Chapter 473: Ten Thousand (Ten Thousand)

There is a nameless woman.

No, she had acquired names a few times, but she never grew attached to them or put any stock in them.

Names that would disappear eventually anyway once time passed.

Getting attached to them would only cause trouble.

Because if she did, they would remain in her heart and bother her when she repeated the next cycle.

The woman had to keep repeating her life.

That was the task given to her until she reached the desired outcome.

How many times had that been?

The number was too vast to count or recall.

If she really had to pinpoint it, the ‘first’ time she could recall was around the time she had surpassed a thousand repetitions.

The number wasn’t important anymore.

Let’s just call it ten thousand (萬) for simplicity.

It was likely several times more than that, but the woman decided to just think of it as ten thousand.

Countless lives.

A point where she had lost the original purpose, wondering what she had to repeat her life for.

By repeating the process and moving in a slightly better direction, she had arrived here.

Despite that, the woman still tried hard to recall memories.

She had to remember the times she had a name.

She had to record the times she could smile, even briefly.

Because that was the driving force that allowed the woman to endure.

-■■ah.

She recalled the name that called her affectionately, albeit sounding brusque.

It was a name she would never hear again.

Because when she returned to the beginning, everything became as if it never happened.

Even memories that should have been important were often twisted into delusions.

The woman had done many things during her long life.

She had become the head of the foremost merchant guild in the Central Plains.

She had also been the leader of the largest courier guild in history.

There was also a life where she became the leader of the Martial Alliance.

And memories of becoming the head of a prominent family.

She had lived so many lives.

And done so many things.

Yet, the woman’s end was always the same.

A collapsing world.

Or a world she herself brought down.

She was engulfed in despair as the world crumbled.

No matter what kind of life she lived, the end was always like that.

Nothing changed.

She had done countless things trying to make it different, but the conclusion was always the same.

What was the meaning of such repetition?

Was there truly a better way?

Why did this happen to her?

These were the constant worries she pondered through long thoughts and long years.

Of course, even those worries had dulled and blurred before the relentless march of time.

But she had never stopped.

In reality, pondering didn’t change anything.

She just lived on like that.

That is why the woman…

Hated her other half, who looked exactly like her.

And also, envied her.

In the repeating lives, unlike herself, her other half could embrace oblivion.

She truly envied her other half, who could maintain the same beliefs because she experienced oblivion.

Amidst her countless experiences, she recalled hundreds of lives where she had maintained her beliefs.

There were times the woman had tried to save the world.

There were times she thought of that as her belief, her given mission.

It was laughable.

Even such firm beliefs were bound to rot and dull before countless years.

The woman was just like that.

What remained for her now were neither beliefs nor a sense of mission.

Those had long since rusted and crumbled away, leaving nothing behind.

All that remained for her were faint memories.

-Spicy food isn’t really my thing. It lacks flavor.

To the voice that grumbled after she had gone to the trouble of making it.

-It’s cold. Isn’t it?

To the awkwardness of uttering nonsense just to try and hold her hand.

-…I’m going first. Sorry.

And even the determination with which she offered her neck to save the woman.

She remembered it all desperately.

She just lived on.

As time flowed, she gave up many things.

Each time she let something go, it felt like her heart was being torn apart, but…

She had to let them go, one by one.

Because that was the only way she could survive.

The woman? No.

The woman never cherished her own life.

If she died, she could just start over from the beginning.

That wasn’t what she cherished.

She started with trivial things and ended up letting go of precious ones.

She let go of the name someone used to call her.

She let go of the hand that used to hold hers so tenderly.

She stopped the steps that always sought them out first.

It was during the days she still counted that she finally realized.

That although she wanted to protect them…

Doing so meant she couldn’t protect them at all.

She discarded and discarded.

She felt her heart being ripped out every single time.

This feeling didn’t seem to dull.

She had to discard one more thing.

Only then could she survive.

Not ‘me’. But ‘him’.

