episode_0054

“How on earth did someone who was smarter than anyone else end up like this?”

Isn’t that what humans are like?

Just because you’re intelligent doesn’t mean you can live your whole life intelligently, right?

“And even though you went through such humiliation, why didn’t you come back or ask for help?”

You know that.

It was a step brought about by my stubbornness and my innate thirst for learning.

It was such a difficult step, how could I escape?

How can I ask for help?

It was a place I arrived at despite dissuasion, concerns, and warnings about the dark side of aristocratic society.

And if my father had known, I wouldn’t have been valedictorian.

He probably told you to come back right away.

At first, I had no intention of taking revenge either.

He said he planned to forgive any of the four if they showed sincere regret and reflection.

I used the family tradition, but I had no intention of harming it.

Anyway, just marry the winner and live happily ever after.

That is the ultimate purpose of the Battle of Marriage.

“Between Prince Deron and Prince Blund, do you have any intention of choosing a partner for marriage?”

Phew.

Have to choose between Deron and Blund?

That’s really cool, right?

But what should I do?

I don’t know anymore.

At first I was open to the possibility, but now it feels like it’s closed.

Now, I don’t know anything.

no.

Now, I don’t want to know anything.

“Please, please come to your senses! Where on earth has the Grand Duchess I served gone?!”

I’m sorry, but I don’t know either.

Will you find it?

Where am I going?

“I am afraid that if things continue like this, something big will happen to the Grand Duchess. Please, please return to the Grand Duchess you used to be. I’ll pray like this.》

Fuhaha.

What big deal can happen now?

Looks like something big has already happened.

Maybe I should have just died then, instead of enduring the pain that made me feel like I was going to die.

Wasn’t it because of the monster chieftain’s curse, rather than my very existence being a curse?

Everyone is having a hard time because of someone like me.

Wow-!!

… … Crab, Gelwood?

You just hit me in the face… … ?

《Please, wake up from your misguided desire for revenge! Isn’t the Grand Duchess a different person from Deron and the others!!”

… different?

… … Is it different?

… … … It won’t be any different, right?

Look at this.

Even if I get hit, I’m still a cheap person.

Just as Deron and the others got hit, I also got hit, so what’s the difference?

“For this, I will accept any punishment. However, please do not ignore my feelings for the Grand Duchess. The Grand Duchess is someone who deserves to be loved.》

Ha ha ha ha ha.

ha ha ha.

haha.

under.

Gellwood, you know what?

Whether red or blue, all shadows are black.

I guess I only learned academics at the academy.

I went there because I liked learning, but I guess I learned things I shouldn’t have learned.

but.

It is said that humans are animals that learn throughout their lives, follow changes, and adapt quickly to the environment.

They say that through evolution, we became what we are today, the rulers of all things.

Wouldn’t it be like the natural order of things for three years of violence and abuse to be imprinted on me?

Isn’t it natural for it to become an imprint that cannot be erased, chipped away, or dug out?

Maybe I dragged them into the Battle of Marriage just to crush them.

It must have been a cowardly rationalization of the weak to act as a guide and leader.

Pretending to be clean and noble, thinking that you were different from them was just lame.

I guess they were brought into this hell because they wanted to punish them privately rather than officially punish them.

I’m telling you to go through hell and come back here.

okay.

I was a hypocrite who hid the truth and made excuses.

that’s right.

You’re an idiot who tried to catch two rabbits but couldn’t catch even one.

Now I understand.

Mixed with the trash, I became trash too.

So don’t worry, Gelwood.

As everyone wishes, I will stop this revenge.

I won’t get my hands dirty anymore.

Among the remaining candidates, I will choose one and get engaged.

but.

Just as a father knows the ugliness of his youngest daughter, shouldn’t the candidates’ fathers also know the ugliness of their children?

Even after knowing what my child has done, I will forgive any family that wants to be in-laws with the Grand Duke of Winterfell.

I’ll end it like that.

As everyone hopes.

Let’s have a happy ending.

like that.

**

“Ha… … .”

With his emotions changing thousands of times a day, Lemien let out a deep sigh, not knowing which melody to go with.

Laughter burst out, tears flowed, anger built up, and then he let out a sigh.

Even at the moment when I personally sent a letter to Duke Kelid and Marquess Rosfell, I sighed for no reason.

Do I regret that everything is over now?

Do I feel regret for not doing this sooner?

Is the foolishness of the past, not knowing that I was covered in filth by trampling on it myself, deplorable?

I didn’t know.

The walk toward the third outer city is like cattle heading to the slaughterhouse, and the sighs must be holding one’s ankles.

