episode_0023

023 – If You Can’t Enjoy It, Go Mad #2

“Happy World” is quite vast. Because all sorts of souls reside there, there were many diverse places and facilities. As for Nyx Street, the downtown area, it was so bustling that it was noisy.

“Surface world goods for sale! Freshly brought from the surface by our ‘Hermes Trading Company’!” “Come, come, those who wish to contact their ties on the surface world! We offer the chance for 100 gold coins!” “Selling ‘Nymptendo2 Switch’! Hurry and buy before the great CEO raises tariffs on surface world items!”

The “Hermes Trading Company,” which mainly dealt in surface world goods, was also located on Nyx Street.

“Branch Manager, are you in?” “Oh, Mr. Joy! It’s been a long time. These days, I’ve been hearing a lot about you in ‘Happy World’.”

Kelton, the branch manager of Happy World, clacked his teeth together and rubbed his bony palms. He looked like a skeleton grunt from a game, but he was rumored to be a remarkably resourceful businessman even in this barren underworld.

“Is Bones doing well?” “Director Bones is doing too well. That’s the problem.” “Hahaha! Is that so! Wow, that takes me back! Bones and Kelton. We, the people who started at the same time, were called the golden generation. I somehow got pushed out of the path to promotion, so I ended up starting my own business!” “Ahem, Mr. Kelton, can I also use this communication service that allows contact with the surface world? There’s someone I want to send a message to. My mother.”

It seemed like a newly added product. My heart pounded with a long-awaited sense of anticipation.

“Of course, you can. But Mr. Joy, you know it’s a one-way street, right? It’s just projecting your image briefly into your mother’s dream, but—” “What about the fee?”

Tap-tap. Branch Manager Kelton tapped a sign with his bony hand.

「Contacting the Surface World: 100 Gold per 5 seconds」 「Purchase Sound Quality and Image Quality Upgrade Product for an additional 20 Gold!」 「Premium product subscribers can send without ads!」 「★Director-level and below cannot use the lottery number prediction service!★」

100 gold was an amount easily equivalent to several years of my annual salary. Unfortunately, I had used most of my money buying hell cacti and flower beds, so I couldn’t help but click my tongue in regret.

Mr. Kelton rubbed his palms and subtly made a suggestion.

“The fact that contact with the surface world is now possible is all thanks to Sisyphus Energy, as the power supply is overflowing enough to hit its maximum output. I heard that’s all thanks to Mr. Joy. Is that right?” “It was by chance.” “Haha, how modest of you! In light of asking for your continued cooperation in various ways, I was thinking of offering you a service, would that be alright? While a call is difficult, it’s possible to look at their appearance.” “Oh, that’s good.”

So I found myself standing by a strange well. It was a treasure called the “Well of Darkness.”

“If you look into that jet-black water, it will project the image of the person you wish to see, Mr. Joy. You have to wish well in your heart.” How fascinating. It was when I was looking down into the well, thinking of my mother’s image.

─Professor, not only did you pay for all my medical expenses, but you even secured a job for me. I’m truly so grateful. Fortunately, I’m confident in housework. ─Hahaha! Lee Seo was like a son to me, so wouldn’t his mother also be like family to me? Since Lee Seo got a job overseas and there’s no news from him, I should at least take care of his mother.

It’s Mom and the Professor! From the looks of it, Mom seemed to have gotten a job as a housekeeper at the Professor’s house. I, a graduate student, used to do all sorts of odd jobs, and now it seems that’s Mom’s turn. Still, from what I heard, it seemed the Professor paid for all of my mother’s treatment and took care of her until she fully recovered. I’m glad she seems to be doing well.

─Mother, then how about a movie after work later? ─Oh, Professor, you have a wife, hohoho!

Wait, what is this? Why is the Professor hitting on my mom?

Blurry— Perhaps because my mind was disturbed, the images of the two people being drawn in the well disappeared.

“Aaaargh! Show me their images again, quickly! Quickly!”

Slowly spreading— Perhaps my earnest wish reached it, and the well showed someone’s image again.

─He’s probably just having a business conversation with a female employee… ─But, what if he has ill intentions towards another woman…?

It was the image of Lady Melinoye, meditating in a chair. Why is it suddenly showing Melinoye’s image?

─Who’s there? Who dares to disturb my meditation?

At that moment, it was Princess Melinoye, her eyes flashing open as she looked at me. When I was startled, Mr. Kelton hastily covered the well with a lid.

