episode_0702

She couldn’t say anything.

It was obvious that it couldn’t be done.

‘Please cheer me on.’

Are you saying that you want me to watch and support your sister and husband as they love each other?

‘that is….’

It was confusing.

Does it mean that all relationships end just because your body has changed?

If I bury all my past memories, experiences, and relationships in an abandoned body, will it all just end up like it never happened?

no.

Nothing changes just because your body changes.

We held each other and hurt each other.

All the memories, both brilliant and excruciatingly painful, are engraved in my soul, not my body.

That’s why.

‘There’s no way that’s possible…!’

It is unacceptable.

Even though I know full well that I have no qualifications, I can’t even watch, let alone cheer.

Even though I drifted away from him because of greed, I never forgot him even for a moment.

A heart that loves him.

‘Ah, yeah.’

She finally realized.

“I… , I chose wrong.”

I was so worried about which path would be best for him that I realized that I was walking the path that would make him the most unhappy, thinking that it was the path that would lead to happiness.

The reason why this happened is because I didn’t consider the other person’s thoughts and feelings at all.

My heart hurts.

“Ah… … .”

In my head, in my heart, I keep seeing his back getting further and further away.

What I had quickly understood in my head finally dawned on me in my heart.

‘This must have been how it felt.’

The heart of someone who helplessly watches the back of a lover who acts and makes decisions on his own and then drifts away.

‘It was so… difficult and painful.’

Even a fleeting emotion can be so painful, yet he endured it for a full 7 years.

I hoped and hoped for you to come back, but in the end I couldn’t hold out any longer and left.

In the end, it was him.

The culprit who kicked him out of his original body.

‘So it’s right to leave.’

Fortunately, he seems happy now, as if he is being compensated for the seven years of suffering.

If nothing else happens, I’ll be happy forever.

If you want him to be happy, just leave quietly.

All I have to do is hide from him forever any traces of my painful past.

‘That’s all you have to do… .’

My feet don’t come off.

Because the picture she wanted to draw while turning her back on the world was of him being held in her arms, lying on her lap, and sitting facing each other, happy.

It was something I had vaguely hoped for.

Even though we may be far apart now, when that time comes, when that day comes, as if nothing had happened, he and I will be able to become close again.

That’s why it is like that.

The reason I don’t want him to disappear so readily is because I want him to be happy.

‘Ugly bitch.’

Even thinking about it myself, I found it ugly and disgusting.

Knowing that, I should do some self-correction, I should change my mind, but I can’t do that.

Didn’t Han Ju-yeon say that?

Even though we were apart for over 10 years, I couldn’t forget him.

Rather, it came to mind more clearly and only made me feel more tormented.

“Ah… … .”

i get it.

What should I do with the rest of my life when I have lost my motivation?

She lightly stroked her sister’s arm around her neck.

“I’ll cheer you on.”

“… Really?”

The one who was surprised by this was Han Ju-yeon.

I didn’t really expect any cheering.

It was a bit of ridicule and mockery directed at the foolish woman who lost her lover due to excessive greed.

It was also a warning not to run and wave your hand to catch a bus that has already left.

That was enough.

Even if her sister slapped her with an evil expression and ran away, even if she knew she would never see her again as long as she lived, she was willing to accept it silently.

Because that was the kind of love she committed.

A love that anyone who knows its true nature will criticize with ten, a hundred, or even a hundred fingers pointing out and sticking out their tongues.

I want to support a love that would make even a stranger frown.

“Are you serious…?”

“Yeah, I’m serious.”

Her voice was firm as she answered.

Because I have already made up my mind.

“I will sincerely support you.”

To support the love between my husband and my sister.

Because of that, Han Joo-yeon’s emotions were running wild.

I was happy, but as happy as I was, I was sorry, and as sorry as I was, I was worried.

“Are you okay…?”

“It’s okay.”

Contrary to the obvious answer, it may not actually be that good.

But if it’s not okay, you have to pretend to be okay and support the relationship between the two.

“Don’t worry, unnie. Love as much as you want. But…, make one promise.”

“… What is it?”

“I decided not to avoid my sister because my feet were numb for no reason.”

“Oh, sis… .”

Han Joo-yeon buries her head on Han Joo-hee’s shoulder and sobs, tears welling up in her eyes.

“Sigh, I’m sorry, sis. And thank you so much… .”

Han Ju-hee asked back, lightly brushing her hair back.

“Did you promise with your sister?”

“Uh, yeah… , I promise.”

A faint smile appeared on her lips as she managed to get a promise from her crying younger sibling.

* * *

24 hours.

48 hours

72 hours.

As time passed, the pain deepened.

As if to show that there is no limit to the pain a human can feel.

Chris plowed into my body without stopping for even a second.

I became more and more understanding of my body, and through enduring the pain, I deepened my understanding.

This is no time to waste.

