episode_0064

064 – Prepare the Worst Gift! # 3

Prince Zagreus’s mansion was on the plains near Happy World.

It was a mansion built in the style of a Greek temple on a hill where asphodel flowers bloomed fully.

“I thought it would be grand, but it’s cozier than I expected.”

I was standing at the garden entrance, tidying my collar.

Someone spoke to me.

“Joy, to meet you in such a place is a truly astonishing coincidence.”

“Melinoye nim? How did you get to the party venue?”

“By walking.”

When I asked how she came, I didn’t mean by what means of transportation.

I meant why she was here.

Melinoye nim’s eyes scanned my surroundings.

“Joy, your partner isn’t visible.”

“They’re probably parking the car.”

Should I say “parking”?

It’s Kerberos.

Dog-stop?

Of course, that wasn’t important right now.

“Why did you come to the party venue? Did Melinoye nim also receive an invitation?”

“I didn’t come because I was invited to the party; I was just taking a walk nearby by chance. Remember that a perfect goddess like me loves to take walks.”

It wasn’t a coincidence.

She definitely came on purpose.

Why would she have come?

It was while I was speculating in various ways.

“Joy, don’t you have anything to say to me, who you encountered by chance, like fate, in front of the party venue?”

“The red dress suits you well. Your shoes are pointy too.”

Melinoye nim shone brightly.

She felt like a veteran player who had even used cash items.

[Goddess of Ghosts – Melinoye]

[Perfect and Beautiful Goddess]

She even bought special effects.

Didn’t the Chairman nim give her that?

The image of Melinoye nim saying to the Chairman nim, “Dad, put ‘Perfect and Beautiful Goddess’ as my title,” flashed through my mind and quickly disappeared.

Anyway.

‘Anyone can see that’s not walking attire.’

Who walks around dressed like that?

Just then, someone could be seen approaching from afar.

“Look, my partner is coming.”

“I don’t really care. They’re clearly not as pretty as me.”

Melinoye nim snorted, “Hmph,” but her eyes moved busily.

And the next moment, as expected, the two women made direct eye contact.

“Oh? Melly. What brings you here?”

“Mom?”

*Flare*-.

Melinoye nim’s gaze flickered unsteadily like a waterlogged bonfire.

“Why is Mom here?”

“I came to participate in the party. What about you? Did you also come to participate in the party? What?! Where’s your partner! Where?!”

“I’m just… taking a walk…”

Melinoye nim, always so poised and dignified, seemed flustered for some reason.

It felt like a crack appearing in the facade of the perfect and beautiful goddess.

Melinoye nim, as if squeezing out her words, said something to me while looking at me.

“Joy, surely your partner isn’t…?”

“Yes. I thought it was a bit strange that Mother didn’t receive an invitation to her son and his wife’s party, so I personally extended the invitation.”

No matter how much Melinoye nim might want to, she couldn’t say “You chose another woman instead of me? Turn into a cockroach, poof!” in front of her mother.

In other words, Persephone nim, the Goddess of Kimchi-making, is the only woman in this Soul Society who can defeat Melinoye nim.

How’s my strategy?

I can do it when I put my mind to it.

“…Hmph, well, I knew that. I am a perfect and beautiful goddess, after all. Joy, I had already anticipated everything you were thinking.”

As she said that, Melinoye nim’s hands were fidgeting a lot.

The next moment, Persephone nim, the Goddess of Kimchi-making, burst out laughing.

“Pffft! A perfect and beautiful goddess? Melly, who would have thought the day would come when you’d say such things. It feels like just yesterday you were bawling when Mom went to her maiden home.”

“…I never did that.”

“You even wet the bed because you were scared of ghosts, didn’t you? A Goddess of Ghosts afraid of ghosts…”

“…More importantly! I’m getting tired of walking. I’m going home now.”

*Swoosh-swoosh-swoosh*-.

Melinoye nim floated gently into the air, like a dandelion seed.

And her mother shouted at Melinoye nim.

“Hey! If you fly around in such a short dress, everyone below can see! Come down quickly!”

“……”

*Swoosh-swoosh*-.

