Kim Sun-ho’s Relationship Arrangement (1)

“Where’ve you been?”

“Oh? I just came back from the VR room.”

Ji-hye glares coldly.

I probably didn’t get caught banging Se-ah, but I feel a little guilty for some reason.

It’s already past dinner time, so she’s probably half worried, half annoyed that I’m just getting back now, right?

‘If she wants to do it today, I’ll be screwed.’

Tomorrow is the shoot.

Swimsuit shoot.

If things had gone as planned, I’d be rolling around in bed with Ji-hye right now.

But I just came from blowing my load.

Twice, and half sucked off both times.

Taking the pill would be a waste.

I was planning to do it today to get rid of my horniness before the shoot, but taking the pill would defeat the purpose.

“Did you forget what we were supposed to do today?”

“No, I remember, why? You wanna do it now?”

“I was thinking we should skip it today. I’m not really in the mood.”

“Huh? Really?”

Unexpected.

Ji-hye isn’t a total nympho, but I thought she’d still want to do it.

It’s not like we hate each other. But she doesn’t want to?

“Is something bothering you?”

“…No, I took that thing on the desk, thinking it was a vitamin, and it made me feel a little clearer?”

“A vita-, no, you ate that?”

“Eun-ha said it was tasty, so I ate it. It was sweet and delicious.”

‘Isn’t that the kind of pill that makes you hot and bothered?’

What the fuck is this pill?

Se-ah got all hot and bothered and rolled around like crazy, and Eun-ha says it makes her energetic.

Ji-hye just says it clears her head?

‘Does that mean Ji-hye doesn’t have any affection for me? Is it really just because our bodies are compatible?’

I’m a little shocked.

Even if it’s just sex, there’s still some kind of connection, but are you telling me we’ve just been banging without any of that?

Instead, my head is clearing up and I’m getting dazed.

Without even realizing it, I stared blankly at Ji-hye, feeling a little dazed.

“I guess it’s some kind of vitamin that clears your head, buy more later. I’ll give you the money.”

“……Okay, I’ll buy more later.”

“Then let’s go to bed early today, you know we have to go tomorrow, right? We’re taking a taxi.”

“…Okay, I got it. Then I’m a little tired, so I’ll go to my room.”

“Ah, Eun-ha went to meet her friends and she’s coming back tomorrow. If they ask, just make something up.”

“Okay.”

Click

I closed the door and lay down on the bed.

‘Affection, compatibility, bullshit, it was all my own wishful thinking.’

My head hurts.

I’m the idiot for thinking about us as siblings, or lovers outside.

If she ate it and felt even more detached, that means Ji-hye has no feelings at all.

And I didn’t even know that, and I was so confident just because we had some sex?

How pathetic must I look! How hard must it have been to watch me get so cocky just because we banged a little?

I’m pissed, but I’m not angry.

In a way, I’m the crazy one, right? If you develop feelings after just one fuck, you’re a fucking sex master.

It’s just that the aroused body dominates the emotions during sex.

“This sucks.”

I sighed and lay down, staring at the ceiling.

The anger that doesn’t go away easily quietly engulfs and envelops my body.

The anger makes my body helpless, and a useless sense of helplessness begins to dominate.

I’m just a jobless loser, and I thought I could finally have a little confidence, but no way.

“…”

Without a word, I sat down at my desk and turned on the computer.

There were only four pills left on the desk.

If you have no feelings, it clears your head, huh?

Gulp

It’s really sweeter than I thought.

It goes down smoothly, and it dissolves well without having to chew or melt it, and I can feel it going down my throat.

“Hoo-“

My head started to clear up.

The cleared head brought about a cold-hearted thought and hid the anger and helplessness.

Yeah, I was thinking too much.

I was getting too invested in a relationship where we just lend each other our bodies.

“Let’s play some games and go to bed…. Yeah…”

Hoo-

Still, I couldn’t stop the sigh that naturally came from my throat.

What the fuck is this pill that makes people so complicated…? Shit…

–

Late night came.

I couldn’t even blink and quietly stared at my phone.