“Oh dear! Mr. Joy, it’s dangerous to carelessly peek at executives! You know Actaeon, right? The fellow who became a deer after peeking at a goddess bathing! You’re just asking for that kind of trouble!” “No, I wasn’t really trying to see on purpose.” “Ah, then it seems like there was a cross-connection! I thought such a thing wouldn’t happen after the power supply became stable. Oh dear, I apologize.”

Ultimately, my peeking ended like that.

‘At this rate, the Professor is going to become my stepfather!’

I have more reason to escape this “Happy World” and go to the surface world as soon as possible. To do that, it’s important to be disliked by that horned devil.

“Have you been waiting long?”

Astaroth from the audit team crossed her arms and gave a warning as I came out of the trading company.

“Coming out to the market during work hours and for personal errands too? What’s more, to do such a thing with me, an audit team employee, standing right next to you. What a gutsy man.” “You’re checking the demerit points well, right?” “Of course.” Good, good. It’s going smoothly.

“But Ms. Astaroth, why do you go around alone? As far as I know, audit team employees usually go around in groups of three. Like the Furies.”

I suddenly wondered and asked while walking around the market. At my words, Astaroth snorted.

“That’s because I’m more comfortable alone.”

# # #

‘To think he just idles around during work hours. Section Chief Joy, I didn’t know you were such a negligent person. Was the rumor about you being called the “Demon of Happy World” an exaggeration?’

Astaroth greatly reduced her internal evaluation score for Section Chief Joy. It would be fair to say she was disappointed. She thought he would be a cold and solitary being like herself, to be called a “Demon.” Looking at him like this, he just seemed like an ordinary person.

Just then, Section Chief Joy, who had been exploring the market as if on a food tour, stopped in front of a certain shop.

“‘Heaven Company Happy World Branch’…? I didn’t know such a store would open.” “Oh?”

Astaroth was greatly surprised. “Heaven Company.” That was the head office where she had been employed before being dispatched. In other words, it was like her old stomping grounds.

“When did this open? When on earth?!” “Let’s go in once.”

Sliding— Section Chief Joy extended his foot towards the automatic door. Astaroth, out of pleasant surprise, was about to step inside, then flinched and stopped, greatly surprised. She barely managed to regain her dazed senses from the unexpected scent of home encountered in a foreign land.

“I’m not going in. Because I’m on duty.” “Is that so? There seem to be many interesting products. What on earth is this Fruit of Good and Evil Tanghulu? What happens if I eat this?” “…What? Fruit of Good and Evil—Ahem. I’m not interested. Because I’m on duty.”

Fruit of Good and Evil Tanghulu. Just imagining that sweet and sour forbidden taste made saliva drool from the corners of her mouth. Truly diabolical! So Astaroth decided that she must definitely stop by the store after work.

However, there was a problem. 「Business Hours: 9:00~18:00」

Astaroth’s work hours were always from 9 AM to 7 PM. The store would close before Astaroth could leave work.

Having confirmed this fact, Astaroth asked a clerk who was cleaning the store entrance.

“Sundays? Do you open on Sundays too?” “Young lady, it seems you don’t know, but our Heaven Company employees rest on Sundays, as it’s the Sabbath. We also have to strictly adhere to closing times. Wow, it’s really nice that ‘time’ has been introduced here too.”

Originally, there was no concept of time in “Happy World,” but through Section Chief Joy’s brilliant achievements, the concept of time was introduced in various places. The Heaven Company store closing at 6 PM was also for that reason.

‘What! Then this is a store I can never go to! Section Chief Joy, could it be that he collaborated with Kronos to introduce time just to torment me like this…?!’ No. ‘Even asking me to make time today, was it because he predicted this would happen?! I knew the audit team and regular employees didn’t get along, but do they usually torment someone this much…?!’

Astaroth couldn’t help but think that way. Furthermore, Section Chief Joy even tried to tempt her with a subtle voice.

“Ms. Astaroth, I heard you’re a dispatched employee from Heaven Company. Isn’t it hard living in a foreign place? We’re similar in that we both left our hometowns for ‘business innovation’.” “So… what?” “I’ll pretend not to know, so how about trying a bite of this tanghulu? Opportunities to eat hometown food aren’t common, you know. Let’s go into the store together.” “Hmph, I’ll just eat it after I leave work. I have plenty of time after work today!” “Is that so? As far as I know, the audit team’s closing time is 7 PM. But this store closes at 6 PM, so the timing won’t work for you.”

