episode_0011

Wow… Wow… Wow… What was that? I… I think I had a really big dream… but I can’t remember. I can’t remember what happened in my dream, how I crawled to bed after putting a chair in front of the table and drinking yesterday… I can’t remember anything.

This is why I don’t drink, but yesterday, Elysia, who has been my friend since I was a baby, brought me 58-year-old champagne, which is not a regular drink, and I couldn’t even say I didn’t want to drink it, so I took whatever was given to me… Did I get drunk and just do it? Still, maybe because it’s an expensive alcohol, unlike low-quality alcohol like soju or beer, I don’t feel dizzy as soon as I wake up, which is nice…

“Kyaa… Kyaaa?!”

As I raised my upper body, I realized too late that I was not wearing anything, so I made a loud noise, grabbed the blanket with my hand, pulled it up, covered it up to my neck, and shivered. It’s not something you think about and put into action. I just had no choice but to take that action instinctively.

“My, why did I… really give the injection?”

In the original world, I knew very well that I was weak at drinking, so I avoided drinking as much as possible, and even if I did happen to drink, I would pay attention to the people gathered in the same place and pretend to swallow a sip, and I used my skill to throw away alcohol, and even though I did that. I’ve never administered an injection, which involves throwing away all the clothes I’m wearing because I’ve made a habit of it in case I lose my mind…

After coming to this world, did he become vulnerable not only to women but also to alcohol? Anyway, being naked is too much. I’m glad there was no one else there but Elysia. If there had been anyone else… I would have lost my virginity.

When I was in college, I saw guys who took new female juniors to drinking parties to try to seduce them, and I thought to myself that inferior colored people were being so damned instead of trying to study hard like me and become ‘honorary white people’, but I almost ended up being the female junior in that story. That’s right. I fucking hate it.

As I was burying myself under the blanket, sticking out my neck, and wondering what the hell was going on, Elysia wearing an apron walked from the kitchen…

“Why are you wearing only an apron on your naked body?”

So manly! Shame! Take any clothes out of my closet and wear them right now! You pervert!… I was in no shape to shout, so I had no choice but to swallow the words that rose up in my throat along with my saliva. Elysia didn’t seem to know if she knew how I felt, but she spoke with a calm expression.

“Paula, are you awake? I heard you sleep so well that you don’t even notice a ghost carrying you… Aren’t you tired? Since I don’t have any plans until the day I plan to take the train anyway, I can sleep more if I want.”

“I’m not tired… But did I really sleep so deeply that I didn’t react even if someone touched me?”

“Uh. He wanted to take off his clothes before going to sleep, so I stopped him, but he stubbornly took off all his clothes and crawled into bed. I couldn’t leave you alone and go back to my room… I felt embarrassed if I woke up and you were the only one naked, so I lay on the same bed naked too, and then got up first and made breakfast.”

“Ugh… You looked so embarrassed.”

It sounds very suspicious that he got into the same bed naked so that I wouldn’t be embarrassed… but other than that, there’s nothing worth pointing out. There are people who actually have a tendency to take their clothes off, and I could be one of them.

Just because I in the original world was the type to just fall asleep quietly when I got drunk doesn’t mean I have to be a quiet person in this world too. Even if there is such a law, there is no need to know about it, as it will be useless a few years from now when your Excellency the President takes power and passes the Enabling Act.

“But just because I took off my clothes, was it necessary for you to take off your clothes too and come up on the bed? It’s just… Even if you saw me sleeping and went back to your room, you wouldn’t have said anything.”

“Hey, that can’t happen between us. And women can take off their clothes and sleep under the same blanket, isn’t that right?”

“Uh… Is that so? Is that so…?”

For a moment, I thought back to the memories of when I was a man (although I am still a man in spirit). At that time, I was with the same assholes (and colored people who are far inferior to white people)… Wow! Well, that’s it! I… can’t handle the disgust of this imagination!

The world of men is like this, but is the world of women different? Do women normally think it’s okay to show their naked bodies to their friends and sleep in the same bed? You should know that I was once a woman. Although there remain memories of the being who was originally the owner of this body, these are not ‘my’ memories, so they are unsuitable for use as reference. I feel like I’m observing a third party that has nothing to do with me from afar, so what do I refer to?

Instead of getting too worked up about a problem that I can’t find an answer to by thinking hard, I should get dressed first. You have to get dressed before you get out of bed or not.

