Chapter 35: Habitual Worship (6)

When I vaguely regained consciousness, the first sensation I felt was a headache.

“Ugh…..”

I inadvertently groaned and clutched my throbbing temples.

Actually, it wasn’t just one or two uncomfortable places.

My body felt stiff and achy too.

The feeling of something digging into my back was definitely not my familiar bed.

So, blinking my eyes, I looked more closely and found myself lying on an unfamiliar sofa.

‘Where am I?’

Rubbing my blurry eyes, I sat up and looked around.

Fortunately, I saw quite a few familiar sights.

Familiar furniture, the room’s layout—I quickly recognized that this place was an office inside the cathedral.

But why was I asleep here?

I tried to recall the reason, but yesterday’s memories were somewhat hazy.

Above all, my head was throbbing too much.

‘First, I need to do something about this headache.’

I habitually placed my palm on my forehead.

Soon, a familiar warmth bloomed from my fingertips, and a soft, bright light spread throughout the office.

“Hooo….”

Now I felt like I could live.

I gently shook my head to see if the headache still lingered, then carefully stood up from the sofa.

And with a much clearer mind, I looked out the office window.

A bluish dawn was breaking.

In the cathedral courtyard, visible from the window, the crowds that had bustled there during the day had completely vanished.

Only the scenery of the alley, with its sporadically flickering neon lights, was submerged in deep silence.

After gazing out the window for a while, I soon opened the office door and stepped outside.

“Huh?”

Before long, I spotted a familiar silhouette at the other end of the corridor.

‘ST?’

She was leaning against the corridor window, quietly looking outside.

I was a little surprised by her appearance, as if she were waiting for something, or perhaps guarding the office front, preventing anyone from entering carelessly.

Could it be that because I didn’t return home last night, she had also waited at the cathedral all night?

‘If so, I feel so sorry….’

ST, suddenly sensing my presence, slowly turned towards me.

Feeling apologetic, I approached her, speaking first.

“Um, ST…. Did you perhaps wait here all along because of me? I’m really sorry. I somehow fell asleep…. huh?”

However, for some reason, her expression seemed slightly different from usual.

As I got closer, she seemed to flinch slightly, and I also felt like she was subtly avoiding my gaze.

How should I put it?

It was her usual blank expression, but for her, there was something… even a hint of bewilderment.

‘Am I mistaken?’

The moment I tilted my head to get a closer look at her expression, she called out to me first.

Her voice was somehow a little lower than usual.

“Eve-nim.”

“Yes? ST, did something happen?”

Her uncharacteristic demeanor suddenly made me worry.

Could some problem have arisen in the order while I was asleep?

But contrary to my worries, only a completely unexpected question returned.

“Do you perhaps…. not remember what happened last night?”

“Huh? Yesterday?”

At the out-of-the-blue remark, I scratched my cheek and tried to recall.

‘So, I definitely remember discussing various things about the order’s operation with Yoanna for a long time……’

After that, I couldn’t recall things clearly.

It felt like a film had been abruptly cut.

As I struggled for a moment to retrieve my memories, ST spoke again in a low voice.

“Eve-nim, from now on, it would be best if you never…. drink alone.”

“Huh? Drink, you say?”

I was a little puzzled by her sudden advice.

But a scene suddenly flashed through my mind.

It was a memory from last night.

Myself, gulping down the remaining wine in the glass, saying I was thirsty.

‘Ah, right! Wine…. I drank that.’

But that was as far as my recollection went.

The rest of my memories were still vague.

Then what on earth had happened for ST to say such a thing?

Panic and worry began to creep in.

“Um, ST, yesterday, perhaps…. I didn’t do anything strange, did I?”

Even as I said it, I inwardly thought, ‘No way.’

In my original world, I didn’t have any particular drinking habits.

According to my university classmates, my only drunken habit was to fall asleep on the spot as if dead.

That too, only happened at friends’ studio apartments; I had never lost control outside.

So, I had never once worried about my drinking habits.

But for some reason… ST wasn’t giving me any answer now.

She just kept her mouth shut, looking at me with a subtle gaze.

The usual ST would have answered my question immediately and clearly.

But now, her blank expression was somehow different.

A look of someone who had so much to say but couldn’t bring herself to speak, desperately holding it in.

And above all…. she looked strangely exhausted.

Like someone who had been tormented by immense agony all night.

The awkward and uncomfortable silence grew longer.

Her uncharacteristic behavior made my anxiety grow as well.

‘No way…. Did I really do something…. something terrible that I can’t remember?’

If it was just simple drunken antics or nonsensical babbling, I might have been relieved.

What worried me most at this moment was something else.

