episode_0050
by fnovelpia“Eujin, let’s date me.”
After making a confession that made anyone think that I was ruined, I looked at Yujin’s feelings.
Of course, it was so sudden that Yujin was looking at me with surprised rabbit eyes.
The eyes that had been blinking ceaselessly stopped and Yujin opened her mouth with her usual expression.
“Is that a confession?”
“Huh?! uh… Right?”
“Who confesses like that?”
A heavy punch hit my solar plexus and my whole body froze.
As I realized that there was no confession more terrible than this, I let out a heavy sigh in my heart without stopping.
“I will first unpack and wash and then go to your house. Let’s talk again then.”
“Uh, yes. I understand.”
With those words, Yujin took a step forward.
Even though I didn’t hear a clear rejection, my heart ached as I watched the distance getting further and further away.
Because I had already accepted that I had failed to confess.
If it wasn’t a failure, there would be no reason for Eugene to say something like that.
I also returned home with heavy steps.
After I finished cleaning up and showering, my body moved on its own and I lay down on the bed.
Is it because of the fatigue of the trip, or the shock of the failed confession?
My body is just getting heavier for reasons I don’t know exactly.
***
When I returned home, I went straight into the bathroom. And as I was bathed in the warm water from the shower, I grabbed one side of my pounding chest.
Suddenly, not only did he hold my hand, he confessed that he wanted to date me.
I didn’t expect it at all.
Of course, I assumed something like this would happen someday, but I had no idea it would be today!!
“It’s really like Han Yu-chan.”
What kind of person would cut off the rest of a confession and only get to the point?
I couldn’t help but laugh when I thought that this was the image of Yuchan in his 30s that I was familiar with.
I don’t feel any animosity because the person I started to like again was Yu-chan in his 30s, not his 20s.
His attitude of treating me closer than a same-sex friend and never letting go of his interest and worries made my heart move again.
“How should I receive this?”
Even though it’s a confession that I don’t like, it hasn’t changed that I have a rational crush on Han Yu-chan.
Of course, I have anxiety about him.
Anxiety about what will happen if it happens again.
They say that both Yoo-chan and I have changed a lot compared to before, but we don’t know what will happen to people.
Even if you promise that you will never repeat it, there is a possibility that it will eventually happen again.
If it happens again…
After that, it was no longer possible to get our relationship back together.
That’s why I wanted to talk to Yuchan a little more and listen to him.
I also want to express my opinion about him.
***
I desperately hoped that I would be given one last chance, and waited until Eugene came.
My heart was burning endlessly to the point where it seemed like 1 minute passed by like 10 minutes.
“Why are you talking about how difficult it is to set the mood, idiot…? ”
I have come to like Yujin and already have experience with confession.
But why did I make such a rookie mistake?
This is the first time in my life that I have ever felt so resentful of myself.
-Dang!! Dang!! Dang!! Tiririk!!
While I was waiting for Yujin with a lot of tension, I heard the sound of the door lock opening and saw Yujin.
“Are you here?”
“Yes. Yuchan, would you like to come and sit for a moment?”
“Huh? Ah, I understand.”
I sat on the chair at the dining table and faced Yujin as if I was a criminal.
“I have a question for you. Are you serious about what you confessed to me?”
“I’m serious.”
“But why did you ask me out first without saying anything else first?”
“That’s… ”
This is why I feel like my face will turn red just telling it, but for now, telling the whole truth seems like a good option for me.
“I thought I should speak up when I got the chance.”
“So the time before we just broke up was an opportunity?”
“It wasn’t. I thought it was an opportunity when you came to my house and watched a movie.”
“Then why did you just confess?”
“It was so complicated in my head that I thought I should spit it out first and then look at it.”
The so-called sudden acceleration.
I couldn’t bear the continuing complexity.
Eugene, who heard my whole story, didn’t say anything for a while.
Yujin’s mouth, which seemed to be tightly closed, finally opened and I concentrated on listening to her every word.
“To be honest, I’m starting to like you too. It’s not that I didn’t like it at all.”
