God of the Chaos Church even if you use the Holy Grail.”
“Why?”
“If that was possible with the power of God, there would have been no need to create another world and escape the shackles created by the setting error. You could just remove the God of the Chaos Church who intervened in the novel at will.”
Bella nodded as if she understood my explanation.
“But Roel wants the Holy Grail. So, we have to stop him.”
“…Do you really have to open the labyrinth to everyone?”
“Because it’s what Roel wants. If I refuse his request, won’t he suspect something is wrong?”
That’s true too. Bella’s role is to support us while being by Roel’s side. If Bella refuses, Roel will find another way without us knowing. It’s more advantageous for us to control the situation under surveillance.
“And there’s another reason why I don’t oppose fully opening the labyrinth to everyone without restrictions.”
I asked unconsciously at the sight of Bella, who had returned to her usual self and was wearing a snake-like smile.
“What’s the reason?”
“When the doors of the closed labyrinth open… the cult will definitely participate, aiming for the massive relics and rewards sleeping inside the labyrinth.”
They say the basics of a strategist are to gain many things with one plan. Bella is thinking of using Roel’s irresistible request to lure the cult into the capital.
Bella leaned her upper body towards me. In that moment, a strong fragrance stimulated the tip of my nose. Bella said with a beautiful smile that I hadn’t seen before… a smile that seemed like she would only show to Roel.
“Roel and the cult. Can you get the Holy Grail against those two powerful forces?”
In that moment, I felt it was cruel.
Forcing a predetermined answer out of my mouth after pushing me to the edge of a cliff and eliminating the choices always made my stomach churn.
“…I have to.”
I gave a bitter smile as a habit.
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