Still (6)

Her hands wouldn’t move well.

Her heart started beating frantically.

It was truly a horrific sight.

Waking up in the hotel room at dawn, realizing the emptiness of the bed beside her, and coming to the top floor of the Association headquarters as if possessed.

Unlike her appearance of running through the streets while constantly telling herself “it can’t be, it’ll be okay,”

The interior of the top floor, which had surely been monotonous and utterly quiet, was now filled with raw lumps of blood.

The stench that seemed to sting her nose, and the flesh and blood splattered and stuck to the walls all around.

The sticky atmosphere, the space that felt suffocating.

And you.

You, crying.

You, vomiting blood.

You, staggering weakly.

Pain. Groans. Suffering.

Why.

For what reason.

Tell me.

Not realizing her body had stiffened, as she just stared at you, you were only smiling as always.

That appearance was truly so pitiful that she couldn’t stop the overflowing chain of thoughts from dominating her head.

There’s no reason you should become like this.

It was fine, wasn’t it? It was good, wasn’t it? Even today. At least until yesterday. No, I mean. Last week.

Forcibly dragging her trembling legs, she ran and grabbed the shoulders of the woman who looked like she might collapse at any moment.

“Why, are you, here?”

“I promised to drink with you, didn’t I?”

Orli smiled slightly, as if trying to hide many things. The blood stains stuck to her cheeks glistened. Her weak eyes flickered.

“So while looking for a place to get beer, it turned out like this.”

“Why, as you, please! You could have come with me!”

“If we came together, it would have only troubled you. You know. I’m trash, and you’re…”

She slapped her cheek.

Her hand stung. Orli, whose head turned slightly, looked dazed for a moment before smiling leisurely again.

“Your constant desire to stick with me is wrong. Aren’t you loving me too much? You shouldn’t. You don’t belong in a space like this.”

“If you don’t want to get slapped again, shut that mouth.”

The intensity of the suppressed emotions burst out beyond the sentence.

The occasional groans from the surroundings became background noise. Another rough breath was heard. It was the Association President, Lindergel.

“Now you seem to see the situation. Let go of this hand now, and just treat that old man over there, and those people twitching over there. I’ll quietly go to the hotel and prepare the alcohol.”

Orli, who had slumped to the floor leaning against the side of the chair, raised her trembling arm and shook a beer can. Along with a forced smile, her skin split and spat blood.

“I, I told you not to open your mouth. Stay quiet. I’ll, I’ll treat you now.”

Erica, who couldn’t keep up with the situation, only then began to recall healing spells one by one. First, she had to focus solely on saving her without listening to that detestable voice.

“Haa.”

A sigh was heard. Erica unconsciously looked at Orli. Soon after, her bright red lips opened again.

“Stop it already. Please don’t forget your duty. Don’t worry about me either.”

“Why, why.”

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?”

Red blood overflowed. Orli, who groaned a few times, muttered softly.

“Because I have to become like this.”

She inhaled. Heat boiled up in her body. She tried to raise her arm but bit her lip hard. As she glared at her, those premature blue eyes also stared directly at her.

She hated her. She hated her so much. Deeply, for not understanding her feelings.

You knew, didn’t you? You knew all too well that if you came here, you’d end up like this. So why did you come alone? Why are you calmly accepting this life with those eyes?

She wanted to hug her. To hold her in her arms so she couldn’t escape, until she said she couldn’t breathe and asked her to stop.

She wanted to let her know her feelings. She wanted to clearly teach her what she had been turning away from.

It was then. The rough voice of an old man was heard.

“Erica.”

It was a face frowning in pain. Lindergel, leaning on the desk and looking this way, seemed to have difficulty maintaining consciousness.

“Right next to you…”

His gaze went to the sight of her embracing Orli. Orli giggled at his considerably bewildered appearance.

“Mr. Association President. Have you ever been slapped by Erica? This hurts so much. Really. Ha. I feel like crying.”

It was when Lindergel, unable to follow the subject, hesitated and tried to stand up. Erica, who had been slightly probing the gaps in his mind, clenched her hand slightly. The blade dug into his nerves.

Soon after, he collapsed and lost consciousness once again.

“It’s insubordination with a blade added.”

Erica, who chose love, strongly grabbed Orli’s arm after she muttered that. Ignoring her request to be gentle, she dragged her to the elevator.

Fortunately, there was no resistance.

Inwardly,

She felt relieved.

Love is good and all, but I don’t think there are people who treat their lover like this.

Thinking that, I was helplessly dragged by Erica, who was gripping my wrist hard enough to leave marks.

“If you, if you quietly go to the hotel, I’ll, I’ll give you skinship.”

She seemed busy trying to persuade me, in case I might take some action.

It was cute.

“If you listen to me when we get there, this incident will be as if it never… No, no matter what, that’s not possible.”

Right.

That’s a shame.