Although I looked like this now, just a few weeks ago, I was a vigorous young man.

So if…. if while drunk, the ‘old man’ hidden inside me had burst out like an untethered colt….

What if I had done something sinister to her?

ST was beautiful enough to evoke such desires.

Facial features more refined than an actor’s.

A slender, well-proportioned figure like a fashion model’s.

A seemingly cold impression at first glance, yet even that was a prominent advantage, making her a beautiful woman.

Her unique cool atmosphere, always exuded by her impeccably neat business attire, was beyond just ‘charming.’

So… what if I couldn’t resist and did something lewd while drunk?

What if I had groped her indiscriminately?

As my thoughts reached that point, a chill ran down my spine, and the blood drained from my face.

“W-W-Wait a minute….”

My heart sank with a chilling sense of crisis.

The thought of needing to confirm what exactly happened yesterday filled my mind.

So I asked desperately, almost pleadingly.

“ST! I didn’t really do anything, did I?! Huh?”
……

But she still said nothing, just bit her lip slightly and avoided my gaze.

“No, please, just answer me!”

In that awkward silence, my anxiety was turning into downright terror.

“ST—!”

==============

In the end, I couldn’t get any answer from ST about what happened last night.

I wasn’t reprimanded for any wrongdoing, but she didn’t clearly tell me what had happened either.

She just treated me as usual, as if nothing had happened.

Hooo, with a short sigh, I tried to compose my complicated feelings.

‘What’s past is past. Yes, let’s forget it.’

That wasn’t the only thing I needed to worry about right now.

Today was the day of the first large-scale mass, and as the face of the order, I had to appear before the believers.

That’s why I was going through these hectic preparations.

“Saintess-nim, here. Please sit here.”

Following the guidance of the female believers, I entered a spacious waiting room prepared behind the chapel.

A space that likely served as a storage room usually was decorated quite plausibly as a dressing room today.

A large mirror covered one wall, and lights shone brightly along its border.

Sitting in the middle of it, I felt like a famous celebrity.

“Shall we begin then?”

As soon as I sat down on the plush chair, about five or six female believers surrounded me as if by prior arrangement.

Among the women, whose eyes sparkled with an unknown excitement, the elaborate preparations began.

A soft brush tidied my hair, and another hand applied something to my face, adding a light touch of vitality.

A cool mist settled on my skin like fog, giving a refreshing feeling, and soon after, a fluffy powder brush tickled my cheeks as it passed.

Were these people originally in this line of work?

Their hand movements somehow felt professional.

As I closed my eyes, entrusting everything to their busy yet skillful hands, I heard a ceaseless conversation in my ears.

“Oh my, how is your skin so clear? It’s just like a baby’s.”

“Your hair is really, so soft like silk, I could touch it all day.”

“Goodness, did you really not wear any makeup usually? No way…. If I hadn’t helped you wash your face myself, I would never have believed it. How can a bare face look like that?”

Most of it was praise for my appearance, so it was a bit embarrassing and awkward to listen to.

But I couldn’t find any flattery or insincerity in their voices or expressions.

They genuinely seemed impressed, so I couldn’t say anything and just smiled awkwardly.

After being fussed over like that for a long time, all the preparations were finally finished.

“There, it’s done, Saintess-nim! Take a look in the mirror!”

The oldest-looking believer exclaimed with a confident voice.

At her words, the other female believers also stepped back cautiously, one by one, with expectant expressions.

As they moved, my entire figure, which had been hidden in the mirror, was slowly and fully revealed.

In this moment, even I couldn’t suppress a short gasp and took a slight breath.

“…..!”

Although my own reflection in the mirror every morning still often felt awkward, the girl in the mirror now looked even more so, truly

like a different person.

Silver hair flowing down softly like silk.

Eyes as clear as the equatorial sea.

Skin as white as the first snow was flawless, and her youthful face held both purity and mystery.

She truly had an appearance befitting the name Saintess.

An appearance as if sculpted by God himself, one that anyone would covet.

‘But, still….’

This appearance felt unfamiliar.

No matter how beautifully I was adorned, I didn’t feel like it was entirely myself.

That was only natural.

The current me was still the me of the past.

A man who would one day have to return to his original world.

So, that beautiful girl in the mirror felt like clothes I had temporarily borrowed until then.

Perhaps that was why I could accept this role of ‘Saintess.’

Amidst such sentiments, I steeled my resolve for what I had to do from now on.

“Everyone worked hard. Well then, shall we head out?”

I gave a short nod to the girl in the mirror and stood up from my seat.

From outside the door, the faint sound of a majestic organ was already audible.

The believers would be waiting.

I took a short, deep breath and headed towards the chapel where the mass would be held.