What is Hot and Cold? Is it a Sweet Food Made of Flour? – 2

Cordelia’s mind was overwhelmingly complex. Ignoring Mikhail who greeted her cheerfully proved to be more painful than she expected. To pretend not to know a friend who had always been helpful, who just yesterday was playing silly pranks with her—overnight.

Originally, she had planned not just to ignore him but also to use cold words. However, after trying once, she realized even managing her expression was at her limit, so Cordelia decided to just keep her mouth shut.

No matter how much she felt this couldn’t continue, was it really okay to cut off feelings in such a crude way? Wasn’t there a more moderate approach?

Whenever her resolve weakened, Cordelia renewed her determination by watching Hestia chatting happily with Mikhail. She didn’t want to betray her most precious first friend or the grateful friend who had always helped her. How much would Hestia suffer if Mikhail, shaken by her, ended up giving his heart completely to her? And how much would Mikhail, betraying his fiancée, and herself, betraying her friend, suffer?

‘Yes, if I suffer a little, everyone can be happy.’

Cordelia’s resolve was needlessly firm. So she was relieved when she heard Mikhail’s question about whether she would never speak to him again.

Although it was painful, as if a stone had fallen on her heart, it would be less painful than watching the relationship between herself, Mikhail, and Hestia crumble because of her.

Later, after Mikhail’s feelings were all sorted out and he had a splendid wedding with Hestia. At that time, if she explained the situation, they could become friends again.

‘Oh, can I not even attend the wedding?’

Cordelia felt her resolve weakening precipitously at the thought of Mikhail and Hestia’s wedding. Come to think of it, how could she attend their wedding after cutting off relations like this? Her face wasn’t that thick. It would be a place where no one welcomed her.

“Mikhail, should we invite Cordelia too?”

“No, don’t invite her. She said she’d never speak to me again, so why invite her?”

“You’re right.”

The conversation between the happy couple naturally played out in Cordelia’s mind. In her imagination, Mikhail’s face contorted just at the sound of Cordelia’s name. To not be able to attend the wedding of her two most precious friends. Cordelia lifted her head as tears welled up.

Due to her overflowing imagination and sensitivity, in Cordelia’s mind, Mikhail and Hestia’s wedding proceeded under everyone’s blessing, with everyone laughing and enjoying themselves, except for her.

Sniff. Cordelia forcibly held back her tears. She felt that if she cried here, she wouldn’t be able to control her emotions. For a while, she kept her head up and looked at the ceiling to prevent tears from flowing down. After calming down to some extent and the tears receding, she could finally lower her head and look ahead.

After their earlier conversation, Mikhail went around asking questions. He went from talking with Hestia to Lily, and finally to Roji, one of her newly made friends. Even for Cordelia, who wasn’t very perceptive, with such an obvious itinerary, she couldn’t help but notice.

‘Because of me…’

Mikhail was probably worried about her sudden change in attitude and was going around asking people who were close to her what had happened. Just earlier, he had asked if she would never speak to him again, but behind her back, he was worrying about her and stirring things up everywhere. Cordelia felt ambivalent about this.

On one hand, she wished he would just give up and not render all her efforts and pain futile, but on the other hand, she was glad that he was concerned about her even when she suddenly ignored him and acted out. Though she denied it, the feeling of happiness was actually much stronger.

It was natural for everyone except herself to know that her change wasn’t voluntary, but she had no way of knowing that. She trembled her shoulders, whimpered, and her voice shook as if there had been an earthquake every time she ignored a conversation—how could anyone not notice?

Unaware of all this, Cordelia was blankly staring at Mikhail when their eyes met, and she hurriedly turned her gaze away. Why is he looking this way? Even though I treated him so harshly, has he still not organized his feelings of liking me? Cordelia’s delusions began to branch out further.

She started to imagine future situations by substituting herself and Mikhail into the characters from the numerous romance novels she had read. Protagonist Hestia and male protagonist Mikhail. And herself, the sub-female protagonist who stirs the male protagonist’s heart.

Works featuring sub-female protagonists were hard to find. Usually, the woman who shakes the protagonist’s heart is either a temporary villain or doesn’t appear at all. And even when they do appear, their ending is usually not good.

The best ending would be finding another man and living happily, but usually, they’re ruthlessly abandoned and spend the rest of their lives in solitude… Cordelia shook her head vigorously. She absolutely hated such an ending.

‘What if I’m actually the female protagonist?’

Cordelia came up with a reverse perspective. Aren’t there novels where the heroine breaks up with her trashy ex-fiancé, receives help from a new man, and has a romance with him?

In fact, there were many more novels like this. The female protagonist Cordelia with many wounds, and the male protagonist adulterer Mikhail who embraces and helps her. A very typical and predictable story. But there’s always a reason why the typical and predictable sells well.

Unconsciously, Cordelia imagined Mikhail deceiving Hestia’s eyes, having secret meetings with her, and whispering words of love. On a dark night without a moon, in a quiet garden without people, the two meet. Mikhail takes her hand. The pure Cordelia couldn’t imagine progressing any further. But even just that gave her a thrilling, chilling feeling that seemed addictive.

‘Am I crazy?!’

She was startled by the fact that she had such thoughts and woke up from her delusion. Feeling like she had lost her mind, she pinched her thigh. The student sitting next to her looked at her strangely, but she didn’t particularly care. No matter how she thought about it, this was truly inappropriate. If she continued like this, wouldn’t it seem like she was anticipating such events?

