episode_0053

It was so cold that the frozen crystals scattered one after another.

Spring, which was supposed to come after winter, did not come.

There was only emptiness with nowhere to go, making the room feel lonely.

Now, Rheasian was the only one left.

Where did my father go, and where did my mother’s illusion disappear?

This thought didn’t even cross my mind.

The only being that dominated her mind was Camiel.

“You… Where did it go again?’

Standing still, he monologues blankly.

It’s vague. How can I find him now?

No, does it even exist in this world?

Without him, I have no reason to live… etc.

Hundreds of thoughts cluttered my distraught mind.

‘I can’t even guess where you might have gone.’

The world is wide. No matter how much you wander your whole life, there are places you cannot visit.

This was something she learned from books, but she knew it was true.

‘I have to find your traces in such a large place.’

More than anything, there is no need to say that fear is overwhelming.

I don’t know how long it will take to find him, but the time given to him will be far from enough.

‘What if I don’t meet you?’

Leasian had tears in her eyes.

As I thought that our current breakup was an eternal breakup, I resented myself for being so cruel to him in the past.

‘Why do I know you don’t have much time left to live… ‘Did he act like that?’

I couldn’t comfort him, it just tore his insides to pieces.

The one who had the hardest time must have been you… .

Is there anyone who is not afraid of dying?

Everyone is scared and afraid because they don’t know the details of their own end.

This was natural.

‘You must have been scared too… .’

So I couldn’t understand it any more.

How could Camiel do that?

Even though I knew my death long ago.

He was always smiling in front of himself, without showing any signs of hardship.

It would have been okay to complain and ask others to understand your pain… .

Kamiel carried everything alone.

When I looked at his back before, I felt that his shoulders were really broad.

However, thinking about it now, the burden on his heart was so heavy that it was difficult to lift it all on his shoulders.

‘I thought I’d like to lean on that shoulder.’

It was a truly immature thought that could have come from not knowing anything.

Leasian showed a self-deprecating smile.

‘You must have already found it difficult to walk alone. ‘I wanted to lean on something like that.’

Of course, Kamiel was so considerate that he gave up his seat, regardless of his difficult situation.

That’s probably why Rheasian’s complaints were readily accepted.

‘But I couldn’t have crossed the last line.’

That’s not because Kamiel doesn’t have enough time.

Rheasian seemed to know that it was only for the sake of the young lady he served.

‘If you… I guess so. ‘No matter how hard I tried, you would have been worried that I would be sad if you disappeared.’

Now I understand his feelings.

In fact, she felt the same way.

I don’t want my precious person, Kamiel, to get hurt.

Whether it’s body or mind.

‘Did I think I would break down? ?’

However, understanding did not mean that he accepted Leasian’s feelings.

It was an understanding within the realm of reason.

My heart was still protesting.

Why did you make that choice?

I wonder if he viewed me too softly.

but… .

If you looked at it that way, Kamiel was the correct answer.

‘that’s right. I’m angry, but… If I had known a little earlier that you were terminally ill, I would have done it now, no. Maybe I would have collapsed even more helplessly than I am now.’

It was a truth that could not be denied.

Because I was infinitely weaker back then than I am now.

Like a ship drifting on a calm sea, it would not have had the strength to withstand a sudden storm.

‘But that…’ It’s still the same now.’

It was a ship that always moved along the gentle waves in his shadow. she is.

It’s easy to break and it’s no wonder it collapses right away.

She stared blankly into space for a moment.

Then, after a while, a murmur came out of my open mouth.

“… If I leave it like this, nothing will happen.”

Strong waves crash.

The wind is strong enough to break the sail.

Rheasian wanted to overcome that difficult situation.

‘To do that, first… ‘You’ll need that.’

It was brought from Kamiel’s village.

Maybe it could be a clue to finding him, or even a clue to restoring his vitality… .

“Wait a moment… I’ll go find it soon.”

A bitter chill encroaches on the room.

The frozen white intestines.

It seemed like he couldn’t even get his feet wet from the nightmare that was about to hit the world.

* * *

At some point winter came to the world.

It was a natural part of the four seasons, but this winter was a little different.

Autumn left too early.

A cold that cannot be described as just cold sweeps through.

There was no sign of spring coming.

The cold and hungry people waited for this winter to end.

But do people even know?

This is just the beginning… .

* * *

Whiiing-

The strong wind carries the smell of iron.

Kamiel wrapped his clothes tightly against the cold that quickly made his skin turn red.

A world that has turned white.

The entire sky was covered with snow, and scattered among it were corpses buried in the snow.

Even at the moment of death, their frozen skin was clearly visible, as if they had not been able to overcome the cold.