“Hey, can you get me some random clothes from the closet?”

“Once again… Are you embarrassed? It’s not difficult to give it to you, but…”

Elysia tilted her head but did as I asked. In order not to show my naked body to Elysia, I didn’t get out of the blanket, but instead whimpered inside, somehow getting dressed. As I walked towards the kitchen in everyday clothes that I would wear in the winter, the smell of the food that Elysia had prepared wafted in the air.

“This is a pork cutlet… right? There must not have been any ingredients in my room. Did you go out and buy them?”

“Uh. Since I can’t eat the chicken I ate last night again, I bought pork. Did you want to eat something else?”

“…It’s nothing.”

Going out and buying cooking ingredients means that you went out wearing street clothes, came back, took them off again, and put on an apron over them. You perverted girl… do you think I’ll be taken over just because I do that?

I sat down and took the cutlet that Elysia had touched with my fork and put it in my mouth. The fried batter on the surface of the cutlet is nice, and Elysia’s thin side breasts in the naked apron look are really delicious… Gulp… So, honestly… I can’t help but notice the volume that doesn’t die even when she’s wearing an apron.

The side view is also side view… It’s clear that she’s wearing no bra since the bra straps aren’t visible on her collarbone and back, but just once… I really want to put my hand in there and rub it just once…

Me, I’m a bitch… No, you, what are you thinking about while you’re eating! Are breasts that look as soft as a baby’s cheeks and nipples that are pink (now they are the same color as Elysia’s hair!) and nipples hidden by the apron, food? Well… it might be a different story if breast milk comes out… Damn. Once you think dirty thoughts, useless thoughts keep coming.

Even though I tried to think of something healthy, I kept going down a different path, and in this vicious cycle where once a dirty thought occurred to me on the path I was on, I started to do one naughty thing after another, and suddenly I heard a voice of salvation from outside.

smart.

“What is it? Was there anyone who would come find me? I’ll go out on my own for now, Elysia. You… no. It’s here.”

“What, bland. Bring it quickly.”

I quickly walked over, opened the door, and looked to see who was there…what was it? There’s no one, right? Is this the belt tutu or something? While I was thinking that, I suddenly heard a soft voice coming from a place much lower than an adult’s eye level.

“Why not!”

I lowered my head and looked down, and only then was I able to see the visitor’s face. The visitor was a girl with black hair and red eyes like me… Did she just say ‘Hello!’ to me? Elysia was too embarrassed to show it to others, so I left her behind. Seeing that she bowed politely while looking at me, I guess she said hello to me. But who is it?

“Sister, don’t you remember me? Hey, it’s Bryn!”

A mysterious girl who introduces herself in a lively voice as if trying to answer my questions.

Bryn… Bryn… Ah. Like Elysia, she was related to the being who originally owned this body. Was she such a kind person that she volunteered at an orphanage? I may have been an ‘excellent person’ (I originally entered engineering school at Seoul National University with grades that qualified me for medical school and studied at an Ivy League university in the US as an exchange student), but I was not a ‘good person’.

If I were to cut out all the details and just get to the main point among the memories that came to mind, I would say that in the 1920s, when the German economy was in a downward spiral due to the massive war reparations stipulated in the Treaty of Versailles and the Great Depression that started in the U.S., parents abandoned their children and ran away, saying they could not raise them. There was a lot of work going on… ‘I’ felt sorry for the children who had been separated from their parents and visited the orphanage.

I didn’t just visit once and then stop going. I wanted to live on my own before entering the military academy, so I visited regularly until I got a room here and built a close relationship with the children at the orphanage. Most of the children at the orphanage followed ‘me’ well, but among them, there was one girl who only liked ‘me’.

When I told him to disappear from my sight, he cried and cried, and when I hugged him, he smiled and tried not to fall, as if asking me when he had cried.

The girl’s name was Brünhild. I heard that because they didn’t know his parents, he didn’t have a last name, but that the daycare center just randomly gave him the name Brünnhild. When I first saw him, Brünnhild was a newborn who couldn’t even open his eyes, but now…

“Unni Chakan, will you be my mother?”

…He grew up like this, and in front of me, he was introducing himself under the name ‘Breen’ instead of Brünnhild, which is difficult to pronounce with a baby’s oral structure. But what? What did you just say? Mom? Me?