Chapter 80

 

“Sure.”

“Sure what?”

Vivian’s words, spoken after meeting me for the first time in a while, were razor-sharp.

Fearing she might kill me in an instant, I clumsily gathered my mana and clung to Ivan.

Ivan whimpered in fear.

Losing my skeletons would be unfortunate, but I knew I could easily replace them by wandering through more villages and encountering vagrants and deserters.

Just as I was about to chant a spell to escape to my hideout, Vivian spoke to me.

“Don’t run away. You said you wanted to talk, didn’t you?

You’ve sent countless people to deliver the message to me—asking for a conversation.”

“So, you’re finally willing to talk?

You didn’t care to listen to a single word back when I was powerless and helpless.”

Vivian stared at me for a long moment before letting out a sigh.

“Should I call you milady or something? Anyway, let’s hear it.

Why have you and Evan gone so far, killing people left and right?

I didn’t know Johannes was such a despicable bastard, but you even burned the Emperor alive.”

So, the Emperor was burned to death.

Good.

I didn’t want to witness his disgusting demise anyway.

“I have to do this to survive. If the Emperor’s dead, that’s one problem solved.

But you’re not going to let Evan and me live, are you?”

Vivian didn’t respond. She simply ground her teeth together.

After a long silence, she finally spoke.

“Even after all you’ve done, you still want to live?”

Without hesitation, I answered, “Yes.

Even if Evan and I haven’t seen each other in years, we know we’re both alive. And because of that, we still have hope.”

Vivian scoffed at my response.

She looked different from when I’d last seen her at the academy. She’d grown stronger, more formidable.

Her face radiated beauty, and her body—her chest and hips—fit the definition of femininity.

As I glanced at her chest and then downward, I couldn’t help but think that even if I mocked her, she’d probably just laugh it off.

“Sure, right. Limping witch.”

“So that’s what they’re calling me these days?”

“You’ve killed so many people.

Didn’t you think you’d earn a nickname by now?

A limping, silver-haired, dark mage riding a one-eyed dog—and with a beautiful face to boot. Of course, people are talking about you.”

“Well, that’s lucky for me.

Because of that, I’ve managed to receive a few letters from Evan.

Though I can’t meet him because you’re still surrounding the city walls and blocking magic.”

“Enough with the pointless chatter.”

“Pointless? You’re the ones wasting time.”

Vivian tilted her head slightly, as if in disbelief.

“Just let Evan and me go.

We don’t have any grand ideology or anything like that.

If you let us, we’ll live quietly, holed up somewhere.”

“Do you really think that’s possible?”

“Do you think you can actually conquer the capital?

You’re sending living soldiers, but the ones defending the walls are skeletons.

And every time your soldiers die, the skeletons only multiply.”

I conjured a small fireball and tossed it at Vivian’s feet.

Dust scattered, and the flames fizzled out.

“Even when you throw your grand magic around sometimes, it doesn’t matter.

If Evan were really in danger, he’d find a way to escape.”

I pulled out a cigarette and stuck it in my mouth.

I’d recently found a cigar, and since I didn’t have any fancy scents to coat it, I’d tried using sweet potato essence. It turned out to taste surprisingly good, so I kept smoking it.

Offering Vivian one, I held it out with two fingers.

She stared at it for a long time before smacking it away.

I picked it up, brushed off the dirt, and tucked it back into my pocket.

“What? Am I wrong?

You came to me for a conversation because you’re out of options.

The chance to resolve this peacefully has already passed.”

Vivian frowned at my words and said, “What do you mean by passed?”

Interrupting her, I replied,

“I was almost raped, and Evan dealt with the bastard. That should’ve been the end of it.

Even if it seemed suspicious, even if you couldn’t accept it.

All we wanted was to kill the Crown Prince and then flee somewhere quiet to live in peace.”

“And do you think anyone would believe that?

Erica, Erica von Mecklenburg. Look at yourself.

You used to look so innocent, but now anyone can see you’re a wicked dark mage.

Your silver hair is filthy with dried blood, your face is covered in dirt, and you reek of blood just by standing near.

And that missing left foot… Damn it, I should’ve taken all of you back then.”

In response, I wiggled my right foot mockingly.

“Why not take my right foot this time? I’ll run away for you again.”

But there was no point.