Kamiel was looking at them.

The emotions in his eyes were strange and complex.

The look in his eyes was enough to reveal his feelings of regret, sorrow, sadness, and guilt.

‘miss… … .’

He seemed to know who brought this winter.

That’s because after falling into an unknown place, winter came unexpectedly.

And it may sound a little unexpected, but this winter kept reminding me of someone.

‘How long has it been since I’ve been wandering around like this… … .’

My body was still weak, but not to the point where I couldn’t move like before.

‘Ulkaya… .’

I once again place my hand near my heart.

Excited, Excited… The clear beating of my heart makes me reflect on the grace of a friend.

I’ve been thinking about it all along.

What did Ulka do to extend his life even a little?

‘I think I understand.’

The conclusion came sooner than expected.

However, there is no way to implement that conclusion, so all they do is wander around like a wanderer.

but… As if that was over now.

“… … .”

From the other side, I saw someone approaching with a vague shape.

Soon the snowstorm cleared and I could see the person straight in the eye.

“Finally… I found it.”

A voice full of emotion.

The voice was familiar, but it contained a deep madness that had never been seen before.

The light brown haired girl approached her lover little by little with an expression full of joy.

yet.

“Ah… Kamiel!”

She spoke happily and hugged him.

Kamiel hesitated with an expression of uncertainty, but eventually stretched out his arms and hugged her.

The winter that seemed like it would never end was coming to an end.

* * *

Leasian was in a very excited state.

Is it because I found the lover I so desperately wanted?

‘It’s been a really long time.’

A lot happened.

The first was the winter that even she could not control.

Because of this, the world died as if it was coming to an end, and the elders of the Larun tribe, who could not bear to see this, came to visit.

But they were no match for the woman who even killed Hekan.

Instead of… .

‘It was sacrificed as good fuel.’

She thought as she gazed at the softly shining crystal.

This was an item brought from Kamiel’s village.

When Rheasian first learned of the story behind this crystal, he immediately tried to destroy it.

But when I thought about it, I thought that maybe I might need it in the future.

In this way, he was brought to his residence.

‘If you didn’t bring it… It would have been terrible.’

Leasian shook his head and turned around.

That’s just an emergency.

Now that it had passed without incident, there was no need to think about it.

“Camiel.”

“… You came.”

She pulled out a chair and sat down in front of Kamiel, who was sitting at the tea table.

‘How difficult it was to find you… Do you really know?’

He smiled brightly, filled with happiness.

Even if he doesn’t recognize your hard work, it’s okay.

Because we are together like this now.

“How does the tea taste?”

“Good.”

“Really? Thank goodness.”

She said that and smiled.

Kamiel couldn’t smile despite his bright smile… .

He was smiling, but his expression was unclear.

“Ah, try it. Huh?”

“Miss, that’s a little… ”

“What?”

Her eyes sharpened.

He asked with a bright look in his eyes.

“Are you refusing what I give you now?”

“… no. Is that possible?”

Kamiel was taken aback by the sudden appearance of the young lady, but it only lasted for a moment.

Soon he obediently opened his mouth.

“Okay. Ego… .”

Only then did Rheasian laugh again and put a cookie in Kamiel’s mouth.

Yes, she wanted something like this.

I didn’t want anything big. I just wanted this little happiness.

Sitting around the tea table, drinking tea and having cookies, it may seem like everyday life at first glance.

For Leasian, daily life could only be established if Camiel was present.

‘You won’t die.’

Leashian rested his chin comfortably as he watched him munching on the cookie he had given him.

* * *

It was one day.

Rheasian had been with him ever since he returned, but was forced to leave when he went to get what he needed.

That day too, Leasian left for a moment to pick up a book.

“Kamiel I’m here… ”

Leasian, who was busy returning to the room, opened the door and came in.

But soon her expression hardened.

“Kamiel… … ? Where did you go? Kamiel?”

I mutter absentmindedly.

Since she brought him here, Kamiel has never left this room without permission.

Of course, there were threats to her not to go out.

Still, the door wasn’t blocked or anything like that.

Because I trust him.

No, because I ‘trusted’ him.

“Kamiel? Where are you? Where did you go?”

I mutter incessantly.

“Where on earth has Camiel gone…? … .”

That can’t be possible. She thought it was not her guess and denied it for now.

“Why don’t you come here? Is something happening?”

okay. Something must have happened… .

“No way… … .”

But the speculations never end, one after another.

Eventually, the worst result was reached.

You haven’t abandoned me, right?

Although he muttered that it could not be possible, Leasian could not take it lightly.

“No, that can’t be… … .”

