Chapter 381: Well Done.

“I know.”

I had to hold my breath at Father’s words.

I had somewhat expected that kind of answer.

If Mother were alive, the only person who would know where she is.

That would naturally be only Father. I looked into Father’s eyes and asked.

“…Where is she? Mother.”

I needed to know where Mother was.

Not just for the common reason of missing Mother.

Because I was gradually starting to realize that Mother was involved in everything connected to me.

Including the beast within my body, and Mother’s identity, known as the second calamity.

Even the name ‘Master of Ten Thousand Realms’.

And the most important among them was.

‘The matter concerning the Divine Sword.’

The voice that had enveloped me and spoken just before sending the Divine Sword away was clearly Mother’s.

How could I forget?

It was a voice that lingered, impossible to forget even if I wanted to.

Mother had definitely told me to embrace the Divine Sword within me.

Having heard those words, I was now carrying the Divine Sword’s energy within my body.

Perhaps Mother might also know a way to meet the Divine Sword again.

That’s what I thought.

Therefore, to know the truth about all these matters, I ultimately had to meet Mother in person.

“If you know, please tell me.”

“…”

To my question, Father looked at me without showing any particular reaction.

I wondered why he was so unresponsive.

But looking closely at Father’s eyes, I could understand.

‘He’s not unresponsive.’

Father’s pupils were subtly trembling.

Seeing that, I was waiting patiently until Father gave me an answer.

After a brief silence passed like that, Father spoke to me.

“…Why do you want to know that?”

At the answer I heard, I had to frown in front of Father, which was rare.

Why do I want to know that?

At Father’s words, I felt a sudden churning in my gut.

“Is it strange for a child to want to know where their mother is?”

“…”

“…It’s not just that I want to know. I want to know now, even if it’s this late.”

How long has it been since this happened?

To think a day would come when I’d raise my voice in front of Father.

It was the first time since my regression, and it was a moment that could be counted on one hand even in my past life.

It was also a situation that warranted it.

It was something I didn’t know even at the moment my heart burst and I died.

If Mother were alive somewhere.

And if she were connected to my current life.

Even if she weren’t connected to it, it was a fact I should have known somehow.

“If you know, you can tell me, can’t you?”

Despite my words, Father remained unmoved.

That silence was incredibly frustrating.

“Family Head….”

“What do you intend to do if you find out where your mother is?”

I faltered for a moment at Father’s sudden question.

But I immediately spoke up.

“I will go find her.”

“To where your mother is?”

“Yes.”

I didn’t speak a lie.

It was the question for that purpose, and Father likely already guessed it.

“…That is not a place you can go just because you want to.”

“Why? Because it’s the Demonic Mirror Realm?”

“…”

“If not, is it because I have to become the Young Family Head? Or perhaps.”

Father’s eyes, which I rarely saw clearly, seemed particularly sharp today.

“Is it because Mother is a calamity?”

“…!”

The moment I spoke.

Grrrgrgr-!

Heat erupted from Father’s body, spreading outwards.

I almost involuntarily took a step back from that dense energy, but I managed to hold my ground.

If it were usual times, maybe, but now I didn’t want to be pushed back.

Amidst the spreading heat, Father’s eyes looked quite sharp.

Was he frowning?

Or was he angry?

I wasn’t used to Father’s facial expressions, so I couldn’t tell.

“…How do you know that?”

Was that a reaction to the words that Mother was a calamity?

If so, it meant Father knew about the existence of the calamity and also that Mother was the calamity.

“I heard….”

Kwoooowoo-!

Just as I was about to answer, a heavy presence burst forth from Father.

I felt my chest sink with that energy.

“From whom. Who dared to tell you such a thing?”

‘…Damn.’

Father seemed quite angry, as the heat gradually intensified.

It was at a level quite similar to the heat I felt earlier.

Where did he get angry?

Was the problem itself that I heard the story?

“…That’s not what’s important right now.”

“No, it is important. So tell me.”

“…”

His eyes conveyed that I couldn’t get past this without speaking.

Seeing those eyes, I resignedly spoke.

“…I heard it from the World Tree, called the Master.”

“…”

Father’s eyes trembled upon hearing the story.

The World Tree had mentioned it.

That Father and Mother had come to meet it.

That meant Father also knew about the World Tree.

Father’s reaction was unusual, as if my words were true.

“How… how do you know that? Could it be….”

Father’s large hand grasped my shoulder.

“Did you go there?”

“If it’s the place where the World Tree is, then yes.”

The False World. It meant the place where the imprisoned World Tree was.

As I spoke my answer, Father’s expression contorted.

Why? Why was he making that face?