‘This guy—! To know even my work hours, he really is capable!’

Astaroth thought Section Chief Joy was proficient in temptation. Indeed, he was worthy of proudly displaying the nickname “Demon.”

“I won’t eat it!”

# # #

I had a very good time. I also tried the amazing tanghulu. I thought it would be grand, being called a “Fruit of Good and Evil,” but it just tasted like apple. Anyway, demerit points must have piled up a lot, right?

“…”

Astaroth’s mood had also seemed very bad for a while now. Perhaps she was angry at my overtly negligent attitude as a thorough audit team employee.

Just then.

“Oh? Team Leader.” “T-Team Leader?” “No way. She couldn’t possibly be here while it’s still work hours, not our strict Team Leader…”

As we were about to leave the market, several women abruptly stopped their steps. Astaroth seemed to have recognized them.

“Oh? You’re the friends from our team who took annual leave today. What are you doing here?” “Uh, uh, we’re… um…” “Makari’s birthday is today.” “All of our team members decided to meet here after work…” “Hey, shhh, that story…”

What’s this? This atmosphere suddenly becoming awkward. The women, who seemed to be audit team employees, also showed tense expressions.

Then someone spoke.

“…Um, it’s my birthday today, Team Leader, would you like to come too?”

A tense situation. Astaroth hastily opened her mouth.

“I’m fine. I’m busy this evening. I have an appointment, and a lot of work to handle. I’m fine, so you guys eat something delicious among yourselves. Instead, make sure to come to work on time tomorrow!” “Is that so?” “Team Leader, that’s really a shame!” “Let’s definitely eat together next time.”

They rushed away— The employees disappeared somewhere. I recalled that Astaroth had said a while ago that she had plenty of time after work. However, she probably couldn’t tell the truth.

‘The fact that an audit team employee, who should be moving in groups of three, is walking around alone. And the fact that she was the only one not invited to a party where most of her team members were invited. This fellow, perhaps…?’ Is she being ostracized or left out? She’s the only dispatched employee from outside. She also has strange horns. Perhaps it was due to her overly strict personality.

‘The fact that she’s the only different being. Somehow, it doesn’t feel like someone else’s problem.’

After seeing my mother reflected in the well, I was feeling very emotional due to a longing for home. I held out a bag full of tanghulu that I had bought to Astaroth.

“I bought too much. At this rate, I can’t eat it all. I can’t just throw it on the ground either. Ms. Astaroth, please throw it away on your way.”

The next morning after returning home. Astonishing news was written in large letters in the Happy World newspaper.

「Uncovering the worst food scandal since ‘Happy World’s’ founding!」 「Popular food ‘Fruit of Good and Evil series’ actually just apples…!?」

Cold sweat trickled down my back. I did think it subtly tasted like apple. That it was really apple…!? It was truly a shocking twist.

「Ms. Astaroth of the Headquarters Audit Team testifies she quickly recognized the deception because it was hometown food!」 「All quantities of Honey Butter Fruit of Good and Evil and Fruit of Good and Evil Tanghulu discarded!」 「All audit team employees receive bonus incentives! Great windfall!」

“Joy! That fearsome audit team employee is here again!” Markius made a fuss. When I turned my head, Astaroth approached me and poked me in the chest.

“I can’t believe you’d make me owe you like this. Section Chief Joy, truly a devilish idea, befitting the nickname ‘Demon of Happy World.’ But! I’m the kind of person who can’t live owing anyone.” “What do you mean, ‘debt’? I don’t know what you’re talking about, and I don’t want to know! Even if there really is such a thing, you don’t have to repay it!” “Look at him lying without even batting an eyelid. He truly deserves to be called a ‘Demon,’ doesn’t he? Hehehe! Good! If you ever get fired from this ‘Happy World’ someday, I’ll take responsibility and bring you to ‘Heaven Company.’ I’ll promise you at least director-level treatment. If you sign this contract!”

「Soul Lease Agreement」 「Joy (hereinafter referred to as ‘Party A’) and Astaroth (hereinafter referred to as ‘Party B’) hereby enter into the following lease agreement.」 「Contract Period: Eternity」 「Leased Item: Soul」 「During the lease period, ‘Party B’ promises ‘Party A’ the position of director at Heaven Company.」

“A-a director position…?!” Director Bones fainted.