Confession, And (1)

Every time the wind blew, Orencia flower seeds filled the sky.

Each time, it looked as if snow blossoms were fluttering.

People marveled at the Orencia flower seeds flying in the sky, and soon laughed joyfully as they were hit by the slowly falling seeds, as if being hit by snow.

Cantatien was a city bordering the Viridia Plains to the south, the Cantasia River to the west and north, and the Orencia colony to the east.

The nearby villages were Lizard Den, and further away Gebel Berg, and to the north across the forest it bordered Ritterdam, but it had developed independently without much relation to those places, so it could be called quite a prosperous city.

“It’s quite a big town.”

Yona sat on a bench and patted her calves.

It was because she had been walking for a long time wearing unfamiliar lady’s shoes instead of the leather shoes she usually wore.

“Yeah, they said it was a medium-sized city, but it seems like it could be called a large city without any problem.”

Alec opened the lid of his canteen and handed it to Yona.

Taking the canteen and moistening her throat, Yona rolled her eyes and looked around.

In front of the bench where they were sitting, there was a fairly large fountain, but since it was winter, no water was coming out.

Instead, around the dried-up fountain, people who looked like couples were sitting all around, laughing and chatting with each other, which was quite a heartwarming scene.

“Everyone! The parade is about to begin—! Please clear the way—!!”

A boy who looked to be just fifteen or sixteen years old ran around the square, shouting at the top of his lungs.

At that sound, people moved aside to clear the way without showing any sign of displeasure.

Immediately, men dressed in fancy clothes rushed out and started tying ropes to stakes set up around the square, creating long barrier lines.

“It seems quite serious.”

“It’s a parade, after all. Looks like they have safety measures too.”

It seems it really is a festival that has continued for quite a long time.

Yona and Alec were blankly watching the scene.

Unintentionally, the bench they occupied seemed to be in a prime location.

The eaves of a store acted as an awning that perfectly blocked the sun that had just passed noon, while still allowing a clear view of the entire square.

With Yona and Alec sitting squarely in that spot, people gathered closely at their feet, waiting for the parade that was said to be starting soon.

‘Still, it’s not as impressive as the square in the Church Territory.’

There wasn’t a fountain there, but instead there was a statue of the Cheonsin.

There was even a stepping stone that the baby priests would scrub clean every morning, so it’s hard to compare.

As Yona was thinking this while watching the square, a large cotton curtain set up on the left side of the square slowly began to be drawn back.

And as the curtain was drawn back, slowly revealing—

“Wow.”

“Wow.”

It was a giant Orencia flower model made by carving and assembling wood, worthy of simultaneous exclamation from Yona and Alec.

An Orencia flower model large enough to easily fit several people inside.

The Orencia flower model, firmly fixed on a large plywood with wooden wheels attached, was in the shape of a bud that had not yet bloomed.

“Wow…”

Yona stared blankly at the sight, lost in thought.

As if her heart had been stolen by that model which so precisely reproduced the Orencia flower, Yona stared with her plump lips parted, and Alec glanced at her furtively.

Thud…

With a heavy sound, the plywood carrying the Orencia flower slowly began to roll out.

Although it was unclear what principle it worked on, the plywood, with no one pulling it from the front, slowly began to move forward carrying the giant Orencia flower model.

“Waaaaaah!”

With cheers, children dressed in green clothes ran out and danced around the plywood.

As they ran around, they kept scattering something white, fluttering it around as if imitating Orencia flower seeds.

It was a spectacular sight to see their smiling faces full of joy and their laughter floating in the air.

Every time the plywood moved towards the square, the flower bud began to open little by little.

As it got closer to the center of the square, the flower bud came closer to full bloom.

“Yona, there’s someone inside that?”

“Oh… you’re right.”

At Alec’s words, Yona stared intently at the slowly opening flower bud.

Although it wasn’t completely visible yet, there was clearly a shadow that looked like a person inside.

“This is really amazing.”

Yona muttered unconsciously.

The model was so intricately well-made, and the Orencia flower blooming as it approached the center of the square was eliciting such an enthusiastic response that people in the square were constantly cheering.

Thunk!

With the sound of a peg being driven in, the Orencia flower finally arrived at the center of the square.

And finally, inside the fully bloomed Orencia flower, someone wearing ethereal clothes like a beautiful fairy was sitting curled up tightly.

The square suddenly became quiet.

Although people had been chattering away, it was because a large-scale noise cancellation magic had pressed down on the square.

But it only blocked sound and wasn’t particularly problematic, so the square just became completely quiet.

