Chapter 7: Returnee Gallery (2)

Alright, should I try writing a post then?

—

[Author: HeadSmasherSaint]

[Title: Hello~ I’m a New Returnee!]

I came here because they said you can find good information for returnees from the dedicated department.

Could anyone share tips for living in Korea as a returnee?

—

I’ve posted like this for now.

And soon enough, comments poured in.

Dwarf9218: Pretty?

From the 24th century: Look at the username. Are you a physical saint? -Androids are the best

RevolutionaryLeader: Tips and all that crap, just live like normal people. This place is just for jerking off.

MaxSizeCentaur: Do you like horses by any chance?

KnightCodeOnly30Years: If you’re a girl, filter out MaxSizeCentaur.

“Wow, comments are coming in right away.”

—As expected, the saint seems quite popular.

There were more comments than I thought.

Should I have pretended to be a guy?

Is it good to reply to each comment?

It’s probably best to do that if you want to seem friendly like a saint.

How long has Dwarf9218 been left without a wife to post comments like this?

No, well, I have some memories of being a man, so I understand a bit.

From the 24th century seems to be like an android.

RevolutionaryLeader seems like some kind of terrorist organization guy from somewhere.

MaxSizeCentaur must be into NTR or something with that Centaur.

KnightCodeOnly30Years has probably been a knight in this world for 30 years, so he must be quite old, right?

I decided to reply to the comments in order.

—I just look like a saint.

—Yes, I am a physical saint.

—Ah, I see.

—I prefer dogs over horses.

—The goddess said to treat people equally.

I replied reasonably, but more comments came in.

SolinderMan: If you’re a new returnee saint, are you the one who recently resolved the flooding issue that the Selhwa Guild was having trouble with?

└HeadSmasherSaint: How did you know that?

PureheartedElfHere: Ah, LOL, it’s been six months since such a flashy act by a returnee appeared. Who wouldn’t know? LOL

└MaxSizeCentaur: Saint, do you have any plans to switch from horse to speech this time?

└HeadSmasherSaint: It seems like returnees aren’t coming well?

SolinderMan: There have been a lot of returnees since three years ago. Dozens would come in a day. Since everyone came, I thought the cool time would be long or over. Seeing you come alone, what happened in your world?

—

I never thought it would spread this quickly.

If I knew, I would have come sooner.

That bastard of a hero fought the battle several times because of a child and delayed going to the Demon Castle.

Suddenly imagining it makes me so annoyed.

—

└HeadSmasherSaint: Because of the hero who is the party leader, he insisted that demons are also alive, so I was late to catch the demon because I had to deal with the kids every time.

└Dwarf9218: LOL.

SolinderMan: Since the integration notice was written on the badge, it’s good to read information related to returnee social adjustment.

—

F*cking bastard who had his wife NTR’d and tore it apart.

I stopped swearing big.

SolinderMan seems to be the only normal one.

Maybe he’s Slenderman?

Anyway, you shouldn’t do things like a gallery.

I decided to just look at the relevant notices in the announcement.

—

[Author: Fallen Angel]

[Title: Returnee Integration Notice]

Since you guys don’t watch everything one by one, I linked only what you need to see.

Read about what you want to see, and count any problems with the comments.

[Returnee Welfare System]

[Returnee Special Benefits]

[Returnee Employment Related]

[Best Korean Restaurants]

—

It’s fairly well organized.

I’ve read about returnee welfare systems, special benefits, and employment related stuff, and the department said if the returnee is capable of employment, the best thing is to be a hunter.

For Korean restaurants, I just wrote down what would come out if I checked separately.

It really seems to be for making friends.

I decided to close the gallery for now.

Oh, all of a sudden, I’m craving liquor and cigarettes.

I decided to post another article on the gallery.

—

[Author: HeadSmasherSaint]

[Title: I’m going to the convenience store. Can you recommend liquor and cigarettes?]

I’ve only tried honey wine in the hero world.

[Comments]

100 Years Aged Succubus: Let’s go with soju for liquor. Treat it like a cigarette. Is it okay for a saint?

└HeadSmasherSaint: The goddess guarantees the body, so it’s healthy no matter how much alcohol and cigarettes.

—100 Years Aged Succubus: Are you cheating alone?

RevolutionaryLeader: If you’re going to the convenience store, it’s usually all averaged.

MaxSizeCentaur: I’m good at drinking alcohol. How about you?

OverweightOrc: Earth’s liquor didn’t make you drunk. Just drink whatever.

SolinderMan: That’s because your body is big.

OverweightOrc: The Marmot Pottery kid.

—

“I’ve seen you drink before. But have you been smoking behind my back too?”

“No, it’s just that cigarettes are expensive, and I was curious about the taste.”

“No way! My body is like an extension of yours. I can’t stand the smell of cigarettes!”

“Uh, okay.”

Damn.

If I told her that I used to be called a chain smoker in the other world when we lost contact, she’d probably foam at the mouth.

Cigarettes might have been different in concept from Korea’s, but they did exist.

They were called ‘mana herbs,’ and they helped restore magic power.

But when you burned and inhaled them into your lungs, it felt incredibly good.

Even if you were hungry, you wouldn’t feel it anymore, and even if you were sleepy, you’d feel wide awake.

It made you feel happy and light.

We dried and crushed it to make cigarettes.

For someone like me, who was under all sorts of stress because of the hero, mana herbs were nothing less than a lifeline.

Now that I think about it, wasn’t that more like a drug than a cigarette?

“Well, whatever.”

Anyway, if the boss says no, then I shouldn’t do it.

No choice.

Maybe I’ll just go buy some instant noodles at the convenience store.

I’ve got plenty of money, but I’m craving something cheap.

