episode_0177

– I’ll come pick you up tomorrow.

When asked why, Yoonji replied that she missed me.

Even though I had informed her of our breakup, Yoonji said she would come to pick me up.

I wasn’t completely clueless.

Her words hinted that our relationship had not reached its end.

Before I knew it, I just replied, “I understand.”

“I don’t know what’s what anymore.”

It’s just complicated.

If they had approached me for money, it would have been easier to deal with.

But knowing that wasn’t the case, and seeing them refuse my rejections, it was just confusing.

“….”

I felt like I was being pushed around.

I also felt like I wasn’t being true to myself.

Before MT ended, it was necessary to clearly sort out our relationship.

I also felt like I wanted to talk to someone and get advice in this ambiguous situation.

So, as I was looking through my contacts, wondering if there was anyone I could call.

“What are you doing?”

Kim Gyua approached me quietly.

I wondered why a first-year student council member was outside.

“I just came out.”

He answered without me asking.

“You can find the restroom over there.”

“….Your manners are seriously lacking.”

Why would there be any other reason for coming out?

I thought he would leave once he saw that I was going to the restroom.

But Gyua continued to stay by my side.

“Why.”

As he subtly asked what the problem was, Gyua couldn’t help but ask.

“You told the seniors to stop, right?”

“How did you know?”

“I heard you talking to Seo and Arin seniors earlier when we were eating meat.”

He has sharp ears.

He probably knows what responses I received as well.

Although I was pondering my worries, I didn’t want to confide in Gyua.

I just wanted him to leave me alone.

But it seemed that Gyua had other plans.

“How could you do that?”

With a look of disbelief, Gyua questioned me.

“In the end, the seniors are walking on thin ice. It’s not much different from me.”

“Did you pick a fight?”

“But how could you do that? If I mess up, I get scolded, called a bad girl, and sometimes even hit.”

Yet, despite all that, you haven’t given up on being friends with several people.

“I feel really frustrated about something.”

“What’s frustrating?”

“A little… when I look at the seniors.”

Gyua hesitated for a moment, then sighed deeply and kicked a pebble with his foot.

“Everything I’ve done so far feels like a fool’s errand.”

“….”

“So, I don’t like it. I don’t want to get closer to the seniors anymore.”

“Then don’t.”

Without waiting for a response, Gyua quickly turned and walked away.

The boy who had just been muttering that we were the same until a moment ago.

But after seeing me confess my breakup and get rejected, he seemed to feel a difference, be flustered, and jealous.

“Is that so.”

We’re not in a typical relationship.

With that thought, I felt a bit relieved.

“Let’s go back for now.”

I came back into the auditorium to see the ongoing chess match.

Some people were rushing forward, either for a break or to play another game.

Among them was Senior Juhee, who, upon seeing me, said it was perfect and dragged me along.

“Help me out for a bit, Woojin.”

“What?”

I was wondering what was going on.

It turned out that we were going to play a quiz game during the break, and Senior Juhee had somewhat forced me to participate.

“It’s just answering some quiz questions.”

“Oh, okay. That’s not too bad.”

It didn’t seem too difficult, so I stood in front with Senior Juhee.

It seemed like everyone was paired up with someone of the opposite gender, but Senior Juhee was in a bind because she didn’t have a male partner to go with.

“Senior Juhee is a bit scary.”

Han River also had a tendency to be afraid of Juhee senior.

“Alright, the game we’re going to play this time is the Newspaper Game!”

Newspaper Game?

An Hyunho, holding the microphone, excitedly handed out newspapers to each team.

“The team that lasts the longest on the newspaper wins. As time goes on, fold the newspaper to make the area smaller.”

I’ve heard that they follow the games seen on entertainment shows at MT.

Since it was a game I had seen on entertainment shows, it wasn’t too difficult to accept.

At first, both teams could stand with both feet.

“Is it simpler than you thought?”

As I laughed and said that, Juhee senior pursed her lips and made an ambiguous expression.

“I didn’t expect to play this kind of game.”

At first, I wondered what it meant, but as I looked at the newspaper getting narrower, I felt like I understood now.

‘Ah.’

This gets a lot narrower than I thought.

Before I knew it, I was stuck close to senior.

Naturally, I ended up holding both of senior’s shoulders and sticking close to her.

The posture was not much different from a hug.

Maybe that’s why.

“Can you hug me just once?”

The request Juhee senior made to me that day echoed in my ears.

“I want to confirm whether I was mistaken or not.”

Juhee senior, who still didn’t know much about love, wanted a clear answer about her feelings.

It was a straightforward demand typical of Juhee senior in everything.

But I refused.

“Ha, if I knew it was this kind of game, I wouldn’t have called you.”

Juhee senior, who bowed deeply, muttered irritably.

“I’m sorry. I made you uncomfortable for no reason in front of the others.”

Juhee senior seemed unfazed. Yes, she was the usual Juhee senior.

Her breathing was rough.

Senior’s gaze kept avoiding me.

“Senior?”

When I cautiously called out to senior, who was bowing as if to escape, she tilted her head and looked at me.

In the flushed expression of senior, the words Yoonji had said to me just now came to mind again.

Love is not something that suddenly disappears.

It’s something you realize.

As I said before, I rejected senior’s hug, preventing her from giving an answer about her feelings.

But now.

In an unintentional situation, senior realized the answer.