As the question arose in my mind, Father spoke to me.

“The reason you broke through the wall. Is that also an influence from that place?”

The reason I was able to reach the Martial Realm at such a young age.

Father was asking if it was the influence of the Demonic Mirror Realm.

“There was an influence.”

I did receive help.

Because thanks to the time spent there, I could shorten the path to reaching the Martial Realm.

However, the more I spoke, the worse Father’s expression became.

“That is not a place one can go carelessly. How did you end up going there?”

“…It just happened that way.”

“How long, how long were you there?”

He seemed to know that time flowed differently there than here.

I turned my thoughts to Father’s question.

How long was it?

I didn’t count the days, so I don’t know exactly.

I think I counted up to about three or four years.

After that, I didn’t pay attention because it was unnecessary.

“I wasn’t there for too long.”

Father didn’t look convinced.

What could possibly be such a problem that he’s making such a grim face?

‘It’ll be the same once I return anyway.’

Even in the False World, I could feel hunger and thirst.

If needed, I could just kill monsters to fill my stomach.

If I was thirsty, I could quench it with blood.

If I felt the unique poison of monsters, I could purify it with my inner energy, and if I couldn’t purify it all, I could just move while enduring the pain.

As long as I didn’t die, there was no problem.

As a result, I reached the Martial Realm.

Furthermore, I was able to cross over to the Mortal Realm with the enlightenment I gained there.

What is the problem?

I couldn’t understand Father’s reaction.

It was concerning, but that wasn’t what I needed to ask right now.

“I heard that you, Family Head, also went to that place with Mother.”

“Did she say that?”

Her? The way Father referred to the World Tree subtly bothered me.

“Yes.”

“…It seems she spoke carelessly.”

I flinched at the intense anger contained in his voice.

The World Tree was, after all, a being who was the master of the Central Plains.

Yet Father spoke chillingly, as if it were nothing.

“The reason you won’t tell me. Is it truly because Mother is the calamity that descended upon the world?”

“If that is the case, what will you do?”

“Even if that’s true, nothing changes. I must hear it.”

“…”

Hearing my answer, Father stared intently at me.

Just as I thought he might finally give me an answer.

“I forbid it.”

“…!”

At Father’s response, I gritted my teeth.

Is Father still going to refuse even after coming this far?

“Why… I’ve learned quite a bit now. I believe I have the right to hear at least this much.”

I wondered if Father was also under some restriction, but I felt that wasn’t the case.

It was just a hunch, but my intuition had never been wrong in situations like this.

Just as my expression was about to contort.

“How many regrets have you had in your life?”

Father brought up a rather abrupt topic.

“…Regrets?”

I paused for a moment at the sudden question.

Regrets?

How many regrets have I had?

“I’ve had plenty of those.”

I said with a hollow laugh.

What’s the point of saying it? Regret was like my life.

I’d done it to the point of being sick of it, and perhaps I’d have to do it to the point of being sick of it in the future too.

But why was Father asking something like this?

“This Family Head…. No, I haven’t had many regrets in my life.”

That was a sudden statement. A life without many regrets.

It was a life I truly envied.

Whether he knew my thoughts or not, Father continued speaking.

“I lived a life that deliberately avoided regrets. Because I thought excessive lingering was meaningless.

I lived like that, yet do you know what few regrets remain for me?”

Regrets Father has.

“…I don’t know.”

There was no way I could know.

As I answered cautiously, Father spoke to me as if he had been waiting.

“Those regrets lie with you and your mother.”

“…!”

The words pierced my heart like daggers.

I never thought he would say something like that.

Regrets about me and my mother? How could he say such a thing to my face?

“Right now, that…!”

Just as I was about to lose my temper and lash out.

“That day. I shouldn’t have taken you to your mother.”

Father’s words made my breath catch in my throat.

It was an unexpected statement.

The day he’s referring to now.

It meant the day Mother was swallowed by the Demonic Mirror Realm and disappeared.

“That…”

“I shouldn’t have let your mother go like that, and I shouldn’t have listened to her request to meet the young you. That is my regret.”

Just as I was about to say something, I was overcome with a sense of dissonance upon hearing Father’s words.

“…Listened to Mother’s words?”

And besides, shouldn’t have let her go like that?

Doesn’t this make it seem as if Mother left willingly?

“…”

“That day. Was the reason you took me there because of Mother’s words?”

Father didn’t answer my question, but I could tell from his expression that it was affirmative.

‘What kind of bullshit is this?’

It’s still vivid.

The memory of that time still surfaced in my mind from time to time.

A winter night.

My hands and ears were flushed red from the cold.

As my mind, gone blank white, started to clear, Mother’s touch was on my cheek, and Father was looking down at me.

