The Truth of Existence

Around Jin-shian, who introduced himself as Ross of Yearning, countless translucent geometric patterns spiraled in multiple layers, and spheres of white-shining magic created rune characters, revealing their presence like stars in the universe.

A technique close to omnipotence, the likes of which I had never seen before, impossible even for Archmage Ellie. Just looking at it allowed me to experience the phenomenon of ‘awakening (開眼).’ Ross of Yearning had transcended the realm of transcendence and reached an uncharted level above it.

Feeling my heart pounding, I paused for a moment and asked Jin-shian in a flat voice.

,Why did you attach the word ‘Yearning’ to yourself?

Jin-shian, who was creating a beautiful pink sky around him that looked like it belonged on the ceiling of a club room, frowned at my question.

,Somehow, you ask about the most important things first. It’s hard to explain.

Jin-shian, who dispelled the magic surrounding him and returned to his original ordinary clothes, sat on the sofa and chuckled.

,The reason I attached ‘Yearning’ to myself is simple. It’s to distinguish the various Rosses in the multiverse. Ross of that world, Ross of this world… it’s hard to say it like that, right? Each was given a name at will for easy distinction. Ross of Hope, Ross of Despair, and so on. By the way, as I said earlier, I’ll call you the Worst Ross. No rebuttals allowed. Bang, bang!

Seeing Jin-shian waving an invisible magic wand, I threw out a question to somehow draw out more of the story.

,Were you watching the Rosses of other worlds from here?

,Yes, I’m an observer, after all. I’m just watching with interest what choices the other Rosses make. I never interfere. There are many existences I need to hide my presence from.

At Jin-shian’s words, I bit my lip. The fundamental contradiction I had felt before stimulates my heart.

,If there were many Rosses from other worlds… then what am I?

,I told you, the Worst Ross.

,That’s not what I mean!

As I shouted, Jin-shian, who was drinking cola, stretched his lips into a long smile. I glared at Jin-shian and continued.

,If there are countless me’s in the multiverse… what the hell is my existence? Did Jin-shian, who possessed the novel, split into Rosses in countless multiverses? Or are you a copied existence with the same soul as me? How can you so easily accept that there’s another me exactly like me? Is there even an existence that can be called the real Jin-shian?

Just the fact that a Ross called Dantalian existed in the Demon World made me feel an instinctive unpleasantness. It was a fundamental instinct that comes from having the same existence as oneself. Isn’t rejecting a doppelganger a human instinct?

But since I hadn’t directly met a Ross from another world, the question that had stopped at a level of concern exploded when I met Jin-shian, who was wearing my own face, right in front of me. Endless doubts and denials about my existence are pushing the existence of Jin-shian in front of me out of my head, forcing me to erase it. Reacting to that will, I desperately held back my butt from twitching.

Jin-shian, wearing a strange smile, said sharply.

,A fundamental argument, huh? Your anxiety only comes from uncertain information. I know the truth of the Akashic Records, so I’ve just accepted everything.

My heart beats like crazy. It starts to run wild as if it wants to explode on its own. The essence of me begins to crumble. Noticing that, Jin-shian placed his magic-filled hand on my shoulder. As if I had been given a tranquilizer, my heart, which had been wildly running wild, continues with a gentle beat as if nothing had happened.

,Cool your head a bit. Questions about the meaning of existence are a disease of doubt that leads to self-destruction. Don’t try to understand everything in the universe, just accept it and you’ll be able to endure it.

I let out a deep sigh and swept my face once.

,…I’m sorry. I thought I was the only one, of course. I never thought that so many other me’s would be possessing other worlds. This wasn’t even a discarded setting.

Jin-shian suddenly clapped his hands. He twisted only one corner of his mouth as if he had come up with some mischievous idea and said to me.

,Okay, let’s talk about it one by one from there. Haven’t you ever questioned your possession?

,Question…? Of course, I have. I was curious why I had to possess the novel I wrote. I didn’t even stop writing in the middle, and I didn’t even get a 5700-character comment from the readers for the worst ending. Now I’m suspecting that my possession is to solve the setting errors about the cult leader.

,Hoo, to infer that far with uncertain information. Maybe your unique ability isn’t space magic after all.

,Wait, my unique ability is space magic…? I just used the opportunity that Rosaline should have gotten.

