episode_0099

“Is this enough?”

After finishing the household chores and taking a light shower, I realized it was already midnight.

It was a time when energy overflowed, but since there was nothing to do, I settled into the soft, fluffy bed.

“…What should I do now?”

A dilemma that felt like a terrible curse for a modern person.

As I tossed and turned in bed, I found myself sinking into a swamp of thoughts.

“I’ve cleaned up almost all the posts on the community… I don’t feel like reading novels or watching animations…”

Should I read some webtoons that I’ve missed? I thought as I entered the site.

But after watching a few episodes, I quickly got bored and ended up throwing my phone far away, staring blankly at the ceiling.

“I’m bored.”

Being alone in the quiet studio apartment felt strange.

It wasn’t a big deal to be alone when I first started living alone with Jaehyuk five months ago.

But now, why did Jaehyuk’s absence make the studio apartment feel empty and lonely?

“Is it because I’ve gotten too used to having him around?”

Maybe that’s the case.

I spend most of my waking hours with him every day, over 9 hours.

Honestly, it’s more strange not to feel lonely when he’s not around.

“…Maybe we’re really dating without realizing it.”

I let out a deep sigh and buried my face in the pillow.

Then, I rolled around on the bed, letting out a weak groan.

“Becoming lovers with that guy…”

I never thought it was a possibility.

Many things have changed since becoming a vampire.

Because of those changes, I couldn’t be sure of anything anymore.

The sense of loss as something that made up ‘me’ disappeared day by day.

And the fear of gradually becoming someone else.

With the self possibly not being maintained, how could I confidently say that?

Yes, for these reasons, I considered the possibility.

But now that possibility was becoming a reality, I was quite confused.

“They say familiarity is the scariest thing…”

I want to keep denying it.

That I don’t like him, that we’re just friends.

I want to brainwash myself and treat him casually as before.

But now it was impossible.

I realized that my feelings when Jaehyuk was with another woman were jealousy.

Even with his playful jokes, my heart fluttered.

And the empty space left by his absence felt so lonely and desolate.

“How… is that possible?”

Frustration built up, and a sigh escaped involuntarily.

Heat rose to my face, and I started feeling dizzy.

“…Maybe I should go for a night walk for a change.”

Maybe if I step outside for a bit and breathe in the fresh air.

Will the frustration, confusion, and intrusive thoughts disappear?

After a moment of contemplation, I slowly got up from bed and started changing my clothes.

Just for a moment.

For a change of mood.

—–

Even if it’s mentioned several times in the news, how famous could one become?

Jaehyuk had insisted on wrapping up tightly before going out, but I ignored his words and left the studio apartment in casual attire.

Even if someone recognizes me and approaches me on this ambitious night, it didn’t seem like there would be many.

And if I make a mistake, it’s not like there’s no way to escape, you know.

“I haven’t committed any crime, so there’s no need to hide.”

Exiting my studio apartment building, as expected, a quiet alley welcomed me.

It’s been a long time since I walked to school.

Silently reminiscing about the events of the first semester, I started walking towards the campus.

“Maybe it’s because of the vacation, but it seems even quieter than back then.”

On the way to the campus, there was nothing to worry about.

Except for the occasional zombie trudging home, unable to handle excessive drinking or showing off what they ate to others.

The situation that Jaehyuk had expressed concern about never occurred even once.

Well, isn’t that natural?

Time is time, and place is place.

It’s not normal for such a situation to happen.

“I’m glad there’s no confusion. I wanted to rest in the quiet atmosphere.”

Walking endlessly, feeling the cool night air, I found myself at the campus before I knew it.

Passing through the main gate, the dark path warmly welcomed me.

For a vampire, it was the perfect environment for a nighttime stroll.

Without hesitation, I walked into the darkness, starting to wander the path with no particular thoughts.

“Nice.”

The faint sounds of insects and the loud chirping of cicadas echoed in the background.

Listening to the serene summer concerto, my cluttered mind began to clear up.

“…Have I been living without any leisure?”

Pausing for a moment, I stared blankly at the brightly shining moon.

