episode_0229

Blackwood Manor. Ethan’s private room.

Ethan, who had suddenly collapsed in the dining room and brought Lily to his bedroom, was gently stroking her head as she slept peacefully with her head resting on his thigh.

“She must be really tired, not having slept properly for almost three days.”

Ethan was the first to notice that Lily’s condition was deteriorating day by day, as he spent most of his time with her as her exclusive maid.

Therefore, Ethan had been advising Lily to rest since the first day she seemed a bit tired, but she simply didn’t listen.

It was more like she couldn’t rest due to her condition, but Ethan couldn’t help but feel sorry for pushing herself to exhaustion every day trying to fulfill her maid duties, only to end up collapsing.

It was only possible for Ethan to catch Lily’s body before she fell at the dining table because he had a hunch that wasn’t quite right today, following her around.

Putting her head on his thigh like this was just a coincidence. Originally, he had intended to let her sleep in the spacious bed in his room.

Lily, who would wake up with a painful groan every time she tried to separate from him, eventually ended up in this position after several attempts.

“Could she be having nightmares lately?”

If she really hadn’t been able to sleep properly due to nightmares in the past few days, there was nothing he could do to help her. No matter how much he loved Lily, he couldn’t enter her dreams to protect her.

Although Lily was able to escape from nightmares and fall into a deep sleep just by feeling Ethan’s warmth beside her, there was no way for Ethan, who couldn’t enter her mind, to know that.

Instead, he knew that stroking Lily’s head by her side helped calm her down, so he continued to do so for now.

The sight of Lily, who had fallen asleep snuggled against his thigh, was so lovely to Ethan that an insidious desire to kiss her emerged.

“…Come to think of it, what was that just now?”

Ethan, who deliberately turned his gaze away from Lily’s lips and thought about what had happened in the dining room a while ago.

When he told the other maids present that it would be better to let Lily rest after holding her in his arms after she collapsed in the dining room.

The feeling of his heart pounding again as he recalled the action of Lily suddenly opening her eyes and looking at him.

“Surely, it wasn’t a dream.”

Well, whether Lily kissed him in a dream or in reality, it was undoubtedly a kiss from Lily’s side to Ethan.

It wasn’t like the usual times when she would approach him first or demand something, but a pure kiss from Lily to him.

The sensation of her lips meeting his suddenly while she was in his arms surely lasted only a moment, but for some reason, it felt longer.

“What could it have meant…?”

Before the kiss, she had faintly called his name.

Lily had made a displeased expression as if she was having a nightmare, then called his name and relaxed, followed by the kiss.

And that scene, which ended in the same restaurant where her colleagues were, might spread all sorts of rumors among the servants by tomorrow.

“I did have the entrance checked just in case…”

Isabel, who came all the way to the academy to help with Lilith’s work, was someone Ethan could trust, but the maid with the faint presence of pink hair next to her didn’t inspire much confidence.

In truth, Ethan didn’t really care if rumors about him and Lilith’s relationship spread. If their relationship became widely known, at least among the Blackwood servants, then there would be no one left to target Lilith.

More important than such trivial matters was Lilith’s feelings. No matter how much he loved her, if Lilith didn’t want him, then the future he envisioned with her would remain just a dream.

Ethan, who used to get angry at the thought of having to follow a knight if things went wrong, now felt relieved after confirming Lilith’s feelings.

After all, he had kissed her first for his own sake, forgiven himself for trying to force himself on her, and even done things he would never do if they weren’t in love…

And even the recent actions that he couldn’t understand. It seemed certain that she harbored affection for him.

“Phew… Phew…”

“You slept well. Were you very tired?”

“Ethan… I told you not to touch my head…”

Ethan, momentarily surprised by Lilith’s sleep talk, withdrew his hand that was petting her head.

At the same time, seeing Lilith now with her head on his lower body, he couldn’t help but remember the time she had brought her face between his thighs a few days ago.

