6. Emotional Numbness (2)

*Crack!*

The sword pierced through the skull.

Yanked it free – face went slack as the body collapsed forward, hitting the doorframe with a *thunk!*

“Hahk! Hahk! Hahk!”

Over…

Is it over?

“Kyaaak! Kyaaaaak!”

…Not yet.

What?

What’s left?

Can’t see anything through the gap.

What now?

“Kyaaaak! Kyaaak!”

Where are you?

Can’t see you.

Peering through the gap reveals nothing. Only high-pitched, childlike screeches.

Childlike…

…High-pitched…screeches?

……Don’t tell me……

“Kyaaak! Kyaaaak!”

Bodies piled outside.

Something fluttering.

…A hand.

…A child’s hand.

“Kyaaak! Kyaaaak!”

……Fucking hell……

Pressed hand against wall.

Closed eyes.

No, shouldn’t close them.

Opened again.

“Huu…haa…”

Hand on waist, stepped back from door.

“Kyaaaak! Kyaaaaak!”

Flailing, pounding sounds.

Just stood staring at the door.

“…Haa…haa…”

…Knew this would happen.

It’s the apocalypse.

Not just adults affected.

Kids too…

Even babies probably died or turned.

Hand on waist, turned head away.

Sighed.

Looked down and exhaled.

“…Haa…”

Fingers traced the cross-wrapped leather on sword hilt.

This is a good sword.

Grip’s solid, much better than that makeshift spear wrapped in belts.

Hefty steel – strong enough to pierce skulls when thrust properly.

…Good sword.

“Kyaaaak! Kyaaaaak!”

*Tap*

Hand on shelf.

Stop thinking.

From now on, no thoughts.

I hold a sword.

Beyond door are beasts.

I fight.

Beasts die.

That’s all.

*Creeeak-*

Slowly pulled shelf aside.

Barricade gradually moved.

Grabbed other shelf blocking door.

*Scraaape-*

Light snack boxes dragged along floor.

Stopped.

One more pull and the path clears.

Beyond lies a child……

……No.

Beyond lies a beast.

Stood staring at door.

Closed mouth, deep breath, kept staring.

“…Hup!”

Yanked shelf violently.

*Crash!* Boxes tumbled.

“Kyaaaak! Kyaaak!”

Door shuddered open.

Bodies pushed inward from outside pressure.

Gripped sword with both hands, watching door.

*Creeeak-*

Door opened.

Bodies spilled in.

Simultaneously, dark shadow lunged inside.

Acceleration!

[Auto-cast: Acceleration]

“Kyaa-a-a-“

Cat-like posture of a small……

Tiny beast charging in.

Moving slowly mid-air.

Eyes unfocused, aimless.

Raised sword.

Rested on forearm, inhaled.

“…Hup!”

Thrust forward.

*Crack!*

Pierced through temple.

…Went in easier than adults.

Closed eyes without even pulling sword free.

“–Aa-ahk!”

*Crash!*

Small beast hit wall face-first.

Sword embedded in skull wobbled *ting ting* on floor.

“…………”

Silence.

Quiet.

Just stood there.

Stared at floor, breathing slowly.

…Stop thinking.

I live, they die.

That’s all.

Deep breath.

Looked outside.

Empty snack displays, half-destroyed shelves visible.

Bent down, grabbed sword hilt.

Stepped on small beast’s head.

Pulled sword free.

*Pop!*

Blood gushed out.

“…………”

Raised eyes.

Stared at wall.

Sword……

Drenched red with blood.

Reflecting light unnaturally.

Wiped blade on dead man’s apron.

…Not cleaning well.

…How do you maintain swords?

…Water okay…?

Slow blinks while cleaning.

Then stood up slowly.

Inhaled.

Sheathed sword at waist.

Took baton crusted with blood and hair, attached to belt.

Collected both swords and baton, then lifted large axe.

…Heavy.

Looked outside.

Quiet.

Stepped over corpses leaving storage.

[Level increased by 3]

…Level 21 now.

Good.