Come to think of it, I’ve never complained about how difficult things were.

I’ve only listened to others’ complaints, never sharing my own.

Perhaps the sudden night stroll today was because everything was falling apart inside me.

With a bitter smile, I confided in the trees lining the street about the hardships I’ve endured.

It may seem crazy to others if there were anyone around, but who cares? There wasn’t a single soul in sight.

And so, slowly unraveling the tangled threads, I began to bring out the buried thoughts one by one.

“Why did I have to become a trashy species like a mutant… Damn it! Fine if I become trash! But why do I have to detach my damn dick!!!”

“I… I’m struggling too!!! Do you know how hard it was to adapt!? Ah… damn it… seriously, damn it!!!!!”

“Why do vampires have to follow the canon so well! If you’re going to follow the canon, then make other species follow it too!!! Damn it! I’ll get pissed off! It’s like a meteor shower!!!!!”

“Yoon Jaehyuk, you, ah… really, ah… ugh…!”

“Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!”

After screaming at the sky, I collapsed on a nearby bench, exhausted.

My throat was parched.

But with a relieved feeling, a pleasant smile spread across my face.

Pouring out everything that had been built up.

Looking up at the night sky with a faint sense of euphoria, I slowly got up.

“…Embarrassing.”

Even though I made sure there was no one around before yelling, wasn’t this too much of a nuisance?

And what if there had been a sentient being that I didn’t sense?

“I… I should go back quickly.”

As the relief faded, a sudden rush of shame overwhelmed me.

Checking my surroundings once again, just as I was about to leave…

“It seems like you’ve been through a lot. I can feel the sadness in your voice.”

“Ah…?”

A mysterious woman appeared out of nowhere, tears in her eyes, and approached me, patting my back.

Who are you?

No, more importantly.

Did she hear everything I just yelled? I was too stunned to think clearly.

After a moment, I managed to gather my wits and started looking around, trying to find a way out of this mess.

As they say, people shouldn’t do things they’re not used to.

Damn it.

——

“Ugh, I feel like I’m going to die. How is every moment peak hour?”

“I know, I told them that Jiwoo isn’t here… why do the customers keep coming?”

3 am, a time when I would usually be relaxing and cracking jokes.

Still seeing a crowd of customers, the owner let out a sigh with a tired expression on his face.

“Wait, isn’t today Monday? Shouldn’t we be working tomorrow? Why are we still hanging around here?”

“…Well, maybe they’re just free-spirited people? Or maybe they’re college students. It’s summer vacation right now, isn’t it?”

“This is driving me crazy, seriously. Even if the staff is too competent, it’s a problem? Business is booming even if we just sit still!”

“If self-employed people hear that, they’ll throw rocks at you, boss.”

“The reason for running a business is different! Those people are making a living! I’m doing this for fun!”

After a moment of frustration, the owner put down the knife and rested his head on the table, pretending to cry.

But then, as if struck by a brilliant idea, he suddenly burst into laughter like a clown and started reading the menu.

“Yeah, it’s a structure that can only become more popular. Attractive staff, cheap cocktails made with good ingredients, and a well-decorated place with a good atmosphere.”

“…Boss?”

“If I don’t change anything… the customers will keep increasing. Then this place will no longer be a bar, but a restaurant, hehe.”

What on earth is he trying to do?

As I turned my gaze away from making a Dirty Martini, the boss, as if making a big decision, looked at me and opened his mouth.

“Jaehyuk.”

“Yes, boss.”

“What do you think about doubling the price of cocktails? Maybe we can fleece the ants this way?”

…Judging by that proud expression, it seems like he thinks that’s a brilliant idea.

I let out a deep sigh and told the boss the truth, looking into his twinkling eyes.

“Boss.”

“What?”

“Even if we double the price, it’s still cheaper than what other cocktail bars are selling, you know?”

“…Ah, right. That’s true.”

A truly bizarre and unprecedented dilemma of needing to reduce customers instead of increasing them.

The so-called ‘fleecing the ants debate’ continued until the end of the workday.