Melinoye nim came back down to the ground.

Melinoye nim disappeared towards the darkness with very fast steps, and the goddess’s mother let out a sigh.

“Oh dear, she’s only grown in size; inside, she’s still a child. I don’t know how she’ll ever get married. Section Chief Joy, you’re working at the headquarters these days, right? Have you heard any rumors?”

“Rumors?”

“Rumors about Melinoye dating someone. Melinoye, even as she gets older, doesn’t seem interested in that sort of thing at all, and it’s just a worry.”

Whatever I answered, it felt like it would be the wrong answer, so I just kept my mouth shut.

Fortunately, the Goddess of Kimchi-making was a strong-willed person.

“Then let’s go inside!”

She entered confidently without waiting for me to say anything.

She had an extremely “my pace” attitude.

It was no wonder Melinoye nim was flustered.

And I also thought that Melinoye nim resembled her mother a lot.

# # #

The goddess with pink hair tied into two pigtails was called Luna Nixdoti.

The reason her name format was different from the Greek gods was that she had lived a long time on Earth like a normal human.

Then she met Prince Zagreus, who had come up to Earth.

They fell in love by fate and, after all sorts of hardships and tribulations, ended up getting married.

“And so, they lived happily ever after.”

A video about their meeting was playing on a screen installed in the house.

The title was “Illegal Immigrant Prince from Another World.”

I wasn’t particularly interested.

“Oh, so many guests! Swarming like hell roaches!”

Nixdoti nim looked at the guests, greatly pleased.

However, the beautiful brows of the goddess furrowed into an “eight-shape” in an instant.

“Ugh, Mother-in-law!”

“Child, you should call me ‘Mother,’ not ‘Mother-in-law’!”

Persephone nim approached Nixdoti nim, who was greeting guests in the lobby, and scolded her.

Then the pink-haired goddess became extremely flustered.

“…But ‘Mother-in-law’ seems more friendly… Saying ‘Mother-in-law’ feels like putting on airs and building a wall…”

“Anyway, she’s still saying strange things!”

“So, why did Mother-in-law come here!”

“I was invited too. Here’s the invitation. Ta-da!”

“Oh, shit…! Why is this in Mother-in-law’s hand…!?”

“…Shit? Child, you should use cultured words!”

…Was this the conversation of the highest-ranking goddesses who ruled Soul Society?

It was a high-level story, enough to make my mind dizzy.

Ordinary mortals would have their brain blood vessels burst just from listening to the conversation.

I barely managed to endure it because I was a section chief-level employee at headquarters.

“Section Chief Joy! You actually called my Mother-in-law with the invitation I gave you! You got me good!”

Nixdoti nim growled at me like an angry raccoon.

‘Did I lose favor?’

Now Nixdoti nim would probably chatter to her husband, Prince Zagreus, “Section Chief Joy is a total bad guy!”

Then my path to promotion is definitely blocked!

‘…I won.’

It was a long journey.

How much effort and sacrifice it took to get here.

It felt good that my blood, sweat, and tears were not in vain.

I wasn’t wrong.

Now I just needed to drive in the final wedge.

So I held out the box I was holding to Nixdoti nim.

“This is a gift.”

“A gift!”

It seemed that exclamation marks were attached to every word of Prince Zagreus’s first wife.

It was while I was looking around with personal interest, wondering where the second and third wives were.

*Click*-.

The box opened, and a pitch-black spider appeared from inside.

A spider as big as a palm, covered in fluffy fur.

*Woof-woof…!*

“Th-this is…!?”

Nixdoti nim’s face turned pale.

A spider.

While some people like them, most would agree that they are generally terrifying-looking animals.

So, how much would I be hated for bringing such a spider as a gift?

“There are many hell roaches in Soul Society, aren’t there? If you raise one spider, it will easily drive away mosquitoes and roaches in your house. How about letting it loose in the garden and raising it…?”

I feigned nonchalance.

But the next moment, something completely unexpected happened.

*Drip-drip-drip*-.

The Crown Princess goddess began to shed tears from her emerald eyes.

Was my gift so terrible that it made her cry?