“…Ah”

I didn’t answer that I would do it.

I should have looked at the model shooting conditions and given an answer?

Looking through the texts belatedly, it already came…?

[Your girlfriend confirmed and said she would do it! Then please come to the swimming pool by 10 o’clock!]

“What, girlfriend? No, Ji-hye did it?”

My head is spinning.

It doesn’t seem like she saw the text that came to me, did Ji-hye contact them separately and get an answer?

That’s possible, yeah. I don’t think this is a big problem.

‘But she should have said something to me, right? I need to ask about this.’

I immediately got up from the bed and knocked on the door.

Knock knock-

“Why at this hour?”

“Let’s talk about tomorrow’s shoot.”

“Come in then.”

Click-

I saw Ji-hye’s face looking at me while lying on the blanket.

The light from the screen showed her face a little, so I pulled out a chair from the desk and sat down.

“I definitely should have answered that about 2 days ago, but I forgot and couldn’t give it?”

“Oh, I contacted them and asked about it. And I gave the answer, that we’ll do it.”

“…Then you could have said a word to me. That you answered in advance.”

My head is clear.

This pill, is it really a vitamin and not an exciting pill?

I slowly began to fill my clear mind with memories.

“I was going to talk about it while we were going tomorrow. We’re going to do it anyway, right?”

“That’s true, but wouldn’t you be surprised if a text suddenly came saying that it was confirmed?”

“There’s no reason to be surprised about that, you have a lot of time anyway because you’re a jobless bum, can’t you just let it go?”

I feel strangely scratched inside.

As much as my mind is clear, the intensity of the scratching was strong.

It leaves marks as if scratching a blank canvas with a fingernail.

It stings. More than the words to just let it go, the word bum hurts a lot.

“Just because I’m a jobless bum with a lot of time doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have told me, right?”

“No, you’re a person with a lot of time, and I was going to tell you about it while we were going tomorrow anyway, so you came to argue about that?”

“I didn’t come to argue, I came to talk. You could have told me that much, right? What kind of relationship do you and I have?”

“Just a relationship then? Don’t tell me you’re going to act like my boyfriend now just because we had some sex?”

“…Ji-hye, watch your mouth. You haven’t been like that since the department store.”

She pours salt on the wound of being a bum.

Of course, I thought about feeling like lovers even during sex, and I thought about a secret sexual relationship like a master-slave relationship.

I mix bodies with a relationship that’s both a younger sister and a master.

Since the beginning was a relationship that started because we were attracted to each other, isn’t it okay to want that much?

Was I the only one who thought that way?

“Then what’s the reason for talking about this like this?”

“Excluding all that, I’m an adult. Isn’t it okay to hear about the decision on something we’re doing together?”

“You’re just playing at home anyway. Just come with me, why are you arguing? Do you really think you’re better than me just because we had some sex?”

Normally, I would have lost it here and cursed.

But the pill I took now made me calm and able to answer calmly because it made my head empty.

That pill is really a vitamin.

“…Watch your mouth. You and I both liked it, right? It’s not like I forced myself on you, why are you saying such harsh things?”

“Isn’t it funny? In less than a month, you’re suddenly trying to act like an older brother, and today you’re arguing about why I didn’t tell you about something we were going to do anyway?”

“…”

“There’s a reason why I was excited because I didn’t even know your face in that process. But, does that make you feel superior?”

“…Ji-hye.”

“Wake up. We’re just both horny and mixed our bodies, wake up, Kim Sun-ho.”

“……Ji-hye… Let’s stop this.”

My head is throbbing.

Today, even in the darkness, I feel like I can clearly see the eyes staring blankly at me.

Is it because of the pill? Is it really just that we had sex because we were horny?

If there’s no horniness, is she really waking up after taking that bad pill?

Or is there something wrong with the pill that’s making her say that?

I gradually crumpled my expression. It wasn’t an atmosphere to relax my face and talk.

“What are you stopping? Let’s just talk about everything.”

“…Aren’t you acting like this because you took the pill in my room? It could be because of that… At least those kinds of stories later…”

“Later when?”