The world, breaking down and breaking down again as it reached its end.

There was only one thing the woman wished for.

Rather than wishing for her own oblivion.

For him to live in a world without a predetermined end.

Belief and pride.

Rather than those useless things that dulled with time.

Those were more important to the nameless woman.

That’s why she gave up on getting closer even more.

Unlike her own nature, he was someone who could easily throw away his life for others.

Because there were countless lives where people burned through their lives living only for themselves.

Ironically.

In lives without her, he mostly survived for a long time.

Until the world collapsed and decayed.

Denying it, and after living a few more times…

The woman could finally give up denying it.

He lives only when she is gone.

Even though she was certain of that, the reason she couldn’t easily let go was her sordid attachment and greed.

Isn’t it the same now?

She clings to it, unable to give up being by his side until the end.

While finding vicarious satisfaction in looking at her other half, she couldn’t let go of her petty jealousy.

There are definitely things she knows she must discard, yet cannot let go of until the very end.

That is why she couldn’t help but be so surprised.

“Someone told me.”

At first, he was an enemy she cursed to death.

“That it was you who sent my time back to the past.”

Later, he became a cherished friend.

And even later, for him, who became a husband she named and called upon.

“They said it was you. Is that right?”

Because it meant the woman had discarded even the things she couldn’t let go of until the very end.

---

The Heavenly Demon’s eyes, upon hearing my question, clearly held a look of surprise.

I had never seen eyes open so wide.

To think that eyes always filled with arrogance and something cold could widen so much.

It resembled the expression the current life’s Wi Seol-ah used to wear, but…

‘What is she talking about?’

I immediately erased the thought from my mind.

It must be a misconception because their faces are similar.

How could that terrifying being be the same as that bland person?

‘A misconception because their faces are identical.’

Thinking about it, that was also a problem.

Comparing the faces of the fallen Little Sword Saint and the Heavenly Demon behind me, one could say they were the same person, aside from hair color and eye pupils.

How could that be?

At the same time.

‘The reason this arm is acting so crazy.’

The hostility still felt from my left arm was also bothersome.

This was a sensation I felt from the Blood Demon, yet…

Why do I feel this same emotion from the Heavenly Demon?

Conversely, why don’t I feel it from Wi Seol-ah?

‘What is this?’

What on earth are these two?

At least… it seems correct that the Heavenly Demon is related to the Blood Demon.

If that’s the case, it means the Heavenly Demon and Wi Seol-ah are related, so…

Does that mean the Blood Demon and Wi Seol-ah are also related?

‘The Blood Demon and Wi Seol-ah?’

How?

If I think about that, the story gets too complicated.

I would have to delve into how Sword Saint raised someone like Wi Seol-ah as his granddaughter.

It meant this wasn’t something to think about right now.

‘Right now.’

What’s important to me right now is only the Heavenly Demon in front of me.

I couldn’t think of anything else with her standing before me.

Because there wouldn’t be any lunatic who could think of anything else while facing such an immense presence.

Moreover, the Heavenly Demon, who was rarely seen stiffened like this.

‘…Could I win if I ambushed her now?’

Such a trivial thought crossed my mind, but I knew it was impossible.

I had just witnessed firsthand how the Little Sword Saint was defeated.

No, rather than witnessing it, I couldn’t even see it because it was too fast.

‘The road ahead is damn long.’

Seeing that, I keenly realized how high the place I aimed for was.

I understood that merely being at the Hwajing realm was nowhere near enough.

Recalling something I already knew well was quite an uncomfortable thing.

“…Hmm.”

The Heavenly Demon froze for a moment after hearing my question.

Then she quickly relaxed and rested her chin on her hand.

She looked like she was lost in thought.

And after a moment.

Deudeudeudeuk-!

She released the force from her hand that had been holding and closing the crack.

Ppeojeojeojeok-!

As the pressure on the forcibly closed crack was released, it revealed itself again, as if unleashing pent-up power.