Added 3 to Stamina – now 18.

Big mart’s impossible now.

Even small ones are too much.

Used Acceleration four times already, stamina nearly depleted.

Rest properly before heading out again.

Grabbed fresh fruit packs, yogurt, bread, ramen from convenience store into bag.

…Halmae.

Asked for chili powder and anchovies.

Try smaller stores, not big marts.

After resting, neighborhood markets should be manageable.

Hefted bulging bag, left store.

What time is it?

Afternoon. Maybe 4 PM?

Can make dinner.

…Let’s go back.

***

Dinner was warm.

Halmae, Suhyeon, Ye-eun, So-eun didn’t fuss over my bloodstained appearance.

When I said they’d have to wait for the chili powder and anchovies, Halmae nodded with a sad smile.

“You worked hard, boy. So hard.”

The women never asked what I did outside, how many I killed, who they were.

As if outside events stayed outside, unrelated to here. Finished dinner smiling.

Feels like escapism.

But comforting.

Outside is hell, yet here we discuss bean sprout salad flavors.

Suhyeon was the proactive one.

Engineering student used to male environments – has that vibe.

While Ye-eun studied Japanese and So-eun drew manga, Suhyeon tore apart closets to barricade windows.

Definitely useful.

While I “worked” outside, she fortified our home with tools I brought.

Good partnership.

Feels and moans were nice too.

Lay in attic thinking this.

Gained 10 levels today.

Killed 10 today.

No, 10 beasts.

I keep reflexively humanizing them – shouldn’t.

They’re not human, not alive.

They’re “heads”, not “people”.

Not worthy of emotion or communication.

Right.

Still awkward.

Unconsciously seeing them as people.

Gradually.

Need to shed emotions bit by bit.

Gets easier with each kill.

One thing’s clear – even at 10 levels, I’m weak. Must keep leveling, keep killing.

…Alright.

Next morning, fully recovered, left home.

Target: neighborhood market.

Not convenience store side – opposite direction.

Into detached house alleys.

Walked quietly through silent streets.

Occasional growls from houses.

Some turned inside, slaughtering whole families.

No idea how many beasts appeared when apocalypse began.

Must’ve been countless.

Explains global collapse in days.

Market appeared.

…Huh?

Rustling sounds.

Slowly drew sword.

*Sshing*

Approached cautiously.

Through window – large man inside.

Big build.

…Probably beast.

Entered slowly with sword.

Awning hid my shadow.

*Rustle rustle*

…Huh?

Large man in t-shirt and black jeans stuffing ramen into bag.

Only see his back, but clearly…

He’s picking up items.

Not a beast.

Scanned store, spoke low:

“Hey.”

*Jump!*

Man startled, whirled around.

Holding monkey wrench.

Tool… has blood on it?

“Y-you, k-k-killed, who, who.”

Big but terrified, shaking.

Lowered sword slightly, showed palms.

“I’m human. Not… one of those beasts. Here for food.”

Man had scruffy beard.

Days without shaving.

Sweating, chin trembling.

Panting while staring.

…Did he hear me?

“Here for food. Same as you. Put that down.”

Pointed at shaking wrench. Man stuttered:

“Y-you, w-with weapon, telling m-me, drop. Y-you’ll stab me!”

…Fucking hell.

Too scared, this ahjussi.

Could just use Acceleration and stab him if needed.

Slowly sheathed sword.

“Okay? No names or addresses. Just food. You take yours, I’ll take mine. Got it?”

Glanced outside for threats while speaking.

Man relaxed slightly when I sheathed sword, lowered wrench.

Still sweating, trembling.

Side-eyed him while entering slowly. Ready to Acceleration-stab if he attacks.

He side-eyed back, reached for ramen.

Passed shelves to inner room – bedding and TV.

Really old-school market.

Haven’t seen one like this in ages.

True neighborhood store.

Inside – halmae face-down.

Bleeding from head.

Skull properly smashed.

Glanced at man.

Must’ve been him.

With the wrench.

…Well, makes sense.

Checked shelves for chili powder.