People were momentarily confused, but soon closed their mouths on their own and looked at the single Orencia flower that had bloomed in the square.

“Yaaaawn—”

The person who had been sitting curled up stretched out their arms and yawned.

After yawning big as if waking up from sleep, they soon looked around and stood up straight.

Then, with lively and exaggerated gestures, they seemed to look around, and then made a trumpet shape with their hand and shouted loudly.

“Are all these people here to see the Orencia flowers—!”

Then the children playing the role of fairies each ran out and crowded under the plywood carrying the flower.

“Queen—! Yes—! Everyone, everyone has come to see the Orencia flowers—!”

“Then, has winter come unchanged this year as well?!”

“Queen—! Yes—! This year too, winter has safely arrived—!”

“Is that so! That’s wonderful news—! Winter has safely arrived this year too, and my children, the Orencia flowers, will be able to prosper—!”

“Queen—! Yes—! The Orencia flowers will prosper forever—!”

Exaggerated gestures with each line of dialogue.

Exaggerated gestures and loud voices big enough for all the people crowded in the square to see.

It was clear how much they had practiced just for this festival, as there wasn’t the slightest misstep in the dialogue between the queen and the children.

“Amazing. They must have practiced a lot.”

Yona nodded at Alec’s words.

At some point, the noise cancellation magic had been lifted, but people were still watching the scene with interested gazes.

“Now then—! In front of all of you gathered here, I, the Orencia Fairy Queen, declare! This year’s Orencia Festival, begins—!!!”

The queen shouted loudly with exaggerated yet solemn gestures.

As her voice rang out, the fairy children also danced and sang, circling around the Orencia flower.

With the queen’s declaration announcing the start, the Orencia Festival began.

Smiles never left people’s faces.

Even adventurers who do rough work, and self-defense force members responsible for the city’s safety, all mingled together enjoying a good time, and Yona and Alec were among them.

Yona chatted well with complete strangers.

Even though she was talking about things like coming from a place called Evian far away, or going to Lizard Den, people laughed loudly for some reason and chimed in saying, “That’s amazing!”

Alec was also smiling as he watched this scene while emptying his beer mug.

He didn’t have that kind of sociability like Yona. Watching Yona, who seemed like she would survive no matter where you dropped her off, who seemed like she would find her way back even if dropped off in an unfamiliar foreign land, Alec couldn’t help but smile. After all, it was because of that sociability that even though she was called a crazy healer, no one treated her harshly.

‘That is her charm, indeed.’

But Alec was now planning to make that charm his own.

Until now, he had tried to be satisfied as the closest person to her, and he had thought that someday she would realize it and had planned to wait, but because of what happened at the mage community recently, that thinking had changed.

He has to be more aggressive.

He has to push harder.

He has to make Yona realize.

Alec put down his empty beer mug and slowly stood up.

Then he grabbed Yona’s hand who was sitting next to him and pulled her close.

“Come on, come on. If you’re done eating, we should go look around some more.”

“Eh, oh. O-Okay.”

Yona lightly waved her hand to the people she had been talking with until just now and turned to Alec.

“So, where should we go now?”

“A festival doesn’t have a destination. We just wander around.”

“Is that so?”

Yona smiled.

Her eyes sparkled like golden light, making Alec’s heart flutter unconsciously.

*

“Ah, my legs hurt.”

As soon as they returned to the inn to rest, Yona sat on the bed, took off her shoes, and massaged her calves.

They had roughly seen everything there was to see, and now all that was left was to watch the magic fireworks, which could be called the climax of the first day.

Yona wanted to keep wandering outside if possible.

But Alec led Yona back to the inn room, and although Yona got a bit irritated asking why, she didn’t say much once they returned.

“See, your legs hurt. If we had kept wandering around, it would have been even harder.”

“But there was so much to see. Besides, wasn’t that strongman show amazing?”

The strongman show where they put a rock on a lying person’s stomach and smashed it with a hammer, breaking only the rock.

Yona was shocked, but Alec explained that it was all a trick, saying this is how it can be done.

“I’m telling you, I can do that too. It would be amazing if they hit without the rock and the person was fine, hitting on top of a rock isn’t that impressive.”

“Ugh… let’s not talk about it, geez.”

Yona frowned, but Alec just grinned.

“When are the fireworks?”

“Soon.”

Alec said as he approached the window and flung open the wooden doors.

The night sky could be seen directly from the window.

The square could be seen below where the twinkling starlight seemed to pour down.