She felt guilty about the chilling and thrilling sensation that had just run down her spine. She couldn’t possibly admit that she had enjoyed this sense of transgression. Cordelia decided to constrain herself even more.

“Oh, by the way, I finished reading ‘Female Knight and the Wolves’ that you lent me. It was even more interesting than I expected. Could you recommend another book?”

For the past few days, Cordelia’s plan seemed quite successful. But this morning, seeing Mikhail’s clearly changed attitude, it seems that success was only momentary. Cordelia was having trouble figuring out how to deal with Mikhail, who had changed tactics and was now pushing forcefully.

Suddenly, he started talking about the weather, asking if she had breakfast, in an even brighter voice than usual. Especially when he mentioned “Female Knight and the Wolves,” she almost went crazy with the urge to respond. She felt like she wanted to sew her mouth shut. Just when she thought he had given up since it had been quiet for a few days, he suddenly approached like this. And even bringing up her favorite novel!

This is cheating. It’s unfair. Cordelia was grinding her teeth internally. She was so shaken that her hands and feet moved in sync when walking. When even that was pointed out by Mikhail, Cordelia couldn’t keep her composure. But this was just an appetizer. What truly flustered her was something else.

“You look especially beautiful today.”

Mikhail’s sudden compliment was a critical hit to her. It drove a wedge into her wavering heart. For the past few days, although she didn’t show it, Cordelia had been constantly thinking about herself as the tragic female protagonist and Mikhail as the adulterous man. Mikhail’s words thoroughly scattered Cordelia’s already confused mind.

In her brain, Mikhail’s words had already been transformed from a simple compliment on appearance to a passionate love confession. Whispering such words in the hallway.

Unable to endure any longer, Cordelia chose to flee. Even his shout from behind telling her not to run in the hallway sounded like a warm concern to her.

“So you just ran away?”

“Well, not exactly.”

Roji, having heard Cordelia’s explanation, asked incredulously. Another female student also chimed in. The aspiring female knights were fervently discussing an untimely romance.

Not knowing what to do, the wandering Cordelia eventually sought them out again. After hearing Cordelia’s words just now, they first scolded her. But in truth, they didn’t know how to handle such a situation either. After all, they were girls who had never had any connection with men and learned about love only through books.

“Perhaps Duke’s Heir thinks that Lady Cordelia is playing hard to get?”

One of the female students who had been quietly listening spoke up. The other female students agreed, finding her words plausible. It certainly was “playing hard to get” in a way. Except that the one playing wasn’t Cordelia but Mikhail.

“What is ‘playing hard to get’? Is it something like a sweet food made of flour?”

Everyone’s faces filled with astonishment at Cordelia’s innocent question. Is this mentally pure lady really an adult?

“Lady Cordelia, ‘playing hard to get’ is…”

Eventually, Roji, the most knowledgeable about romance—more precisely, the one who had read the most romance novels—stepped forward to explain the concept of “playing hard to get” to Cordelia. Though Cordelia didn’t know the term, she could quickly understand the concept itself.

In the end, isn’t it just pulling when someone pushes and pushing when someone pulls? She wondered why there was a need to pull when you could just always pull if you like someone, but that wasn’t the important issue now.

“So Mikhail thinks I’m pushing him away right now?”

“It’s not certain, but possibly.”

Cordelia furrowed her fine brow. She sought advice from these grateful romance experts (with zero romance experience) who were helping her.

“What should I do?”

Just as the conversation reached this point, Mikhail, who had leisurely followed Cordelia, smoothly joined them. It was an incredible timing. The romance experts, who were contemplating how to respond, quickly exchanged glances.

“What were you discussing?”

The girls, who had been excitedly talking about Mikhail just moments ago, scattered in all directions like cockroaches in a storage room when the door opens. Their movement seemed to say, “You two figure it out yourselves.” Only Cordelia, who had momentarily lost her senses upon seeing Mikhail’s face, remained to face him. Mikhail let out a small laugh, “Huh,” at their absurdly quick movements.

“…”

Mikhail stared intently at Cordelia, who was left alone. Cordelia, who had previously looked at his face with ease, now found it impossible. The confession he had whispered in her ear just now had not yet faded, how could she?

Mikhail, on his part, was also pondering. What is with this lady, suddenly making such a shy expression and avoiding my eyes? Because of what I whispered earlier? No, if I fall for it again after being thoroughly teased last time, wouldn’t I be a real fool? Mikhail steeled his wavering heart.

“Lady Dene—, Cordelia.”

“…!”

Cordelia fell into an indescribably strange mood when Mikhail suddenly called her name. Mikhail fundamentally doesn’t call anyone by their name except for Hestia. He always uses the last name with “lady” attached and speaks formally.

In reality, he naturally used informal speech with Hestia because she was his fiancée, having established that from their first meeting, while the formal speech and honorifics towards Cordelia were because he hadn’t found the right timing to change the address and switch to informal speech, but she had no way of knowing this.

Cordelia naturally thought that Mikhail used formal speech and honorifics to maintain a strict distance from all women except Hestia. But now he suddenly omits the honorific and calls her by name?

Cordelia’s misunderstanding snowballed. There’s a term called confirmation bias. Simply put, it means people only see what they want to see, and that’s exactly Cordelia’s situation now. Once Cordelia started thinking that Mikhail liked her, every single thing he said and did seemed like courtship directed at her.

Meanwhile, Mikhail, unaware of what Cordelia was thinking, inwardly rejoiced at the sight of her trembling shoulders.

‘Calling her by name is effective. If I keep pushing while using her name, she’ll open up soon.’