Lemian stops walking and looks up at the night sky.

The moon, shining alone in the pitch-black darkness, looked like me, and the clouds flowing leisurely across the moon looked like Elden, and a bitter smile formed on my face.

Lemien raised his left hand, which was wrapped in bandages.

I tried to catch the clouds that were moving away, but they just flowed by helplessly.

Why do I want to catch that cloud?

Now that everything is over, we should just go our separate ways like the moon and the clouds.

Why do foolish regrets cling to me?

I saw it in a book.

The phrase says that whoever wants to catch a monster must become a monster.

The author explained that in order to catch a powerful monster, you must have corresponding strength, but now I felt like I could understand the inner meaning behind the surface.

He himself became a villain while trying to catch a villain.

Because the person who looked into the abyss of error and became stained by it was testifying to that meaning.

The moon and clouds suddenly became far away from the end of my field of vision.

I lowered my raised hand and lowered my head, hoping that the cloud would go around the world and get closer again.

and.

“… What are you doing?”

I ran into Elden like it was a lie.

I ran into him on a single street after turning a corner.

Am I having a dirty dream again?

Or is it just a vain delusion?

Is this a pitiful reality?

Lemien, who could not be distinguished, moved his chapped lips as if possessed.

“Clouds… I was watching.”

In my blurred vision, I saw a beautiful silhouette.

She was a woman with short purple hair that went well with her red dress.

“New lover… Did you make it…? It’s pretty… … .”

“You misunderstand. I’m just accompanying you because I have an important occasion.”

“Okay… , what… .”

“How did your hands get like that?”

Lemien looked at his left hand, which was wrapped in a bandage.

The left hand that hit Elden’s cheek.

It was disgusting, the palm of my hand being crushed by my sharp fingernails.

“I crushed it with my fingernails… .”

“… Now, are you saying you harmed yourself?”

Instead of answering, Lemian smiled bitterly and looked at Elden’s cheek.

I was afraid for some reason to face him, but naturally my eyes turned and I saw his blood-covered cheek.

And I could see my cleanly healed cheek.

“… wound… … It’s healed… ?”

Why?

The moment I saw his clean cheek, I felt relieved.

Why?

It felt like I was becoming infinitely smaller in front of him.

What is it?

Even after being subjected to violence, it is difficult to face his unwavering eyes.

and.

“Yes.”

At his answer, my inner thoughts suddenly came out.

“Thank goodness… Ine… .”

If I had suffered an indelible scar, I wouldn’t have been able to even face him.

If there were any scars left on his body, he would probably have fainted.

So I was very fortunate.

A wound that has completely healed and become something that never existed.

Of course, that does not mean that one’s violence disappears.

“… I’ll see… … .”

Lemien said that and passed by Elden.

Although my legs seemed to be twice as heavy as before, I managed to walk steadily.

However, I heard his voice from behind me.

“Grand Duchess.”

The steps stopped.

I turned around willingly.

and.

Receive “. It will keep the wound from getting worse.”

Elden approached me and handed me something.

It was a thin, round cylinder.

“Although scarring is inevitable, this ointment is especially effective for healing wounds.”

“… … why… ?”

Give me… ?

I don’t hate myself… ?

When Lemien did not receive it, Elden himself placed it in his right hand.

“Then let’s go.”

And then I took a step back.

The clouds that suddenly approached began to move away again.

Lemien looked at the ointment in his hand.

Elden leaves after handing ointment to himself, who had suffered a wound so large that blood was pouring out of it.

Elden takes care of the hand that scratched my cheek and leaves.

I couldn’t understand that feeling at all.

The laughing bystander was so disgusting and petty that he didn’t want to give him anything, so why did he give ointment to the person who committed the violence?

How can I erase the violence inflicted on my cheek so easily?

Even if there is a hand in front of me scratching my cheek, will I be able to come to him as if nothing is wrong and offer comfort with a calm face?

I couldn’t understand it at all, and I felt really petty and petty about my past self.

together.

Everything I had done so far felt futile and empty.

That’s probably why.

I’m crying.

Tears welled up.

I’m crying.

The sadness exploded.

The back of the cloud that was moving away began to sway as if it had been hit by a swell, and the crying that I had been suppressing until now finally burst out.

The mouth that had been forcing out laughter because it didn’t want to let out tears began to let out tears instead.

Lemien, unable to bear his heavy heart, collapsed into his seat and cried for a long time.

“Ugh… Hmm… .”

Just like it was at the Academy.

Just like in the past day.

Looking at Elden’s back as he walks away.

Holding tightly in my hand the help he had just given me.

After a while.

A drizzle began to fall from the sky.