Even more so the times when you just have to hold on.

These are growing pains.

The pain that children who are growing rapidly must experience and endure.

As if to prove that it wasn’t a lie, I became stronger.

In a short period of 72 hours, the pain was added and it succeeded in surpassing hundreds of days.

But it wasn’t enough.

The guy and me.

“This is difficult. I thought I would have a clue about his abilities by now… , hmm.”

Although the overall understanding has increased, the important core has been lost.

Eyes that see magic.

Even though I had it all worked out from head to toe, I still couldn’t find the gist.

At this point, not only the guy, but I too am starting to get suspicious.

Where on earth does this ability come from?

I looked into every part of my body through contemplation, with pain.

But I couldn’t find it.

This was truly a curious thing.

“If it is an ability that is expressed in the human body, there should be some signs in the body… .”

It’s just like the guy said.

For each ability given to humans, the process of manifestation and the cause are all different.

There is no such thing as a manifestation without a process, and once it has been manifested, a trace is left on the body.

But there is no trace left in my eyes.

Just ordinary, good eyes.

That doesn’t mean there are any remaining signs in other parts of the body.

At this point, I had to ask them for a favor.

“Look into it a little more closely. Can’t we look into the structure in more detail than we can now?”

“… Well, if you want to make it more detailed than it is now, you have to change the structure itself.”

“Then we have to change it.”

“That’s something you can do in such a short time… .”

“So you’re just going to give up?”

“No, that’s not it.”

I keep thinking about this while encouraging the guy.

And finally, a small fragment passes through my mind.

If it doesn’t remain anywhere in the body, what is the possibility that it remains somewhere other than the body?

For example, a soul that uses the body as a vessel.

“… … .”

It was a random thought, but it seemed quite plausible.

No, I already know.

That the soul is the ultimate destination that man must reach in order to deal with and go against providence.

And what if this eye is one of the abilities released at the final destination?

“… I think that’s right.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I think it’s right to change the blade structure like that, kid.”

“… … .”

You respond even though you know full well that you’re talking to yourself.

After making the guy’s mouth close, he calmly closes his eyes.

When we turn our eyes from looking outward to looking inward, the structure of the body becomes vividly depicted.

It feels as if you are looking inside your body with your real pupils turned upside down.

It was the result of the last 72 hours… no, 80 hours.

Although I have been skilled at observing the inside of my body through observation since long ago, I have now reached a level where I can confirm even the smallest movements in detail as if I were looking through a microscope.

Just five minutes ago, I thought this was the limit.

In fact, it has been at a standstill for the past 70 hours without moving any further.

But maybe we’re going in the wrong direction.

‘Contemplation of the soul.’

Wouldn’t a deeper place be the stage of encountering the soul rather than looking at the body in more detail?

As soon as you become aware of it, a new path opens up.

I sink my consciousness down and down a deep path that I cannot see where it ends.

As you descend into the depths of the ocean, light no longer reaches you and your surroundings become covered in darkness, just as your consciousness also walks into a deep darkness where you cannot even see straight ahead.

A bottomless pit where you can’t even see the path that led you here.

Up, down, left, right.

I just move blindly, wherever my feet lead me, in the darkness where nothing can be distinguished.

I don’t know.

Am I making any progress?

I wonder if I’m just going around in circles in the same place.

A single suspicious thought can branch out into dozens of branches, creating anxiety.

I want to open my eyes right now.

But my heavy eyelids won’t open.

scary.

Am I going to never be able to open my eyes like this?

Wouldn’t I end up wandering around in pitch-black darkness until I die?

But the footsteps do not stop.

I felt like if I stopped doing this, everything would really be over, so I clung to it even more.

I’m getting more and more tired.

“Ah… … .”

My mouth is completely dry, and my throat is stuck together and not easily removed.

It’s painful.

It felt like crossing a vast desert under the scorching sun without a single drop of water.

I suppress the urge to give up and just sit down and rest.

The moment I stopped, I was sure I would never get up again.

Both are scary.

It’s also about sitting down and never getting up again.

No matter how much you walk, you can’t find the exit and just wander around.

So I simply chose.

I chose the latter, which was less scary and gave me a glimmer of hope, and kept walking.

Walking.

Walking.

And walking again.

How did I end up here?

Why don’t you stop walking?

Where is your destination.

As I was walking, having lost everything, suddenly the back of my neck started to feel sore.

Is that because you only look at the ground and walk?

I lift my head towards the sky to relieve myself for a moment.

And I saw.

“Ah… … .”

A single star emitting a faint light, hanging over my head that I had not yet looked up at.

“… found.”

I realized it too late.

I just didn’t see it, but it had already arrived at its destination a long time ago.

“Haha.”

That moment when I looked up at the stars and smiled in vain.

Hwaaak!

The halo of light emitted by the faint star began to grow larger.