Then.

Kku-uk-!

“…!”

I felt the sensation of my body being pulled towards the crack, just like before.

As I panicked and tried to channel energy into my body.

“Is that so? It seems there’s no other answer but that, after all.”

The Heavenly Demon muttered as she looked at me.

“My interest has waned.”

The Heavenly Demon’s eyes, as she said that, seemed to have lost a bit of their luster.

“What are you suddenly talking about…”

“If you enter through this door, you will be able to return to your original world.”

“…What?”

At those words, I looked at the opened crack.

So that crack I was wondering about was a door leading back to the world I came from?

‘Why did that suddenly pop out?’

I was dumbfounded.

What have I even done here?

‘If it’s like this, what does regret even have to do with it?’

It has absolutely nothing to do with what Tang Jemun said.

Pointing at the open door, the Heavenly Demon spoke.

“Go now.”

“…I haven’t heard the answer to my question yet.”

At my barely uttered words, the Heavenly Demon let out a scoff.

“You know you didn’t ask that question just to hear the answer in the first place.”

“…”

“Did you really think I wouldn’t know?”

I swallowed hard at the Heavenly Demon’s words. I thought I had gotten through to her, but it seemed she had figured out my intention immediately.

To be precise, it would be good to hear the answer, but as she said, that wasn’t the main point.

It was merely to buy time and divert her attention.

However.

‘That answer means…’

Can I take that as confirmation that she was indeed the one who sent my time back?

“…Why?”

I blurted out the question without realizing it.

Why, exactly?

How, and by what means, did she make me regress?

“Why you…”

“I don’t know. I am not a person from the world you were in.”

“Don’t lie. You know…”

“A lie?”

The Heavenly Demon’s brow furrowed upon hearing my words.

Along with that, an immense pressure burst forth from her body.

“Do not presume to judge me when you know nothing about me. I am quite displeased.”

“…”

Perhaps her mood was disturbed, as her words, spat out with a pout, were quite chilling.

Just by releasing her pressure, the air seemed to distort.

I couldn’t utter any response, suffocating under that pressure.

“You are not originally a being of this world, so disappear.”

“…I… still haven’t.”

“You have fulfilled the will of this world. This door is proof of that.”

The Heavenly Demon said so, but…

I did nothing.

No matter what choice I make, the outcome will not change.

Those were the words Tang Jemun spat at me.

Based on that, I realized I hadn’t accomplished anything since coming to this world.

Perhaps sensing my expression, the Heavenly Demon continued speaking, maintaining her cold gaze.

“You seem to be mistaken about something.”

“…What?”

“In the first place, no matter what you do, nothing will change.”

“What do you mean…”

-Are you afraid of Sword Empress dying protecting you? Do you wish to save her?

“…!”

-Or are you afraid of that trash behind you getting hurt?

My entire body stiffened at the words the Heavenly Demon casually uttered.

How on earth does the Heavenly Demon know that?

Leaving me stunned, the Heavenly Demon continued speaking.

“I don’t know what you dreamed of. It seems even the being who sent you to this world has its blind spots.”

“…You…”

“As long as I exist, there is nothing you can change.”

“Just… what exactly are you.”

How do you know even that?

“What a ridiculous question. You already know my identity, don’t you?”

The Heavenly Demon smiled as she looked at me.

“I am the Heavenly Demon (天魔). I have no other name. Even if I did.”

Saying so, the Heavenly Demon calmly stroked my cheek.

Whether it was something she did, my stiffened body couldn’t escape the touch of the Heavenly Demon’s hand.

My arm trembled.

Perhaps displeased by the Heavenly Demon’s touch, my left arm trembled madly.

Glancing at my arm, the Heavenly Demon spoke to me with a slight curve of her eyes.

“I’ve already forgotten.”

Simultaneously with her words, the demonic mirror gate rapidly grew larger.

“You should do the same.”

And just like that, the crack swallowed me whole.