At my answer, Jin-shian scoffed as if it were ridiculous.

,Don’t you remember what Ellie said in the previous world? Even Ellie, who had reached the realm of Archmage, couldn’t recognize spatial coordinates and create dimensional passages during battle. That’s because you have a natural talent close to omnipotence in space magic.

,Ha, but I had so little natural magic that I couldn’t even use space magic properly at first.

,But you solved that problem yourself.

I frowned at Jin-shian’s words as if it were obvious. How much I worked hard and suffered to use space magic freely. I don’t like him talking about it so easily.

Feeling my annoyed gaze, Jin-shian smiled and said.

,Change your perspective, don’t question why you possessed… question why you had to possess at that moment.

,What do you mean….

,Our novel begins when Roel enters Transcendence Academy and becomes a student. But we possess Ross after Roel becomes a second-year student. Haven’t you ever wondered why there’s a one-year gap in our possession?

Until now, I had never questioned the moment I possessed Ross. Strangely, I had recognized it as ‘natural.’ At Jin-shian’s words, I felt the contradiction and felt suffocated.

,Until now, your questions and my answers lead to one answer. Because that’s the truth that can explain everything. The reason why Jin-shian, who came from beyond the outer universe, could possess Ross in countless multiverse worlds, the reason why there was a one-year gap between the beginning of the novel and Ross’s possession is all….

Jin-shian deliberately paused and finished his words slowly, like a soliloquy.

,Because we were fake possessors.

,…What?

,The Jin-shian who first possessed Ross died. Maybe he’s waking up from a dream he doesn’t even remember and writing a novel.

I was so dumbfounded by Jin-shian’s words that laughter welled up. I couldn’t stop the laughter that had already leaked out. Jin-shian scratched his nose as I laughed loudly.

,Did you go crazy at the gruesome truth? Just accept it stupidly. Think of it as becoming a character in a novel, or becoming a character in a game, and it’ll be easier.

,Shut up! You’re the one who’s gone crazy! I died? And we’re fake, what the hell are you talking about! You said it was the answer, but it doesn’t explain anything!

,No, it explains it well enough. If we’re copies of the first Jin-shian. If I’m the 1031st Jin-shian, you’re the 19201st Jin-shian. The copy using the dummy data of the original Jin-shian is our truth.

I feel like I’m having a nightmare. I want to wake up from the dream by banging my forehead hard against the wall. But my heart is still maintaining a gentle beat thanks to Jin-shian’s magic. There’s no way to explode the anger churning in my chest.

,You’re still trying to deceive me. You con artist.

As I said that, getting up from the sofa, Jin-shian scoffed.

,What would I gain from telling such a lie? You’re the first Ross I’ve seen who’s so extremely one-sided. You’re really stupid. How are you the last Ross? Just looking at you now, it seems like even the remaining hope will disappear.

,Shut up! Then tell me, if we’re copies, why do we possess one year after the novel? That’s a contradiction!

At my point, Jin-shian said calmly without a hint of embarrassment.

,Of course, it’s because the Saintess needed preparation time.

,Saintess… what the hell are you talking about all of a sudden? I haven’t even met the Saintess yet.

At my words, Jin-shian sighed deeply and said.

,Someone forcibly invaded the world using plausibility due to a setting error in the novel that had reached the ending. So God possessed Jin-shian, the creator of the world, into the novel to eliminate the intruder. Because he thought that was the answer. But the first Jin-shian failed, and that world was forever trapped in a cycle of birth and destruction. God stored the soul of the Jin-shian who had died in advance in the Akashic Records, and the Saintess of the next world used it to possess us into Ross. That’s what has been repeated endlessly until now. Finding the one Jin-shian who will break the cycle of eternity, that’s God’s purpose.

Jin-shian got up from the sofa and stood in front of me. And he looked straight at me and said.

,The reason why we possess one year after the novel started is because the Saintess needed time to download and modify Jin-shian’s soul from the Akashic Records. Time to modify the souls of the Rosses who failed in other worlds, learning from the failures, to create Saintess ver. 19201 Jin-shian.

Saying that, Jin-shian wore a playful smile.

,The Saintess is a high-capacity USB for possessing the copied soul of Jin-shian into Ross. That’s why we’re fake possessors. We’re just existences that overwrote the copied data onto Ross’s soul.