‘Wait, it’s not good if I lose too much favor.’

If I lost more than a certain amount of favor points, it might not be Joy’s dismissal, but Joy’s disintegration.

With such thoughts, I became unnecessarily nervous, but the goddess embraced the spider and rubbed her face all over it.

“Woofy! You’re back!”

*Hioong…!*

…Woofy?

That was also a reaction I hadn’t expected.

“Ah-! That one is Woofy…! It’s Goddess Nixdoti nim’s pet spider that she lived with since she lived on Earth as a human…!”

What…!?

“It’s been a year since Nixdoti nim left the window open for a moment, and it ran away from home and there was no news at all…! Section Chief Joy has found and brought back that Woofy…!”

“Section Chief Joy is giving the Zagreus couple a great gift.”

“How on earth did he find it?”

“Indeed, the Audit Team’s Devil. His abilities are amazing!”

My vision went dark.

I should have just lived as “Black Bundle.”

Even more surprising was what happened next.

“Ah, Woofy! No!”

Nixdoti nim was startled.

The spider, Woofy, jumped and clung to Persephone nim’s shoulder.

*Woof-woof…!*

“…Hee hee hee! Oh no! Woofy! Not there! Mother-in-law is a scary person! She might pickle you into kimchi fermented seafood!”

Nixdoti nim was tense.

I also started to feel unnecessarily tense.

However, Persephone nim gently stroked the spider sitting on her shoulder with her finger.

“Pffft, what a cute and robust spider. I used to raise a spider like this too. My mother from my maiden home didn’t like it, so I hid it in a jar and secretly raised it.”

“Oh, shit…! Mother-in-law also raised a spider…!?”

“Yes. Its name was Mioong-y. Because it cries ‘Mioong-oong’ when it’s happy!”

“Naming it Mioong-y because it cries ‘Mioong-oong’! That’s a completely careless name!”

“Who are you to talk, you who named your pet Woofy because it barks ‘Woof-woof’?”

The two goddesses had a harmonious conversation about spiders, like flowers blooming.

It was as if their bickering just moments ago had been a lie.

“Everyone, look at this…! The gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, deeper and darker than Happy World, is sticking together like N and S poles…! Section Chief Joy, to have aimed for all of this is truly fitting for an ‘Honorary Nymph’…!”

“This Carnoy doesn’t know what’s what, but it seems like something good has happened…! Let’s dance the Nymph dance of joy…!”

*Doom-chit-doom-chit*-.

*Doom-chit-doom-chit*-.

…Honestly, I don’t even know what’s going on anymore.

# # #

The bustling party ended, and it was late at night.

Goddess Nixdoti carefully placed the spider, Woofy, who had returned home, into a small jar.

“Woofy, don’t run away like that when I’m not around from now on!”

Goddess Nixdoti’s divinity was not yet perfect, so she was a goddess with many naive and innocent aspects.

To Nixdoti, Woofy, the pet spider she had raised since ancient times, was family itself.

Having lost and then found her family member, Woofy, there was no happier day than today.

“Hassan, I told Mother-in-law the front door password; that’s okay, right? She said she’d come to my house and take care of Woofy when I’m not here!”

The man called Hassan.

Zagreus frowned.

“Why? You said my mom made you uncomfortable?”

“It’s okay now! We talked a lot today and became close! But I also got scolded. She said not to call Hassan ‘Hassan.’ Zagreus. It’s just a name that doesn’t stick to my tongue!”

“Well, when I ran away from here and lived on Earth, I met you under the name Hassan.”

Memories flashed in their eyes.

That was brief, and then Nixdoti chattered about what was interesting today.

“Section Chief Joy, he was amazing! He found Woofy! He even recognized the true worth of my voodoo! And most of all, he’s a *beep*. It must have been really hard for a *beep* to reach that position.”

“What? I couldn’t hear you because of the beep.”

“Oh, shit…! It seems it was censored! Then what I just said is canceled! Voodoo of cancellation, ptooey-ptooey! That should do it, right? It’s annoying if I get on the bad side of the unnies!”

Goddess Nixdoti was an amazing goddess who could even take back words she had already spoken.