Whether it was lucky or unlucky, I also learned it together.

This person was in love with me.

* * *

The next morning.

A pounding headache.

I was already in agony from the tremendous hangover as soon as I opened my eyes.

I heard that drinking soju at MT was a rule, but I never imagined I would drink this much.

And I had my own worries, so I ended up overdrinking with a narrow-minded thought that getting drunk would ease my mind.

Although I don’t usually get drunk on soju or beer, I ended up getting so drunk that I only remember collapsing in the 2nd and 3rd year boys’ room.

I had no contact with the girls separately.

At first, we naturally drank together, but before I knew it, we ended up drinking separately with boys and girls.

“Oh, man. What’s this?”

“I thought I was getting closer to the guys.”

In reality, because of that, the 2nd and 3rd year boys were complaining all morning with a grumpy face.

The boys were eating cup ramen for breakfast and hangover cure.

Sitting around together, it felt like we were in the military.

“Hey, are you okay?”

An Hyunho, who was sitting next to me eating cup ramen, asked me subtly.

The fact that my head was sticking up made me smile since the morning.

“What’s wrong.”

“What’s wrong. You got drunk yesterday. I heard that everyone went to sleep, but you just kept drinking alone?”

“Oh, did I?”

I drank a lot, but I don’t really know because I just drank alone without talking to others.

“I don’t know. I just drank.”

“Ha, I tried to go out with Gyu-ah yesterday. But he just drank a lot and passed out to go to sleep.”

“….”

When I stared at An Hyun-ho, he just looked at me without saying a word and stuck out his tongue.

“Why, don’t you want me to get close to Gyu-ah? Tell me the reason.”

“…Go ask him yourself.”

I thought Gyu-ah might be able to answer now.

So I just moved on and ate ramen.

After finishing the ramen and feeling refreshed, it was time to take a shower.

There were many bathrooms, and thanks to the kids who came out of the shower quickly, I was able to shower cleanly.

It felt refreshing to wash my tangled hair.

Now, as everyone prepared to leave, I saw Yoo Arin moving luggage on the first floor with a hood on.

He was still half asleep, packing his bags for the bus with sleepy eyes.

“Yoo Arin.”

When I called out to him, Yoo Arin looked at me blankly and stuck out his tongue.

“Did you drink last night? I couldn’t find you even if I tried.”

“In the guys’ room. We all drank together, but I practically drank alone.”

“Well, that’s better. If you had said you drank with other girls, I would have killed you.”

“…Wait, let me see.”

“Why again? Wasn’t the conversation over?”

“It’s not over.”

When I spoke seriously, Yoo Arin followed me with an uncertain expression.

I sent a text to Seo Ye-rin in the middle, and met Choi Yiseo on the way and brought her along.

In the end.

Behind the empty pension.

Three people standing in front of me.

Putting their hands in their pockets or crossing their arms. They were nervous about why I called them.

“It’s awkward to gather like this.”

“…Agreed.”

At Yoo Arin’s grumbling, Choi Yiseo also nodded slightly.

Seo Ye-rin seemed to be yawning sleepily, but her eyes were clearly fixed on me.

“Why did you call us? We have to catch the bus soon.”

Seo Ye-rin’s question drew everyone’s gaze back to me.

My heart pounded.

My hands were sweaty and my breathing seemed to quicken slightly.

Clutching my fist, I faced the three of them and spoke.

“My father told me that I’m selfish and greedy. That I’m just satisfying my own desires by breaking up with Yoonji and dating other girls.”

“…Your father?”

Yoo Arin’s use of the term made the other two glare at her, but I continued, ignoring them.

“He said I’m selfish and greedy. That’s what he thinks of me. So I tried to choose one of you, but-”

I failed.

I couldn’t choose anyone.

So instead, I decided to let go of everyone.

Because that was the opposite of what my father thought of me.

Everyone looked at each other in confusion at my words.

They seemed unsure of what I was trying to say.

“But that thought occurred to me. In the end, maybe I’m just a puppet in my father’s hands. Maybe I’m not the Kim Woojin he read about.”

My father’s words had planted a seed inside me, growing rapidly.

“But when I asked you to stop yesterday, you all refused.”

I clenched my fist tightly.

A burning sensation ignited in my chest.

Should I say it felt like breaking out of a shell?

The shackles my father had placed on me seemed to be loosening.

“I realized that denying my father’s words wasn’t the right way for me.”

So I’m going the opposite way.

More greedy, more selfish.

A bright smile spread across my lips.

When I realized that it was a giant that far exceeded what my son had expected.

I was truly curious about what expression my father would have.

And with confidence, I finally felt like I was wearing clothes that suited the person I am.

“So.”

I reach out my hand.

Although it is not directed towards any of the three.

My outstretched hand clearly contained determination and will.

“I truly love all three of you.”

Now I can finally say it.

The bright smile on my face contained an inexplicable sense of relief.

* * *

Slowly opening my eyes, the first thing that greeted me was the throbbing pain throughout my body.

‘What’s this.’

I peeked around as I opened my eyes, seeing people in hospital gowns and nurses.

As I quietly got up, not having any tubes stuck in me, a nurse happened to come over.

“Oh, you’re awake? The doctor will come and explain, but don’t worry too much, there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with your body.”

“….”

Oh, I remembered.

I got hit really hard.