She lifted the blanket and sat down with her feet on the floor, looking at me.

“Would you tell me that story later? I can’t.”

“Please calm down and a little later…”

“So later when, when we’re both having sex and becoming sex buddies?”

“That’s not what I mean, Ji-hye, please calm down. What’s wrong with you today?”

Is it really the effect of the pill, today it wasn’t sharp, but prickly like a thorn.

Each word stabs my head, leaving scars and making it impossible to forget.

“Or when we become lovers? If not, when?”

“Calm down, Kim Ji-hye, please calm down and let’s talk.”

“You tell me, why do you seem superior just because you had sex once with a younger sister who always cursed and teased you?”

I flinched.

Still, I didn’t avoid her gaze.

Even though my body tensed up without me knowing, I quietly endured it.

“That’s right. If it was normal, you wouldn’t have been able to say anything and would have followed me when I said let’s go, because you don’t have anything going for you.”

“That’s a little different from this, right? Please calm down and talk.”

“But after we had sex, no, you’re full of confidence. As if you’ve become superior, is that really how it feels?”

“Kim Ji-hye.”

“No, we’re just both attached to each other’s bodies. A woman with no experience, just got attached because she heard sweet words and sexual preferences from a man while having sex.”

“…So you’re saying that you and I are just a couple who are horny for each other and had sex for a while?”

“Isn’t that right?”

Hoo-

I sighed.

…Of course, it would be a lie if I said I wasn’t horny when I saw Ji-hye.

I thought she had a horny body from the first time I saw her, and even after knowing she was my sister, I thought she had a horny body.

To be honest, I thought about feeling like lovers while having sex, and it was like that at the department store too.

So does that mean all of this was just my delusion?

Was I just mistaken that my sister was horny for my body as a close relationship?

“…No, I was half serious even if it’s embarrassing. It wasn’t just about having sex and ending it. From the beginning, our partner relationship wasn’t just for one day, it’s a relationship of trust.”

“You’re really trash.”

“…There’s no way around it even if I’m trash. Have you ever seen your Oppa lying?”

I’m an idiot and trash.

But I never lie.

It’s definitely not a lie that I’m attracted to Ji-hye as a woman, and it’s definitely not just because my body is excited.

She’s an attractive and beautiful woman who’s too good for me, but I just went with it because of my identity as her Oppa and the fact that we were horny for each other.

…Is this really a lie? Is it really just a relationship where we got attached to each other’s bodies and had sex… Is that the truth?

I rubbed my forehead and closed my eyes.

Even if I’m trash, I have nothing to say.

Still, she’s the younger sister I care about the most, and it’s true that I’m attracted to her as a woman.

Now that my head is clear, I want to make sure.

If the shoot is going to proceed tomorrow anyway, it’s already scheduled, so if it proceeds, I have to make sure I do it right.

When we’re asked what kind of relationship we have at a public shooting location, siblings and lovers are big.

‘…Even if it’s sudden, it’s something to draw a line on.’

In a way, Ji-hye’s decision to shoot as she pleases is a divine move.

Before an important event, I got the time and opportunity to sort things out before being introduced to other people’s eyes.

“I don’t mind if you see me as trash. But let’s draw a line.”

I opened my eyes and looked at Ji-hye.

“I’m going to ask you what kind of relationship we have when we’re shooting tomorrow anyway. What kind of relationship do you want to have then?”

“Is that important? Why are you talking about the shooting permission story, now?”

“Because it’s a place you wanted to do and wanted to go. Depending on the answer, it could be the last respect.”

“If I don’t answer, are you going to treat me like a fucking jobless bum again?”

“…No.”

I stretched out and put my legs on the bed.

“I pretended to be lovers at the department store, you said it shouldn’t be seen by others, right?”

Ji-hye nodded instead of speaking.

“…But I can be seen. If you allow it.”

“What do you mean?”

“…”

I was silent.

Yeah, I had to make sure anyway.

Eun-ha also appealed to me. She gave a clear opinion that she wanted to be my girlfriend.

