Chapter 49: Sexual Desire Expression – 4

“Don’t… protect another woman in front of me.”

Vivian warned him.

“You’re my prisoner. As the price for losing the war, you have to serve as my knight. Don’t you dare interfere with my actions.”

“…Enough.”

Vivian scoffed, not in the mood to entertain Kailo’s words at the moment.

“Fine, I’ll stop. So let go.”

-Smack!

She shook off Kailo’s hand.

Vivian looked at Lani, who clutched her cheek in shock.

“Lani Dubois.”

At her call, Lani’s terrified eyes looked back at Vivian.

Vivian liked that.

If she imprinted fear in her once, this wouldn’t happen again.

“…I thought you came to this land to be a friend… but it seems you came to find a partner?”

Lani didn’t know how to respond.

“No… I…”

But Vivian had no intention of calming her anger.

“If you’re looking for a partner, go cling to some boy soldier somewhere else… Do you dare to cozy up with Kailo Alan?”

“Vi-Vivian…”

With a fierce anger, Vivian demanded.

“How dare you… attempt to whisper love with the son of the man who killed my father and brother?”

Lani couldn’t even respond to Vivian’s fury.

She dropped to her knees in an instant, begging over and over.

“I’m sorry…! I’m so sorry! Lady Vivian, I must have been out of my mind…! I… just for a moment…!”

-Thud.

Kailo, with a hardened expression, lifted Lani by the arm.

Vivian felt her anger flare again, but this time she kept it contained.

Kailo Alan’s eyes were sending a message.

He was truly at the edge of his patience.

He was warning her not to cross the final line.

Vivian waited for Kailo’s response.

After helping Lani to her feet, he dusted the mud off her knees.

Then, stepping toward Vivian, he leaned in and whispered.

“…We didn’t do anything.”

“…You…”

“I pushed her away.”

At Kailo’s confession, Vivian felt a piece of her immense anger melt away for a moment.

Blinking, she looked at Kailo.

He continued.

“What you’re worried about… It didn’t happen. I already learned my lesson with Serena last time. Just as you said, I’ve kept myself away from happiness. So… please, stop this now.”

Vivian glanced sideways at Kailo.

There wasn’t a hint of a lie in his eyes.

Although her anger had mostly subsided, accepting that they had continued meeting without her knowledge was still hard to swallow.

She had been holding back like a fool.

Squeezing out her remaining anger, Vivian spoke to Lani.

“Lani Dubois.”

“…Y-yes….”

“I’ll decide what to do about this tomorrow. Whether I’ll forgive it as a one-time mistake or impose a fitting punishment… I’ll decide then.”

“…Sniff… Yes…”

“…Now get out. Disappear from my sight.”

Lani fled instantly at Vivian’s words.

As she left, Kailo watched her with deep sympathy in his eyes.

“What are you looking at?”

Vivian had no intention of allowing even that.

Kailo’s dark eyes turned to her.

Their bodies were close—so close that neither of them moved away.

A drop of water from Kailo’s hair fell onto Vivian’s forehead.

In the cold weather, Kailo’s body radiated warmth like a hearth.

If she lost her mind, she might want to sink into that warmth.

As Lani disappeared, Vivian felt another wave of intense emotion surge within her.

Before she realized it, she placed her hand on Kailo’s chest.

-Slide.

“…Vivian.”

It was the spot Lani had touched earlier.

The fact that she considered him her own made her hesitate even less.

“Did you like it?”

Vivian asked mockingly.

She slowly trailed her fingertips down, feeling his firm abs.

“Did it feel good, having Lani Dubois touch you there…? Did it excite you?”

She didn’t even know why she was doing it, simply acting on impulse.

The sensation under her fingertips was addictive.

Vivian bit her lip briefly before looking up at him again.

“So much for acting strong. If you’re so shaken by something like this, you’re just a beast in the end. Just a brute.”

Vivian continued to sneer, needing to do at least this much to relieve the fire inside her.

Kailo sighed and spoke quietly.

“I told you to stop.”

“Stop what? Am I wrong? If I’d left you and Lani alone a bit longer, you’d be headed to the stables together. Almost did something filthy on my land.”

Even as she spoke, her own words infuriated her further.

The possibility of her taunts felt disturbingly real, making her realize just how terrifying the situation had been a moment ago.

In her anger, Vivian said.

“…Are you some kind of monkey? Now that you’re sixteen, you’re poking around with this girl and that.”

Kailo slowly raised his head, his gaze fixed on her, his jaw clenched.

Despite this, Vivian continued.

“Disgusting. Vile… Kailo. Please, I’m begging you… don’t do that kind of dirty thing in front of me.”

Vivian bit her lip, expressing her emotions.

“…Because it makes me want to kill everyone.”

Vivian then turned and walked away.

She felt the strength leave her body.

If she relaxed, she thought she might collapse right there.

Since she had turned away, she’d been holding back the surge of emotion threatening to spill over.

She didn’t understand why, but it felt like she was about to cry.

She couldn’t tell what was so upsetting and suffocating.

Maybe it was the unfairness of their reunion being like this after five days, or the betrayal she felt knowing Kailo had secretly continued meeting Lani, or perhaps the pain of her own harsh words to him.

-Thud!

“Gasp!”

But at that moment, something stopped her in her tracks.

***

“Disgusting. Vulgar. Kailo, please, I’m begging you… don’t do such filthy things in front of me. It makes me want to kill everyone.”

At Vivian’s words, I felt something snap within me.

What did I do that was so wrong?

How hard have I tried to push that woman, Lani, away, and yet I still have to hear this?

Did it really have to be like this with Vivian, after meeting her again for the first time in five days?