The action Lilith had done to him then, which naturally reminded him of what was known among nobles as ’embracing the wine bottle neck,’ made Ethan’s face turn bright red on the spot.

“I never imagined she would go that far.”

He had thought that as his exclusive maid, she wouldn’t have much knowledge about sexual matters, but knowing about such actions unexpectedly made him wonder if Lilith was still a young girl at heart.

For a moment, he even thought that she might have more lewd thoughts in her head than he did, but Ethan quickly denied that hypothesis.

“It shouldn’t have been done until after graduation from the academy.”

The temporary lover contract where he promised to give an answer after graduation if their feelings remained unchanged. He had initially thought it was just a way for her to postpone giving him an answer, but after experiencing that action a while ago, he couldn’t think that way anymore.

Until now, he had always kept the thought that he was the only one harboring feelings for her, and Lilith was reluctantly accepting his feelings due to their difference in status.

But if the temporary lover contract she mentioned was truly her sincere feelings, and if she was enduring physical intimacy just because of her ‘saintly’ status…

Perhaps, excluding that one action, there might be other ways to advance their relationship a bit more naturally, Ethan thought.

“What I did with my mouth didn’t seem to affect her saintly status…”

If that level of intimacy was allowed, would other similar actions also be permitted?

Excluding acts of adultery that can clearly be seen as a relationship between a man and a woman, is everything else permissible?

In fact, Edan occasionally interacted with other noble students at the academy, and through them, he gradually picked up some slightly lewd knowledge.

From the recent ‘wine bottle wrapping (metaphorical expression)’ that he experienced with Lillis, to ‘licking the plate of clam soup (metaphorical expression)’, ‘sausage sliding between hotdog buns (metaphorical expression)’, or ‘donuts with holes on both sides (metaphorical expression)’, Edan had heard stories about the slightly scandalous sex lives of other noble students, which he couldn’t help but overhear during noble interactions.

Even if he didn’t disclose the acts he shared with Lillis to others, he couldn’t help but hear about them from other noble students who boasted about their experiences as if they were bragging.

Of course, he had no intention of directly asking her, just thinking about it in his head. Edan didn’t want to bring up such topics himself, fearing that Lillis might start to dislike him or look at him with contempt as if he were a sexual predator.

‘…Maybe I should leave her alone to sleep.’

It wasn’t that Lillis’s head was heavy, or that he didn’t like the current situation of providing her with a knee pillow.

Being in such close contact with her made Edan feel like he might develop bad thoughts if he stayed longer. Just briefly recalling what happened recently made Edan’s head still hot.

-Whoosh, whoosh…

Carefully holding Lillis to prevent his hands from touching strange places, Edan laid her on the bed and quietly tried to leave his room.

“Edan…?”

Lillis’s faint voice reached Edan’s ear, and right after that, his body fell back under the bed.

“Uh?!”

-Thud.

Due to Lillis suddenly pulling his arm, Edan fell back onto the bed again, making for a very embarrassing sight for anyone who saw it.

Like the act of a man and a woman engaging in sexual intercourse, their bodies entwined.

Of course, as both were dressed in suits and maid uniforms, it was clear to anyone that it wasn’t that kind of act. However, their posture was not much different from that lewd pose.

“Wait, Lillis… Are you awake…?”

-Squeak.

“L-Lillis…?!”

As if that wasn’t embarrassing enough, Lillis wrapped her lower body around Edan’s thighs, making it almost impossible for him to move. In a position that was almost indistinguishable from the act of a man and a woman engaging in sexual intercourse, Edan was engulfed in a mix of embarrassment and confusion.

‘No, this can’t be happening… I have to push her away, even if it’s by force…’

If he continued like this, he was in danger of losing his patience and his senses. That’s why Edan, who was trying to detach himself from Lillis, eventually gave up and quietly suppressed his desire while being embraced by her.

“Edan, don’t leave…”

“….”

Unable to shake off Lillis’s pitiful voice echoing in his ear, Edan ultimately gave up on fleeing and quietly endured his desires while being held in her arms.