Se-ah… I still don’t know. Hyun-ji also appealed to me in her own way.

So now Ji-hye is the only one left.

It may be sudden, but now is the only time.

A clear decision depending on how to introduce the relationship tomorrow at the shoot.

It’s important whether we remain siblings or lovers to the people outside.

You never know what will happen in life, and you don’t know how that rumor will spread and come back, right?

“If you allow it, I’ll say I’m your boyfriend.”

“…What?”

“If you allow it here today, I’ll say I’m your boyfriend when they ask about our relationship at the shoot tomorrow.”

“Do you think that will work?”

Lovers, siblings.

It’s not something that siblings who have already had sex should say, but it doesn’t matter.

If we just think of it as practicing being lovers until we each have a lover, it’s hard to see it as ‘Are you crazy?’ right?

It’s enough to just pass it off as ‘They’re a unique sibling’ though.

“That’s why I’m asking.”

“I can’t answer because you’re asking so suddenly.”

She brought the blanket again, covered her body, and looked at me.

I didn’t avoid her gaze that was staring intently, and I looked at her too.

“It’s not a lie that we pretended to be lovers outside.”

“…”

“We’re compatible with each other anyway. Then let’s just be confident, we don’t even need to be lovers.”

I sat next to Ji-hye, who had buried her face.

“Let’s at least go to a relationship of trust as partners.”

“…”

“I, Kim Ji-hye, you’re not great as a younger sister… But I think a relationship of trust as a woman would be okay.”

I’m a fucking idiot.

Aww. After setting the mood and saying that to the girl who had been whining so much, all I said was ‘Let’s make sure our partner relationship is solid?’

That’s all you said when your younger sister was whining so much?

It’s so out of the blue that I’m going crazy. If there was a mouse hole, I’d go in and squeak right away.

“…Honestly, I get horny when I see Oppa.”

“…What?”

Ji-hye started talking with her face buried in the blanket.

“From the first day I saw you at the cafe, honestly, I was horny… From the beginning, we saw each other because we were compatible.”

“T, that’s right?”

“Even when you played with me at home, had sex, and did that at the department store, I was horny… That’s why I’m even more crazy.”

…It’s not like Ji-hye.

I’ve never heard such kind words except when we’re having sex…

“My head recognizes you as Oppa, but my body doesn’t… I just see you as a man.”

She raised her head, sobbing.

She looked at me with tears streaming down her face.

It was something that should have been asked and sorted out a long time ago.

Not by calculating what would happen tomorrow, but from before we had sex.

We should have decided on each other from the time we saw each other at the cafe.

Not just being sweet on the bed vaguely.

We should have decided from the beginning whether we would be siblings outside or inside…

Not in a state where there’s still horniness left after sex, but in a serious situation like this.

I’m really less than trash for just thinking it was good that we had sex without doing that.

It’s too trashy that I only thought about myself. There’s no room to refute this.

“I did that on purpose just now too. I thought it would be okay if I got rid of some of my feelings… Honestly, we’re siblings.”

She buried her face in my arms, crying.

“…We’re siblings, but is it okay to do this? Isn’t it possible that even Oppa will have problems because of my greed? Even if I’ve done a lot for Oppa, is it okay to do this?”

I’m going crazy.

We were thinking the opposite of each other.

The younger sister for the older brother, the older brother for the younger sister.

We maintained an ambiguous relationship to prevent each other from getting twisted.

We mixed bodies at home, and we were on an ambiguous boundary of being Oppa and younger sister outside.

I pretended to care for my younger sister because I hadn’t done anything for her. You trash…

But Ji-hye conversely worried about whether it was okay to do this even though she had done things for me.

She worried about whether it was okay to have such greed even though she knew it would be a social problem for each other.

…And I broke that by speaking out because of the pill.

I pushed away everything that had happened so far and returned to the starting point.

‘Is it okay for close siblings to keep doing this?’

Even if I keep thinking while patting Ji-hye, who is crying in my arms, the answer doesn’t come easily.

…I thought my uncle might be able to help with this.