episode_0067

I had a twin brother.

His name was Joo Eunseok. Despite being twins born at the same time, there was no resemblance between us, but he was like a mirror image of myself that I had never been separated from for even a moment.

Mom often tried to separate my brother from me, but I loved him more than Mom, so I rebelled against her and stayed by my brother’s side even more.

Acting childish and throwing tantrums at a young age, my brother, who always put me before himself, was so precious to me that I couldn’t live without him.

But then…

He disappeared.

Mom, who had taken my brother out, said he was dead. She said it with a smile that seemed too happy for the occasion.

Seeing Mom like that was so strange that even after holding a funeral for my brother and confirming that his remains were interred in the columbarium, I still couldn’t believe that he was dead.

However, as time passed without my brother by my side, the void left by his absence grew so large. Eventually, I had to accept it.

Even though I hadn’t seen my brother’s death with my own eyes, just the fact that he wasn’t by my side made me acknowledge everything.

Realizing for the first time since birth that my brother wasn’t by my side, I initially felt tears, followed by a feeling of emptiness in my head, and finally, a sensation of pain as if countless daggers were stabbing my heart, and I lost consciousness.

That day, at the young age of 5, I thought I didn’t want to live.

But as Mom became increasingly desolate after my brother’s disappearance, I erased the thought of wanting to die from my mind.

Maybe Mom felt guilty for not being able to prevent my brother’s death, and when I thought that far, I held Mom’s hand and told her that it wasn’t her fault.

“Yeah, it’s not my fault. It’s all that man’s fault! Everything! Everything turned out like this because of that man!! Ha, hahaha… Hahaha!!”

Mom started to break down severely.

Watching Mom deteriorate, my longing for my brother deepened, but for the sake of my only family, I had to forget my brother.

When I entered elementary school, I wanted to make Mom happy, so I showed her a spelling test paper with a perfect score.

Mom was delighted and praised me, saying that her daughter was the best, and she didn’t spare any compliments while patting my head.

Seeing her smile filled with sincerity, I wanted to continue making Mom happy, so I spent more time studying than playing.

Maybe it was because of the elementary school curriculum, but studying wasn’t as difficult as I thought, and I never missed being in first place.

But one day, Mom started making complicated expressions while praising me, indicating that there was another reason for my success, and I didn’t put extra effort into studying again.

Mom said it didn’t matter if I wasn’t in first place, as long as I did my best, but when I received average grades instead of being in the top ranks, there was something definite in the relieved expression on Mom’s face.

As time passed and I turned 14, I woke up early one morning to find Mom trying to leave the house.

When I asked where she was going so early, Mom left a note saying she was going to meet your brother and left the house.

A day passed, then two, three days passed, but Mom didn’t come back home.

I became anxious and tried to find Mom, but for a young kid who had just graduated from elementary school, it was an impossible task.

After a week passed, a man came looking for me.

The man who introduced himself as my dad informed me that my mom had passed away, tragically killed by a hit-and-run truck.

Going to meet my brother meant just that.

But even though I vaguely sensed it, everything felt so empty that I didn’t shed a single tear.

There was no time to be engulfed in sadness. I was forcibly taken away in a car by a man who claimed to have come to pick me up.

The place I was taken to was a vast estate with a grand garden that I had never seen before.

Although the sight was overwhelming, being consumed by the feeling of being alone, I couldn’t bring myself to smile.

Even if I now had a dad, I couldn’t replace my brother and mom, and I wasn’t ready to accept a new family, so I couldn’t even properly greet my new stepmom and stepbrother.

Furthermore, while a new family had been formed, unlike them who stayed in the main house, I was allocated a small room in the annex, left alone in the lonely annex.

Sometimes my dad would come looking for me, but I found his gaze towards me so repulsive that hiding in the old shed in the garden became almost a daily routine.

The servants here ignored me, sometimes even hurling insults, but the gardener always apologized and brought me books to read.

Then one day, I met my grandparents for the first time.

They found my existence distasteful, immediately frowning and harshly spewing insults.

Calling me the daughter of a prostitute who seduced their son, a disgusting illegitimate child…

After that, my memory is fuzzy.

When I came to my senses, I had run out of the house, sitting behind a building, crying.

I was angry at being called an illegitimate child and at the way they insulted my mom, but mostly, I was just lonely.

For that one reason alone, the tears wouldn’t stop.

“Have this and cheer up. Crying ruins a pretty face.”

As I cried, someone approached me and handed me a fish-shaped bun.

Raising my head to follow the voice, I saw a man. Even though his face was obscured by the setting sun, I could tell he was neutral yet quite handsome.

Although the bun the man handed me had gone cold and soggy, the taste of that bun I ate while conversing with him that day was unforgettable.

It was the first kindness I received from someone other than my mom and brother.

After bidding farewell to the man and returning home, while sorting through my things, I found the diary my mom often carried.

Feeling sad, I picked up the diary, and a photo fell out from it.

A photo of a boy my age, resembling the man who claimed to be my dad, named Han Eun-seok.

“Brother…?”

Confirming the name written on the photo as Han Eun-seok, I finally asked my stepmom to investigate the identity of the man.

And I finally realized that my brother was alive.

But due to the events of that day, I was no longer able to leave the house again.

Whether going to school or coming back, I was never given the freedom to be alone. This led to being ostracized at school, even by my peers and teachers.

Still, I endured it. I endured countless pains in anticipation of the day I would meet my brother.

Years later, after graduating from high school, I received news from my stepmom that I had to move to a different house.

I was more relieved to finally be free than to have to marry a man I didn’t know, so I immediately packed my bags and ran away.

Because now that I was free, I could go meet my brother.

But as I was heading to that man’s house, I ended up in an unexpected accident.

A truck came rushing towards me as if it was targeting me.

I realized too late that I couldn’t avoid being hit by the truck.

It should have been clear…

As I stared at the bewildering truck, my body was pushed by someone.

When I turned my head feeling like time had slowed down, there was a man standing with his arms outstretched.

It was my brother.

Without a doubt, my brother.

It was Joo Eun-seok.

Realizing that, I reflexively reached out towards my brother.

But that was all.

With a loud crash, my brother’s figure disappeared.

People gathered in the direction where my brother disappeared, and soon an ambulance arrived, but all I could do was watch the scene unfold as I lay on the ground.

My breathing became rough, and the tears wouldn’t stop.

Even though I called out my brother’s name, that was all.

How much I wanted to see him. Where is the way to say goodbye like this?

Was all the patience I had shown so far meaningless?

I was once again left alone, and the fact filled me with despair in an instant.

Even though I wanted to scream, no sound came out.

Why did you save someone like me?

Please don’t die, don’t die, brother.

If even my brother is gone, I will have no more confidence.

It’s because of me. It’s because of me that my brother ended up like that.

If it wasn’t for me. My brother would still be alive.

It’s not my brother who should die, it’s me… I should have died!

“Then will you go in his place?”

…If I go instead, can I save my brother?

“His physical body is already broken, but if you allow his soul to inhabit your body, it’s not impossible.”

My body with my brother’s soul…?

“However, the price required to save him is your lifespan. Will you try?”

…Yes, I beg you.

“You’re a strange woman, humans usually don’t think about sacrificing their lifespan.”

The world without my brother is meaningless.

So if I can save only my brother, I can give up that lifespan without hesitation.

I don’t care who you are.

So please save our brother.

It doesn’t matter what happens to me, just save our brother!