“There’s no way Camiel would leave me!”

A shrill sound echoes like a scream.

She immediately sat down and muttered anxiously.

“Ah, Camiel… please… … .”

An intangible energy swayed around her in confusion.

It started to swirl.

Rattling, rattling, rattling, rattling…

Objects in the room that show signs.

As if to represent her feelings, it floats dizzyingly into the air… .

“Camiel!!!!”

Clink-

A frenzy broke out, starting with a decorative plate that was spinning precariously breaking.

bang! Clink—bang!

Things spinning and breaking like crazy.

Although Rheasian was sitting at the center like the core of a typhoon, it was too much to hope that he would be okay.

Netting――

A shard of glass flew out with a sharp sound and grazed my delicate arm.

A trickle of blood flowed from the spot.

‘why? … no. Kamiel couldn’t have done that, no. Could it be that I got tired of it and left? Ah – it’s worth it. ‘Because I’ve done nothing but terrible things to you.’

In her panic, she didn’t even care about her own injuries.

In fact, the eerie feeling of being hurt heightened Rheasian’s self-blame.

“I, I… … .”

It was then.

Suddenly, the door opens and the person who comes in shouts in a startled voice.

“Leasian!”

Kamiel couldn’t help but be surprised.

What on earth is going on?

I just wanted to go to the bathroom for a moment.

‘It was just a moment… .’

Unfortunately, there was no bathroom in this room.

Because of this, he could only go to the bathroom with the girl’s permission.

But inevitably, since the young lady was away, I had to leave without permission.

Has it been about five minutes since I left the room like that?

As I walked out of the hallway after finishing my errand, I had an unusual feeling.

So I arrived almost running.

But the work had already begun.

“Kamiel, Kamiel, Kamiel… ”

The young lady seemed not to have heard her own cries and just mumbled like a person in a daze.

Meanwhile, numerous fragments left scratches on her body.

‘I can’t help it.’

Kamiel looked at the center of the storm with slightly nervous eyes.

I take one step at a time, holding on to my trembling heart.

puck!

“Ugh… .”

Something flying hit my head.

Although it was only for a moment, I felt dizzy, as if my vision was blinking.

But in the end, I took a step forward again.

“Leasian! Miss Leasian!”

Although he was hit here and there by a barrage of objects with terrifying force, he stood firm.

Did his earnestness reach me?

“Ka… Miel?”

Leasian slowly turned his head at the sound of his voice, which he heard in his ear.

When I saw his face, the whirlwind that was reminiscent of chaos suddenly stopped.

Objects that were in the air fall down.

Kamiel answered with a smile.

“Yes. It’s me.”

In just a moment, things got out of hand.

Wounds here and there and clothes torn here and there.

Leasian knew that the reason he had turned into such a mess was because of himself.

“Am I like this? Kamiel, I’m really sorry… ”

She must have been quite embarrassed and apologized, even using an honorific that she didn’t usually use.

Kamiel shook his head and said.

“No. I’m fine, so don’t cry… .”

Kamiel hugged her dearly with her throbbing body.

Soon I felt her sobbing in my arms.

I also felt like my chest was getting wet.

He seemed to vaguely know what she was feeling right now, so he just gently stroked her hair.

“Huh, huh… … .”

‘How did it happen…? Has it gotten to this point?’

Camiel quietly closed his eyes due to mixed emotions.

* * *

Time passed really quickly.

However, the appearance of the two men and women remained the same as if time had passed away.

“Camiel.”

“Lady… .”

“You said Leasian, not young lady.”

“… yes. Leasian.”

When she woke up and saw her greeting her with a gentle expression, Kamiel also tried to smile.

Now it was natural for us to sleep together.

After something big happened, Leasian and Kamiel were always together.

We wake up in the morning, have a meal, drink tea, and talk.

Even though the same story was repeated every day, Leasian smiled happily.

And again… Night has come.

“It’s time to sleep now, Kamiel.”

He whispers lovingly, wrapping his arms around his neck.

Kamiel, who had been sitting there for a long time gathering his thoughts, finally stood up.

“Huh? why? Don’t you want to lie down yet?”

Leasian asked after seeing him sitting on the bed.

Kamiel smiled and nodded.

“Yes. Can we sit down and talk for a moment?”

” Remove the letter ‘yo’ at the end. I told you so many times. Now, please speak comfortably. There’s no need to be polite and worry about what others think like before, right?”

“… .Sure.”

“Wet.”

“Hmm… I understand.”

Seeing her with a stern look on her face, Kamiel smiled and answered.

“So what do you want to talk about?”