I remembered everything without exception: the unknown Demonic Mirror Realm gate open behind us, and Mother’s tears.

That was precisely the point when my life began to fall apart, so how could I forget?

Until now, I had naturally assumed Father dragged me there.

‘Actually, Mother wanted to see me?’

This was a story I had never known.

“I shouldn’t have granted her wish to see you one last time either.”

The moonlight cast shadows, making Father’s expression suddenly hard to see.

If Father’s words were truly true.

“Why are you telling me this now?”

It was a statement far too late.

I had lived believing that Mother met that fate because of this damn family’s karma and Father’s choices.

I had feared Father for deliberately showing me Mother’s final moments then.

As if.

It seemed to imply that if I refused the karma I was meant to bear, I too would end up like that.

But now, if he said that wasn’t the case.

“…It’s too late, isn’t it?”

It was already a story far too late.

Whether those words were true or not, we had come too far.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Even if not about everything else, if you had told me at least this much beforehand.”

“Do you think anything would have changed if you had?”

“…”

I couldn’t bring myself to answer ‘yes’ to his question.

Because by now, I knew it wasn’t quite like that.

Even so.

“…Then did you wish for me to crumble with resentment towards you, Family Head?”

My past life was like that.

I collapsed and crumbled, sinking down despicably.

Did Father truly not know that I would fall apart like that?

At the words I spoke, filled with various emotions, Father took several breaths.

Those breaths felt somehow heavy.

“People, no matter who they are, when faced with a situation too difficult to endure.”

They flowed out with his breath.

“They tend to find someone to blame.”

The words, spoken aimlessly, were enough to stir up my mind.

“If you absolutely need such a being, wouldn’t it be better to blame an incompetent father than to blame a world you cannot face?”

“…”

It stung. It stung deeply, though I didn’t know why.

This wasn’t the kind of thing I wanted to hear.

I just needed to know where Mother was.

I didn’t want to know this now.

“…It’s contradictory.”

“Yes.”

“Even if, by any chance, there was your consideration in that place, it is not justifiable that you just watched me fall apart without intervening.”

It was my fault for not overcoming it and starting to break down.

But regardless, it was Father who left me to become that way without helping me up.

“You’re not going to say that you wanted me to blame myself for that too, are you?”

I was swept away by the wind.

It felt like the emotions that had accumulated over the past days were surging all at once.

Where had these feelings been buried to surface now?

I thought I had been living fine without paying them any mind.

On one hand, I had a thought.

If Father had tried to grab me and lift me up when I was falling apart like that.

Would I have really changed?

It was something I couldn’t know because it hadn’t happened.

Even if it might have changed things, I hoped it wouldn’t have.

Because if that were the case.

I would feel too pathetic for not having gone through such things.

So please.

“Yes.”

I hoped Father wouldn’t look at me with those eyes.

“That too is my regret.”

I wished he would look at me with the cold, indifferent eyes he always had.

“Knowing I shouldn’t, I failed to reach out. It is my sin.”

I hoped he wouldn’t look at me with such bitter eyes.

“I am sorry.”

“…”

“That is why, even more so, I cannot send you to your mother. My regrets are enough with just this.”

At Father’s apology, which I never expected to hear.

Something I had barely held back inside shattered into pieces.

If he had at least made excuses, saying he couldn’t help it or didn’t have time to care for me, it would have been better.

Father didn’t utter any such words.

That’s why it makes me feel even more disgusted.

I immediately covered my face with trembling hands.

It wasn’t because tears were streaming down disgracefully.

It was because I couldn’t bear to meet Father’s eyes.

It would have been easier if I hadn’t heard his apology.

How did it come to this?

‘…Ah.’

I shouldn’t have received such an apology from Father.

Even though he was the Father I feared and resented so much.

He shouldn’t have apologized to me.

Because of all the trouble I’ve caused? Because he’s my father regardless?

No.

That’s not the reason.

It was a more fundamental reason than that.

At the very least.

Truly, at the very least.

One should not apologize to the child who killed them.

Like the winter night I sent Mother away, a memory I couldn’t forget, lodged in a corner of my mind, resurfaced.

-Well done.

Father’s words praising me for reaching the Martial Realm.

And Father’s appearance as he spoke to me at the final moment overlap.

Yes, Father’s end.

In my past life, Father, who was the only one to wound the Heavenly Demon besides Wi Seol-ah.

Died not long after.

In the Central Plains, everyone would have naturally thought the Heavenly Demon killed Father.

But the reality was different.

The Heavenly Demon did not kill Father.

The one who killed Father was not the Heavenly Demon, but.

It was me.