I vaguely remember working at a convenience store a long time ago.

Not many memories, but there was one thing I really wanted to do back then.

If I ever got rich, I wanted to try this.

That was to buy all the expensive stuff in a convenience store and eat it.

“Let’s go right now.”

“Are you going like that?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. I might be showing some leg, but this is much better than the saintess robe where the sides were completely open.”

“You should wear your saintess robe!”

“No, seriously. Don’t you think that’s a bit much? After everything I’ve been through, can’t I do at least this much? Do you have any idea how terrible my life as Karina was because of you?”

“Fine, fine! Ugh, are you still going to hold that over me?”

If you had a conscience, you wouldn’t ask for this.

After a bit of an argument, I finally left.

The convenience store was just around the corner.

Even in this changed world, convenience store jobs still exist, huh?

Don’t they have unmanned convenience stores?

As I entered, a young man who seemed to be working part-time saw me and was visibly startled.

“Hello.”

“Uh… uh, welcome!”

I greeted him, and he turned red.

Jeez, hopeless.

No matter where I go, my appearance always seems to cause a stir.

Being beautiful is tiring.

But it’s just a passing encounter.

For now, I decided to pick some food.

“Whoa, there’s a ton of stuff.”

They had boiled pork slices, pig’s feet, blood sausage, tteokbokki—so many types.

Even rice bowl series—pork rice bowl, eel rice bowl, beef rice bowl, kimchi fried rice.

No way I could eat all of this, but one thing was clear, my body definitely wanted it.

“Maybe I should write one more post.”

There seem to be a lot of people on the gallery, so why not?

—

[Author: HeadSmasherSaint]

[Title: First time going to a convenience store since returning.]

I’m going to wipe out all the food here. Any recommendations?

[Comments]

100 Years Aged Succubus: You pig. How much are you going to eat?

└HeadSmasherSaint: My body is guaranteed by the goddess, so no matter how much I eat, I don’t gain weight.

└100 Years Aged Succubus: Copy-pasting now, you 10-year-old brat…

└HeadSmasherSaint: My body is guaranteed by the goddess, so no matter how much I eat, I don’t gain weight. How about eel rice?

Mermaid: Don’t eat fish. You’ll regret it.

└100 Years Aged Succubus: And you’re asking for recommendations while saying you’ll eat everything? You’re definitely bragging about not gaining weight.

└HeadSmasherSaint: But I might get full, so I’ll stick to my stomach’s limits.

└Mermaid: You 100-year-old fermented hag! Did you not see the notification above? Watch it, scaly legs!

└100 Years Aged Succubus: Mistakes happen, you psycho. Stop fussing over it. At least I don’t have to shave scales off my legs like you do.

—

Looks like the Mermaid and the Succubus granny are about to start a fight.

The women here really have strong personalities.

Not my problem though, so I turned off the notifications.

But thanks to them, I thought of what to eat.

“When someone tells you not to do something, you just want to do it more.”

So I decided to get eel rice and some fermented kimchi stew.

Is soju called Jinro?

I grabbed a bottle of that too.

And some snacks.

Might as well throw in some ice cream.

“Can you ring me up, please?”

I placed the fermented kimchi stew, eel rice, Jinro, snacks, and ice cream on the counter.

The part-timer looked uneasy, like he had something on his mind.

Oh, I know what this is.

“Uh, do you, by any chance, have a phone number?”

I’m not stupid.

I’ve dealt with this enough in the other world to recognize the signs.

Fifteen years living as a woman—if you count the time I lived like an empty shell, it’s probably longer than my time as Park Siwoo.

By now, I can tell when a guy is interested in me.

“To be honest, damn. Anyone and everyone is confessing these days.

Even though I’m a saintess, there’s only so much I can handle.

It’s common sense—our levels are completely different, and I can’t think of a man as a romantic interest.

But that doesn’t mean I can openly show that I’m annoyed, especially in the body of a saintess.

Then a good idea came to mind.

“I don’t have a ‘burner’ phone, so don’t bother looking for it.”

“Oh, okay.”

He seems to have gotten the message, lowering his head.

Honestly, he probably just hit on me because he thought I was pretty. Know your place. Do you really think your face and mine are on the same level?

I gave a mental middle finger to the convenience store part-timer, paid for my items, and left.

On my way out, something crossed my mind.

“My filter’s completely off now, right?”

-It was always something stuck to you like a professional hazard.

It feels like something is still stuck in my mouth. Don’t you think so?

I wasn’t even annoyed earlier. I declined gently, politely, and gracefully.

Most women would’ve shown clear signs of irritation.

Anyway, let’s take a picture and post it on the gallery.

Since I picked my menu thanks to the Mermaid and the Succubus.

—

[Author: HeadSmasherSaint]

[Title: Thanks to Mermaid and Succubus, I was able to pick my menu.]

[Picture attached]

I chose eel rice and fermented kimchi stew.

[Comments]

100 Years Aged Succubus: Are you calling me by the right nickname? If someone beats you up in your dreams, just know it’s me.

Mermaid: Seriously, of all things, you had to pick eel rice? My neighbor was an eel. And what’s with calling me Mermaid? It’s insulting to treat me like a fish.

└100 Years Aged Succubus: What’s with this eel obsession? If you’re gonna complain, don’t pick that stupid nickname in the first place.

Mermaid: You’ve been picking fights since earlier. Are you a dried-up old hag with no conscience, calling yourself that?

└Elder Juicy Succubus: Someone called me?

Dwarf9218: LOL, total noob.

Solinderman: LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Pure Elf Here: LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Overweight Orc: LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

—

‘Do these people do nothing but hang out on the gallery all day?’

Are they all just unemployed?