We’d been through too much for a simple gesture to change anything.

At best, we merely raised our voices and threw harsh words at each other. Vivian knew that if she tried casting a spell to capture me, I’d escape immediately, so she simply hurled curses instead.

“Evan and you must face judgment.

Your limbs will be torn apart, burned, and cursed like so many others. You’ll bleed and die slowly.

How could just two people—two!—create such a horrific mess…”

Maybe the world itself is to blame, for being so fragile that just two people with different intentions could create this chaos.

“I was sick of it.

Utterly, disgustingly sick of it.”

For a moment, I found it hard to breathe.

“A curse? Yeah, I got one. I already received it before you even mentioned it!”

Vivian didn’t react much to my outburst. She’d likely seen too many people screaming and raging at her by now. 

She didn’t show the fresh, vulnerable reactions I remembered from our academy days.

“Yeah, my limbs? I’ve already had them torn apart once.

Johannes ripped them off and scorched them with fire, that bastard.

Then he poured drugs into my nose, saying I might die if it hurt too much.”

Vivian’s response was indifferent.

“You said you wanted to talk. Did you seek me out just to spout nonsense?”

I conjured water in the air, scattering it to illustrate the memory I was about to recount.

Whether it was real or not, Vivian would know better than I did.

One of my outstretched arms was severed and burned. Then the other three limbs were cut off and scorched in turn. The Crown Prince—no, the Emperor’s—fingers came into view before the memory went completely black.

Vivian stared at the now-darkened vision, her disbelief evident. Then she looked down at me, sitting on the ground.

She seemed flustered, as if the conversation had veered completely off course.

What was supposed to be a negotiation had turned into an accusation.

“You don’t think I’ve experienced it? Hah. You don’t think I’ve gone through all that?

Don’t stand there looking down at me. Sit down, you miserable wretch.”

Vivian grimaced slightly but sat down in front of me as I demanded.

“Good. Ignore the smoke, even if it’s suffocating. Listen to my story, no matter how boring it is.

I’ll tell you why I’ll disappear quietly if you just let me go.

I’ll explain why I’ve wrecked this world and why I supposedly deserve the curses you think I do. I’ll give you my excuses.”

The smoke was thick and dry.

I conjured water again, drinking deeply, and stared for a moment at a sprouted potato before popping it into my mouth and chewing.

At this point, eating something like this wouldn’t make me sick. That phase was long past.

“Alright, at first, I died because of you.”

“What do you mean by that…”

“Evan liked you.

It pissed me off so much that I hit you. Then Evan came to me and raised hell.

And as luck would have it, that cursed girl’s family crumbled completely.”

I drew the gun from my pocket.

Not that it would hit Vivian if I fired it.

“At first, I tried to kill myself by submerging my wrist in hot water, but it hurt too much.

So I picked up a gun and shot myself. But I couldn’t even die properly.

All I managed to do was put a hole in my throat, bubbling with gurgling noises until I eventually died.

Alone, where no one could see.”

The bathtub water, stained red with blood, came into view.

As time passed, the memory faded to black.

“Do you think showing me this and telling me your story will make me let you and Evan go?” Vivian asked coldly.

“Of course not.

You imprisoned me at your side until the day I burned to death in front of you.

I wonder if you even felt anything then.”

I poked Vivian with my finger.

The vaunted mage sat there without resisting.

“I can’t even count how many times I’ve died because of you.

I’ve tried to convince myself it’s because I’m weak, but I just can’t.

From my family’s collapse to why I couldn’t live normally at the academy.

The people who clung to you suffocated me, stopped me from doing anything.

And when I tried to escape the torment, they shoved me back into it.

Even when I tried to hide, they dragged me out.

Am I rambling? Yeah, I am. It’s long-winded. It’s been too long.

Why do I keep dying and returning to stand here in front of you? Is it that disgusting to you?”

My throat tightened as I spoke.

“I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore.

But whatever curse you think I deserve, whatever punishment for the guilty, I’ve already been through it.

I never committed any great sins.

Yet the more people I kill, the farther death seems to drift away from me.”

Vivian’s expression remained blank, but her lips trembled slightly.

“What do you think? Doesn’t it seem better to just let me go?”

It was as if she realized things had strayed far from the scenario she had imagined.

Ah, how detestable.