episode_0094

It is difficult. What position do I occupy for Kylon, so why am I doing this?

It is said that the thing that can form the strongest bond between people is similarity.

Haven’t we already seen countless times where people come together because of their appearance and are ostracized because of their appearance?

Anyway, I could say that I have quite a few similarities and points of contact with Kailon.

The fact that they are the same possessor and that their hometown is the same Korea. Also, he had a lot of secrets and was prone to loneliness. I seriously thought about whether that might be what attracted me.

However, I knew very well that even though we were very similar in our loneliness, despite our similarities, I and I were walking down vastly different paths.

We also lived in Korea. But he was the daughter of a rich family, and I was just a son.

I woke up here as the same possessed person. However, he had a record of clearing this game and was a powerful warrior, and I opened my eyes as a saint who cleared the game and had a painful story of only being saved without ever turning on the game even once.

We were both lonely, but she used what she had to meet people to ease her loneliness, and I was looking at the window with black tape on it.

It’s similar, yet so different.

He liked me because of the similarities between him and me, but I was the only one who knew that I saw the differences and kept a distance from him.

I couldn’t understand his feeling that people themselves were good.

In fact, I wonder who would not like something if someone said it was good, but in fact, it came to me so quickly that I thought it was natural that I couldn’t easily accept it.

Yeah, it seems like Kylon wants my answer too hastily.

But in the meantime, the reason I couldn’t say anything to Kylon was because I had to follow him to the ending.

But when I think about it, when I think back on the previous battle, I wonder if I could become a hero myself. I get to think about it.

When I thought about it, I narrowed my brows because it seemed like my holy sword was much more useful than the others, and it seemed like it was stronger than the holy sword that Kylon was wielding.

I was wondering if I could just go out and fight alone like this.

It doesn’t seem like it’s an issue that will stick with Kylon forever.

If I have this much power, wouldn’t even the king of the Holy Kingdom be able to touch me?

Isn’t it okay to be independent like this?

I felt a little calm.

As I glanced at Kailon’s face as if he was looking down at me, I let out a sigh and remembered his question again.

How should I answer the question of whether we can only be friends?

Before, I had only measured the answer several times and prepared for the wind that would blow later, but now that I was able to stand alone, I thought it would be okay to mix my opinion a little, so I moistened my parched lips.

“Yes, friend.”

“Why? Why am I… !”

“Kylon was a warrior, so I thought I should follow in his footsteps. But, if you think about it, unlike me, you didn’t desperately want to go home. So, I continue to feel sorry for encouraging you to be greedy.”

He continued speaking calmly.

Unlike me, who wanted to go home, I thought of Kailon, who seemed to have more fun exploring the colors here than going home.

I was silent as I wondered if it was right to continue to encourage him by calling him a hero like that.

I hesitated.

And the answer was, of course, ‘no’.

I wanted to go home, but I was a bad person for encouraging others and trying to punish them just because I lacked ability.

I didn’t know until now. I don’t even know if I had that kind of power.

Now that I have received revelation from the Goddess, and have prayed according to that voice, I now have a strength comparable to that of a warrior.

Even if that method was a little painful, I thought it was natural for me to throw myself into it to achieve what I wanted.

I looked straight into the eyes.

When I looked straight ahead while lying down on the bed, I saw Kylon’s face instead of the ceiling.

I looked at his face and continued speaking calmly.

“… So, if you don’t want to do it, you can stop here.”

“That’s not what I want to say right now.”

know. He knew very well that he wanted to ask me about my feelings. I didn’t know.

But that feeling did not change. Therefore, I answer like this.

If I was going to ruin everything like this, I thought it would be better for me to leave and let the hero go with his party and I go in the direction I wanted, so I opened my mouth.

“You know. But if you keep showing your feelings to me like this, what will happen to your feelings to those girls later? It will all be revealed. So it’s clear that this party will be meaningless. So, so that you don’t have a hard time… ”

“It’s not difficult at all!”

Kylon’s urging voice sounded scary.

“No, I did this for you, but why do you keep trying to distance yourself? Why are you… !”

Kailon’s sad feelings came one big step closer.

But strangely enough, I was not moved by those words.

Is it because I remember the first Kylon, or is it because I can’t understand the situation now, which is contrary to the way he said that it didn’t matter if it was a woman and that he was happy to come to this world?

I couldn’t quite figure it out.

But the important thing was that my heart wasn’t that moved, so I just stared calmly at Kailon’s face.

“… You say you like hugging women? You did that before.”

“At that time… ”

“I think you are having a harder time because of me. Because of me, your heart seems to be more torn. You probably came all the way here because of me. You could have just had sex and had fun in Seongguk. I’m sorry.”

It should have been done this way.

Since I had come such a long way, I had no choice but to apologize.

I thought I had to follow in Kylon’s footsteps because I was incompetent, but now that I don’t have to, I have no reason to prove myself necessary at this party, nor do I have any reason to stay by his side and encourage him.

Because I fully realize that I am the only one who wants to go home.

It’s natural for a thirsty person to dig a well, but I was the one who kept trying to make Kailon do it.

“Sorry.”

I put that apple in my mouth again.

There was no word from Kailon after that.

All I could see was Kylon’s eyes looking blankly and bewildered.

“… veronica. Do you want to say you’re going out to a party?”

Originally, I might not even go out.

‘Original Ramen’. So not now. It seems like you’re having a hard time because of me, because of me, you can’t figure out what to do, because of me, because of me, because of me, because of me, because of me, because of me, it’s all because of me.

He seemed to be having such a hard time that I felt like I had to leave.

Originally, I didn’t even think about doing this until I talked to Kylon.

I have to work hard today to help the kids and Kylon so we can get through this together. That was all I thought.

But now it was different. This was after hearing Kylon’s voice and face again asking why he didn’t have any feelings for me.

“… huh. I’ll go separately now. I might have the strength to become independent.”

There was no need to exert any effort in swinging the Morning Star.

There was no reason to try to aim the weapon at the enemy unconditionally.

I gained confidence because I was strong enough to simply hold a knife to my wrist and spray the blood that came out on both friend and foe.

“Kylon, I hope you don’t have any trouble. Because you are definitely a good person.”

So it was goodbye.

I should have done it this way from the beginning, but I felt sorry for encouraging him too much to make me feel more comfortable, which only remained as a heartbreaking mistake.

A sudden goodbye to Kailon and myself.

Will Kylon accept it?

Considering the interest he had already shown me, he might not have accepted it.

But he still respected my opinion, and no matter how much he wanted it, he would never touch my body based on my opinion, so I thought he would do the same this time too.

“No.”

But, I guess this time was different.

“No. no. I can’t send it anywhere.”

The voice was somewhat desperate, and the expression was stern.

“I said I was leaving the party because I didn’t want to see myself suffering… ? Are you leaving because I feel like it’s your fault that I’m lost? why? Have I ever told you that I’m having a hard time because of you? I just wanted to do what you wanted because I like you… !”

“… That’s because of me. It’s true that I’m the cause.”

“… … Why is it your fault that I do what I want to do?”

Even that feeling must have originated from my existence.

Because it was clear that it was for me that it came from me.

“I understand why you want to leave, but I can’t let you go.”

Kylon was resolute until the end.

This time, it seemed like my opinion was dismissed without any force.

“… I will destroy your power of independence.”