And she keeps treating me like I’m some kind of lust-driven monster, which is incredibly unfair.

I wasn’t just going to sit here and take it.

If she’s going to see me as a lust-driven monster and not even give me a chance to explain…

…then there’s no need for me to hold back any longer.

I watched her walk away.

Her thin pajamas clung to her body.

Her transformation was clearly noticeable.

As I let go, an uncontrollable, hot emotion surged up.

The feeling was even stronger because I was seeing her for the first time in a while.

And the impulse was harder to resist, having not seen her for so long.

My heart pounded as if my repressed instincts were being unleashed.

Despite myself, blood was rushing to my lower body.

My ears buzzed with a mix of anger and excitement.

I followed behind her as she left.

–Thud!

Without hesitation, I wrapped my arms around her.

I encircled her waist with my left arm and held her shoulder with my right hand.

Her body was warmer and softer in my embrace than I’d expected.

“Ah!”

I heard Vivian gasp in surprise, exhaling sharply.

But I held her tightly, making sure she couldn’t draw another breath.

I pressed her closer to me, as if crumpling her into my embrace.

My hips pressed against her backside.

The feeling of disgust she directed at me was unwarranted.

Responsibility without pleasure?

If that’s how it is, then I’ll take my pleasure for myself.

Fueled by anger toward her, I acted without reserve.

“Kill me.”

I whispered into her ear, gritting my teeth.

“If you said you’d kill me for doing something so filthy, then kill me.”

Vivian stood frozen, unable to respond.

Her stillness suited me just fine.

From the moment her soft body came into my arms, my patience had snapped.

I touched her provocatively.

I pinched her belly gently.

My right hand slowly moved toward her chest.

…I buried my face in the nape of her neck, inhaling her scent.

Then, I bit her neck softly.

I wanted to bite hard, as angry as I was.

I wanted her to feel as much pain as I felt turmoil inside.

I thought I’d feel better if she screamed and shed a few tears because of me.

But, of course, I couldn’t bring myself to go that far.

Afraid of hurting her, I held back against the urge to bite down harder.

“Ugh…!”

She started squirming in surprise.

Her resistance only fueled me further.

She tried to escape, but she couldn’t.

I felt as though I had completely dominated her.

A hint of sadism surfaced within me.

But as my emotions calmed and satisfaction crept in, I let her go.

As soon as I did, she pulled away from me, pushing me back.

I didn’t resist and let myself be pushed, dropping to the floor.

“Hah…! Hah…!”

Vivian looked back at me, her eyes wide with shock.

She clutched her bitten neck, breathing heavily.

I couldn’t detect a trace of the earlier fury in her gaze.

Instead, her expression was filled with confusion.

Even in the darkness, her face was flushed red, as red as her hair.

For some reason, that sight made me laugh.

“This is what lust looks like.”

I said, smiling.

“…Hah…! Hah…!”

“…Got it?”

Vivian turned away without answering, fleeing in a hurry.

It was amusing to see her fleeing, dropping the strong facade she usually wore.

Acting as if she’d devour and kill me, only to turn red like a rose and run away after a single hug—how could that not be funny?

It was her girlish side that I hadn’t seen in a long time.

–Ssssshhh….

I sat in the rain, unmoving.

Vivian’s ridiculous reaction amused me for only a moment.

…But as she left, my irritation and anger subsided a little, and… a shallow sense of regret began to creep in.

Did I leave an indelible scar on her?

How was I supposed to face her from now on?

I had so many worries.

“…Hah…”

I covered my face and sighed.

Lying down, I lay in the rain for a while.

***

“Hah…! Hah…!”

Even after coming back into her room, Vivian couldn’t calm herself.

She climbed onto the bed, still soaked, and pulled the covers up over her head.

Thump!

Thump!

Thump!

Her heart was pounding.

Her breathing was rapid.

Her heart raced as though it would leap out of her chest.

She couldn’t put into words the emotions she was feeling.

She was bewildered.

She was flustered.

And lurking beneath it all was an unknown emotion, shaking her even more.

Lust—something she always thought was disgusting and dirty.

Whenever Lady Linne talked about it, it only made her uncomfortable.

Yet that same disgusting lust, Kailo had directed toward her.

Kailo, her sworn enemy’s son and complete adversary, had shown it to… her.

“Hah…! Hah…!”

Vivian took a shuddering breath.

The sensations of that moment vividly filled her memory, wrapping around her body.

The hand that pinched her belly.

The two arms clumsily embracing her.

The arm that lightly brushed her chest.

His nose, breathing in her scent.

The hard object pressing against her backside.

And even the spot where he bit her neck.

“…Ugh!”

Vivian winced and rubbed her bitten neck, the spot still tender.

The subtle pain left from where Kailo had bitten her sent chills down her spine, as if reliving the moment.

This was her first sexual experience.

Being her first, it made her feel sensations she couldn’t fully understand, causing her chest to feel restless.

Vivian gripped the blanket tightly, her body trembling.

Even under the covers, she felt inexplicably cold.

Now that Kailo’s warmth was gone, the difference was painfully clear.

Scenes from earlier replayed endlessly in her mind.

The smell, the warmth, the feel, the atmosphere of that moment.

Nothing faded or blurred; it all remained vividly etched into her senses.

He had distanced himself from Serena, pushed Lani away, and yet… he had held her with unrestrained intensity and bit her neck.

–Thud!

Suddenly, Vivian clutched her chest.

Something was violently stirring inside her.

She had already thought a hundred times over that this wasn’t right.

These feelings were something her rational mind couldn’t comprehend.

Kailo, whom she had only ever despised, had shown her such disgusting lust…

…and yet, a sweet, almost melting happiness kept seeping in.