“All I can say is conversation… ”

“Lie. The only time you do that is when you have something to say.”

“… You even figured it out.”

“If you pretend, you pretend.”

Leasian smiled brightly and boasted.

Kamiel looked at that figure with softened eyes. There was also a bit of faint light mixed in.

‘I know. ‘Why didn’t I think of that?’

Just as Kamiel knows a person named Leasian well.

He had forgotten that she also probably knew a person named Camiel well.

“So, what do you really want to talk about?”

“… Miss, you look very thin.”

“Huh? Ahaha… I don’t have much of an appetite these days.”

Despite Leasian’s question, Kamiel spoke while touching her face rather than answering the question.

Then she blushed and lowered her eyes as if to avoid his gaze.

‘really… my heart aches.’

Kamiel had sad eyes.

“Leasian.”

“Huh?”

“How about we stop now?”

“… What… What are you talking about?”

He asked as if he didn’t know.

Kamiel was confident that Rheasian also knew what he meant.

“You know. The reason I am still alive even though I am past the time of death. And the reason you are getting thinner day by day.”

“… … .”

“I don’t even feel sick these days. The wound from last time healed in an instant.”

“… Then isn’t that a good thing?”

Kamiel spoke in a tone as if he really didn’t know.

“It’s not just that. Physiological phenomena such as defecation and urination no longer occur. I don’t sweat and I don’t get hungry. It’s just obligatory eating and drinking. What do I mean? You really don’t know?”

“… … .”

Leasian held his head.

Then he speaks in a low voice as if muttering.

“To me… Why on earth are you doing this to me? .”

It looked very dangerous, as if it would fall at any moment and fall into despair.

So even more so… All we can do is to stop.

“Leasian. Look straight at me.”

“… … .”

Kamiel turned her face towards me with both hands.

surely… He was thinner and more emaciated than when he was devastated before.

Her pale skin was dull and her eyes were shining, but they were fluttering as if they would go out at any moment.

Kamiel stared at her pitifully and opened his mouth.

“Leasian.”

“… Huh?”

“Do you love me?”

“Of course.”

In response to the answer without the slightest hesitation, Kamiel frowned and rolled his eyes.

“Me too.”

“… !”

“I love you too. So I can’t stand to see you having a hard time anymore. Even more so if it’s because of me.”

At Kamiel’s words, Leasian’s eyes trembled as if a secret had been revealed, but he immediately lowered his head and pretended not to know.

“What does that mean… ”

“I’m not sure, but is this a similar barrier to the one in our village?”

“… … .”

“I know this much. No, I can feel it better because I was the one who injected power into the crystal.”

Where we are now is inside a barrier.

Leasian did not move after hearing his words.

This was like a silent affirmation.

“It was strange. I’m sure my life would have ended a long time ago, but since I came here, I don’t feel sick anymore. Not only the minor illness, but even the feeling that I was going to die disappeared.”

“… … .”

Leasian still couldn’t raise his head like a criminal.

“Do you know what evidence is that a person is alive?”

That’s what you eat and expel.

Life naturally needs food to recharge its energy, and the remaining waste is expelled to the outside.

“Okay. The Larun people might be a little different. But unlike you back then, I am extremely healthy. that is… Isn’t it strange?”

And on the contrary, Rheasian becomes sick.

As if something is being offered in return.

“I was just wondering. So you need to answer more accurately. Without any lies.”

“… … .”

“Leasian. Look at me.”

Forcibly lift your head, which keeps falling, and make eye contact.

I asked looking into her trembling gaze.

“The reason you are getting thinner… Is this what I expected?”

“… … Why, why am I curious about that… .”

Moisture wells up in Leasia’s eyes.

“You can just live like this.”

“If we just live like this without wondering about anything, we can be happy.”

“Am I getting thinner? no. That’s not important.”

“Even if it’s a little difficult, I’m happy as long as I have you.”

“Leasian… Do you know that those words are similar to what I said to you before?”

“… What?”

“It was enough for me as long as you were happy. Because that is my happiness. but… You didn’t understand that.”

“I know, so even now… ”

“Me too.”

Kamiel mercilessly interrupted her and continued speaking in a clear tone.

“I think I finally understand you now. This is how we can’t be happy together. If you are having a hard time at all, the more I see you like this… Because I’m having a hard time.”

She blinked several times as if she was going to reply to his words.

“That… ”

You have to make excuses. No, you have to convince them.

May this happiness last forever as long as life lasts.

I thought so, but… .

“… okay. You are right.”

She was not shameless enough to lie even after hearing his true confession.

In the end, I revealed the secret.