People were gathered in small groups, eating and drinking something, enjoying their time together,

and the visitors to Cantatien were happy within this one focal point of the festival.

“Yona, come here.”

After confirming that launch pads were being set up one by one in the square, Alec called Yona.

Yona, who had been sitting on the bed, got up at Alec’s gesture and approached the window,

and at the very moment she came to the window and stood beside Alec looking outside—

Bang!

The first firework shot up into the sky with an explosion.

As the firework burst, it embroidered an Orencia flower in the sky,

the second firework that followed created leaves,

the third created stems,

and the fourth created small fairies flying next to the Orencia flower.

Every time a firework flew into the sky, Orencia flowers bloomed in full.

Orencia flowers blooming in the sky as if about to form a flower garden.

And Alec and Yona were quietly looking up at those flowers.

“Yona.”

【Finally!】

Yona looked at Alec, sharply telling the voice of Berbaria she heard in her head to shut up.

Surely not, no. It can’t be. Yona hoped those words wouldn’t come out of Alec’s mouth.

“Yona.”

When Yona didn’t answer, Alec called her name again.

【Didn’t I tell you? That man undoubtedly sees you as a woman too.】

“…Yes.”

Alec reached out and grasped both of Yona’s hands.

The strangely strong force in those hands was even causing a faint pain to Yona, but Alec probably didn’t realize it at all.

Yona quietly looked down at those hands, then looked up at Alec.

Fireworks were constantly bursting, and Orencia flowers were continuously blooming in the sky.

And in the midst of that, Alec was looking at Yona with such passionate eyes.

“Yona. There’s something I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time.”

【See? No matter how much you deny it—】

Yona bit her lip slightly.

Ah— as expected. No, it can’t be.

At least Alec, to me.

“I have, for a long time—”

No.

Don’t say it.

Please don’t say it.

Those words especially shouldn’t be said.

Yona quietly whispered in her heart.

Those words that Alec couldn’t possibly hear.

“I love you, Yona. Will you be with me?”

Yona quietly looked into Alec’s eyes.

So you didn’t believe my words either.

You were seeing me as a woman too.

You were like that too.

No,

Even you.

Something hot surged up.

Betrayal, anger, frustration, sadness, powerlessness, despair, discouragement, melancholy, depression, heartbreak.

Numerous words flashed through her mind.

Unable to give any answer, Yona just quietly looked at Alec.

【Do you understand now? You are a woman. No matter how much you claim you were a man, this is the reality. No one will treat you as a man. Even this person who has spent the most time with you has seen you as a woman. Wouldn’t it be better to accept it now?】

“…Alec.”

She couldn’t accept Alec.

Because Yona didn’t think of herself as a woman.

She couldn’t reject Alec either.

Because if she did, Alec would leave.

‘Shut up, you snake. No matter how much you babble, you won’t shake me.’

【Oh my.】

“Yes.”

Alec was looking at Yona with eyes full of expectation.

While looking at those eyes, Yona found herself absurdly feeling sorry for Alec about what she was about to say.

About Alec, who didn’t believe her words and saw her as a woman—

If asked if she was disappointed, she was disappointed.

If asked if she felt hurt, she felt hurt.

But if asked if she disliked him because of it, that wasn’t the case.

No, no.

It’s not Alec’s fault.

Of course not.

‘With a body like this, it would be stranger if someone believed me insisting I’m a man. Yeah, Alec isn’t bad. I’m the strange one. Yeah, I’m the strange one. But… but.’

Yona gathered her thoughts.

She firmly gathered her mind that seemed like it might give in to Berbaria’s constantly whispering voice.

She couldn’t accept Alec.

The last remaining strand of her self was shouting at her that at least that much was not allowed.

She couldn’t let Alec go.

Something unknown was shouting at her from somewhere in a corner of her heart.

Then,

Then.

I’m sorry for being so selfish, but.

“…It’s difficult, right now. You know what my goal is.”

Yona forced herself to smile.

That smile was overlaid with the light of bursting fireworks, becoming somewhat grotesque, but it didn’t matter.

Yona was looking straight at Alec.

Right now, she had to properly convey her feelings.

“So. Right now… I can’t accept your feelings. I’m sorry, Alec.”

The world was collapsing.

The reason that she should reject Alec,

and the instinct that feared Alec leaving.

As the two clashed violently, the world was collapsing.

The rigid world that had surrounded Yona’s heart,

the world of self-consciousness that had firmly protected her,

was collapsing.

Amidst the scattering fragments, Yona stood quietly.

Unable to do anything, Yona just blankly watched her collapsing world.