“Really? That’s good news to hear.”
“But there’s something that’s a bit tricky.”
“Caught? What is it?”
“The same moment is repeated. It takes a bit. I’m worried and scared.”
It’s completely understandable.
Even though we have experienced many things and become different from before, there is no such thing as 100% in life.
Even if it is only 1%, it is inevitable that you will hesitate as it is repeated.
“If it happens again, there is no turning back. If that happens, our relationship will become completely distant.”
“The relationship will be broken.”
“Of course, I don’t necessarily think that will happen. Because I know that you and I have changed a lot.”
“I know what you mean. I know why you are hesitating.”
As my rational liking for Yujin began again, I naturally became hesitant and fearful that the situation would repeat itself.
However, we learned a lot in the process of hurting each other and healing those wounds.
His attitude and behavior towards him have changed significantly.
“Eujin, to be honest, I can’t say for sure that that will never happen.”
“Yes, I don’t particularly feel bad about that. Because it’s natural.”
“But let me tell you this one thing clearly.”
“What?”
“I will fill in all the regrets and regrets that have arisen over the 14 years we have been together.”
They say there is no such thing as perfection in life, but you can make it closer to perfection.
Filling in the regrets and regrets that have arisen in the meantime.
That’s the way to get closer to perfection in my opinion.
“You mean to reduce the probability of repetition?”
“Yes, that’s what I mean.”
“Then let me ask you one more question. Why do you like me?”
“Even though our relationship got better again, I could see a new side of you instead of overlapping with the old one.”
“New look. That’s why.”
“And it was so much fun spending time with you. I want to continue that time in a new relationship.”
“Is this a new relationship rather than repeating the same relationship?”
“Of course, the romantic relationship itself is repetitive, but the elements that will be achieved within that romantic relationship will be new.”
Thinking it was my last chance, I told everything without hesitation, and a small smile appeared on Yujin’s face, who was only asking questions.
The moment I saw that smile, my continued anxiety completely disappeared.
At the same time, confidence arose.
“Promise.”
“Huh? What promise?”
“A promise to each other not to repeat the same thing.”
“Uh… ? then… ”
“Are you not going to make a promise? If you don’t hook your little finger, you go home.”
“I’ll bet!!”
I quickly hooked my little finger around Eugene’s little finger.
Even though it was such a simple act, my emotions welled up and I couldn’t control the corners of my mouth that rose.
“Please take care of me again, Yuchan.”
“Yes, please take care of me too. Eugene.”
Yujin linked her little finger and then took my hand.
It didn’t end with just holding hands, but the interlocking hands were intertwined at some point.
With our hands still clasped, Yujin stood up and strongly pulled my arm.
Of course, my body moved towards Eugene.
At the same time, Eugene.
hugged me With a very deep hug.
“Do you like me?”
“Yes, I like it.”
“Something funny. I’m sure I’ve been like this before, but it feels like the first time I’m hugging you.”
“Me too. It’s very awkward and new.”
“This doesn’t mean it’s repeated, but something new, right?”
“Yes, I will.”
Feeling new emotions and sensations, the two of us had no intention of leaving.
The hug that lasted for a while continued on the sofa, and Eugene’s strong hug continued like a panda hanging on a bamboo.
I also conveyed all my emotions in that hug.
“Eujin, I want to ask you something too.”
“Yeah, what is it?”
“Why do you like me?”
Since I spoke confidently, I thought Eugene would naturally tell me the reason.
“Secret.”
I didn’t tell him it was a secret and just laughed it off.
“Where is that? I said everything.”
“Women usually have a lot of secrets.”
“Just tell me that. The rest can be kept secret.”
“I’ll sleep at Yuchan’s house today.”
“No, I mean… uh?! What did you just say?”
“Yu-chan is sleeping at home.”
Even though I know that there is no need to take it as special since Eugene often sleeps over at my house.
Hearing those words in a different relationship than before.
It sounds quite different and gives off a strange feeling.
How should I take these words?
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