“Sujeong in your village. I tweaked it a little bit. So, just like you put your life force into it, I put my life force into it and created a special barrier.”

“If you die here, you won’t die.’

“Time doesn’t pass.”

“I don’t know how much life I have left… ”

“Still, we can be happy. For a long time.”

After hearing her confession, Kamiel was silent for a while.

Rheasian thought he was organizing his thoughts.

Now that I have told you the truth, it will take time for you to understand what I mean.

but… .

Kamiel spoke firmly again.

“Leasian. My will remains unchanged.”

“… why? why? Do you hate being with me like this? Are you sick of it? I don’t even want to look at someone like me… !”

“No. i still love you But living like this is not living. And we already… You’ve done too much, right?”

“… … .”

Leasian thought about what ‘act’ he was talking about.

But there were so many things I had done that I couldn’t figure it out.

“In the end, this is just a mirage. Think carefully. If we exist as a force, if that is what maintains our happiness… What does that mean? I am already dead. Leasian.”

“No. You’re not dead yet… ”

“On the day this barrier is broken, I will eventually accept my predestined death.”

“… that’s right. When that time comes, we will die together. So,”

“Leasian. Is it still winter outside?”

“… Why is that suddenly?”

“How can I stop that?”

“That’s… I don’t know either.”

Kamiel said, looking directly at her as she shook her head as if she had no shame.

“You can do it.”

“… I’m sorry, but no matter how hard I tried to stop, it was impossible. It’s already out of my hands.”

“No. You can do it. you… Because he is the person I love. I only love people with warm hearts.”

Kamiel says that with a nonchalant smile.

Leasian just listened blankly.

“No. Even if that were possible, if I did something like that, I would no longer have the strength to maintain the barrier… ”

“It’s okay. We’re going together then, right?”

Leasian was shaking his head violently inwardly.

The more I talked to him, the more I became persuaded by his words.

however… She eventually muttered in despair.

“… I guess I love you a lot.”

“I know.”

“Okay… . got it. But you know what? In lovers’ fights, the one who fights more loses.”

“So… I guess I have no choice but to fall for your words.”

“Leasian… .”

“That’s your wish, right?”

know. Your warm-hearted lover cherishes others.

Even the family members who abandoned them are cherished… .

“… Let me ask you one last question. Kamiel.”

Leasian asks with a determined look, as if he will definitely get an answer this time.

“Is there something you value most in the world?”

“… Uh.”

“Who is that?”

This question felt quite different.

That’s why Camiel seemed to feel it too.

This might be the last question.

“… Sometimes.”

“A person who acts however he wants, is arbitrary, and speaks informally to anyone.”

“… … .”

Hearing his words, Leasian’s heart became heavy again.

The feeling of clearing one’s past karma.

However, in the following words,

“But… .”

“The only person in the world who loves me the most and prioritizes me above all else, the only person and my only love.”

“That’s… it’s you. Leasian.”

Her heavy heart became as light as cotton.

Rheasian says with a smile.

“What is that… .”

It was a cringe-worthy and offensive statement.

It made me wonder if he could even say something like this.

But what… Thanks to this, my heart felt lighter.

“Is it time to say goodbye?”

“No. It’s time to leave together.”

Rheasian responded to Kamiel’s words by holding his hand.

“Please stay like this. Because you can try without having to leave the barrier.”

“Don’t feel too pressured. What if it doesn’t work out… Because it’s something that can’t be helped.”

“Wow.”

Likewise, she laughed heartily and then let out the words like a sigh.

“Really… I’m so sad it ended like this.”

This time, Kamiel responded casually to her complaint.

“There is no need to feel sorry. If we go like this, we will be together even if we die.”

“I see… ? Huh, okay. Thanks to you, I feel some comfort.”

As she calmed down and took a deep breath, energy rose around her.

It was a movement similar to the last whirlwind, but this time the sound of wind blowing could be heard from afar, perhaps because it was larger.

Damn it-

“I… I was so happy to meet you.”

Kamiel spoke as if trying to drown out the sound of the barrier breaking.

Leasian said, holding his hand tighter as if responding to the warmth he felt in her hand.

“Who says what to say… If it wasn’t for you, I would have slit my wrists and died a long time ago.”

So damn bad――

“I was able to meet you and survive, so we saved each other’s lives, right?”

“Right?”

Blah blah blah blah!

“Be together even in death… It’s romantic.”

“… … Me too.”

As if the world were exploding, a white flash echoed from far away.

Eventually, we arrived at the place where the two people were.

Feeling their eyes turning white, they spoke without any hesitation about who would go first.

“”I love you.””

The winter that seemed like it would never end is fading away.

It was finally a brilliant spring.