From the top floor of the headquarters, I didn’t particularly have the energy to move, and since my body and mind had become weak from the moment Erica appeared, I obediently followed her. For her sake, and also to re-establish this relationship, I hoped Erica would clean up the top floor, but once she firmly refused, the situation flowed quickly.

After requesting personnel from the Seodaemun-gu office, her attention was solely focused on me.

“You’ve become skilled at lying. No, should I say you’ve become glib? Saying you’re chasing after the criminal who invaded the top floor, so just follow the treatment procedure…”

“Be, be quiet.”

“Is that why you’re following the treatment procedure for the criminal you’re chasing?”

“……”

Anyway, her face was quite red, perhaps aware that she was doing something wrong. You’re quite cruel too.

“I don’t need treatment, so why don’t we just go drink?”

The place where Erica roughly pushed me away was the hotel elevator.

After catching her breath a few times, the sight of her meeting my gaze again was, how should I say, as if I was truly the only thing in her mind.

“Hm? Don’t want to?”

“……”

She seemed to be judging for a moment whether I would force any particular action. When she opened her mouth after the silence, it was still a voice full of lingering attachment.

“But, it must… hurt. I’ll, I’ll treat you a little bit.”

“I don’t want to.”

“……”

It’s late, but shouldn’t I start creating some distance from now on? The plan is rushing towards its finale, and I need to take the correct posture for that sequence.

I returned to the hotel room and washed my body a bit. After removing the blood stains and gently caressing the split skin, the pieces reconnected with a bit of pain.

I didn’t particularly want to pay attention to my body, so I roughly ignored the shallow wounds and only treated the large scars and ruptured wounds a little. After removing the bullets embedded in my body one by one, the bathroom had become quite dirty.

I washed away the bloody water with the shower and changed clothes. When I came out of the bathroom, Erica was sitting on the bed.

Our gazes met.

“What’s all this fuss at dawn? The district office people must be tired.”

“That’s, because you…”

Erica stopped mid-sentence and looked at me cautiously. It’s strange. I’ve been maintaining the same stance since I was on the top floor.

“…Let me see.”

“What?”

“…Um, you. Your body.”

The clothes I was wearing were neat. There was no blood on them, so there was nothing to frown at visually.

“What if I refuse?”

“I’ll, do it by force.”

Is that your preference?

“So you’re saying you’ll do everything now that we’ve come to the hotel room.”

I took out a beer can from subspace. A black can. It felt cool when I touched it.

“You keep running away.”

“What am I. I might do that.”

“This time too!”

I met her desperate-looking eyes. I still wanted to drink in a gentler atmosphere, but it seemed that might be impossible.

Will such a day ever come?

Well, it probably won’t.

The joy ends today.

“This time too, you went out on your own. Why, why are you doing this? You could have gone with me. At least, yeah. At least if you had pretended to take me hostage while entering the Association.”

“How could I do that when you were sleeping? I’m not that inconsiderate.”

“You didn’t do that before. You did whatever you wanted, and made any situation into what you wanted. Using, using me. Treating me carelessly! But why now…”

Her voice gradually became smaller, and she dropped her arms weakly. So I took a can of beer and slightly leaned into her.

I was immediately pushed away.

“…Forget it.”

“Are you upset?”

Erica snatched the beer can from my hand and bent her finger to tear open the opening in one go. She, looking furious, took the can and quickly drank. While watching her Adam’s apple tremble, I twisted my hair.

“Uh, so. I. Do you know how worried I was? Because of you. I really.”

“I told you not to worry.”

Erica looked at me for a moment and then put down the beer can she was holding.

“Why do you, decide that.”

“Because it’s my body.”

It seemed her reason had been paralyzed. That’s that, but I had to say what needed to be said, so I responded calmly.

I smiled at her deeply frowning face.

She doesn’t seem to like my answer.

As I was doing that, she started gulping down beer again, so I was about to restrain her with my hand but stopped. Even now, that swaying body is slightly worrying.

“Wouldn’t it be better to drink moderately? It seems a bit dangerous to me.”

Silence fell.

“I don’t want to.”

Hazy pupils were visible. Slightly reddened cheeks were a bonus. Erica raised her finger and pointed at me.

“You bastard!”

Her pronunciation is slurring.

It doesn’t seem like she’s even drunk half a can.

As she kept looking at my face and hiccupping a few times, I smiled slightly. Just as I was about to open another beer can placed beside me and bring it to my lips.

A strong scent suddenly wafted over. My clothes were pulled, and a cool breeze blew near my shoulder.

And a shallow pain arose.

“It hurts, it hurts. Wait a moment.”

When I looked down, there was Erica with her face buried in my collarbone.

She bit down once more.

As I unconsciously frowned at the shallow pain, she detached herself and smiled triumphantly as if she had accomplished something.

“…You said not to care because it’s your body?”

Blood slightly flowed from her visible lips. It’s my body, isn’t it?

“…It’s not yours.”

Is that so?

“Then whose is it?”

“Mine.”